Sudden Realizations

Some say that life is like a journey filled with numerous trials. It's akin to a stone tumbling into a stream, initially with sharp edges, but over time, as it's worn down by the water's flow, it loses its edges, becoming smoother and rounder.

This process might be filled with pain, yet it's the path to growth. As days go by, the seasons change. After experiencing many things, we suddenly understand.

About Life

Suddenly, I understand: Living healthily, peacefully, happily, and being moderately busy is already good enough. Everyone will face a dark period. During those days, we endure tremendous pressure. It might be long-term efforts that didn't achieve our goals; or giving a lot but not getting recognition; or having well-thought-out ideas but not receiving family understanding. Many things bind us, making us feel tired. However, life is like this; many times, things don’t go as we wish. Perhaps, for some time, life might feel incredibly challenging, with no hope in sight. But as the saying goes: "Do your best, try your hardest, and then let fate decide." When one path is blocked, take another; when a problem is hard to grasp, change your mindset to solve it. After one experiences all the darkness, they’ll realize the difficulties once thought of were not worth worrying about.

Don’t look like you can't handle a little pressure. Don't feel that the future is dark because of a little uncertainty. Don't be disheartened by a setback. In this life, there will inevitably be wrong paths, hardships, setbacks, and traps, and not one will be missing. Persist, get through, move on, and good fortune will naturally come. Living healthily, peacefully, happily, and being moderately busy is already good. In the years to come, may you adjust your mindset, go with the flow, and not let life's pressures burden your life.

About Life Pace

Suddenly, I understand: Each person's life pace is different, and there's no need to be anxious because others got something ahead of us. Have you ever felt like this: throughout our lives, we’re always being chased by the relentless flow of time. In our teens, we fret about academic achievement, and if a classmate scores a bit higher, we rush to study harder; In our twenties, we fret about work and marriage, hastily entering matrimony upon seeing friends married; In our thirties, we fret about children and houses, scrimping while spending significantly on kids' classes and juggling mortgage payments, longing for a bigger home; In our forties, we fret about unemployment, diligently working while pondering side businesses to boost income. Many people spend their entire lives in frenzy, always feeling anxious. They never get the chance to leisurely enjoy the beauty of the world, savouring the bloom and withering, the ebb and flow of clouds. But this kind of life is just too exhausting. One should understand that everyone's pace of life is different.

About Own Pace

Some take 3 minutes for instant noodles; others spend 3 hours making soup. While someone's takeout has arrived at their doorstep, another has just finished chopping garlic and meat. At the barbecue stall, the quickest to be ready is the cucumber dish, and in some buns, the first bite might lack meat. Choose the path you believe is right and proceed with determination, free from unnecessary thoughts. Everyone's pace in life is different; no need to be anxious because someone got something ahead of you. Rather than worrying all day, remain calm, and follow your own rhythm. Take a moment, complete what you should do, be practical, and take one step at a time. The efforts you put in during March and April will naturally yield answers in August and September.

About Love

Suddenly, I understand: Love should be a process that helps each other become better, not mutual depletion. There was a topic asking: "What grievances have you experienced in love?" The comments were quite heart-wrenching. Some went through arduous paths to see someone but received only coldness and indifference. Others meticulously sacrificed, yet all they got was the other's intense demands. Some were treated as invaluable while cherishing their partners as treasures. And others, despite being genuine partners, never appeared in the other's social circles, as if they were a secret lover.

Have you also lost yourself in love and gradually become someone else?

Haruki Murakami once said: "I have the thought of leaving you. It’s not because you're bad, nor that I don’t love you anymore. It's just that the way you treat me makes me feel your world doesn't lack my presence. I could choose to cling to you desperately, but it's pointless. When I'm with you, I become worse, bringing out my weaknesses, impatience, jealousy, and insecurity, evoking the worst side of my character. Therefore, instead of draining each other, it's better to let go. If in a relationship, all you feel is grievances and unhappiness, it's better to let go. A good love should be two people facing life's tests side by side, not making you lose your passion and belief in life. This life is long; there may be many challenges in the future, but being with someone truly in love can help hold up an umbrella against the storms life bring."

May you learn to reconcile with life in the future, without pressuring yourself too much or overanxious, and not sacrifice yourself for someone who doesn't genuinely love you. Let the past fade away and don't worry too much about gains and losses.

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Reflections: To Myself Gradually Growing Old

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Reflections: To Myself Gradually Growing Old

Time passes like flowing water, never waiting for anyone. Winter goes, spring arrives, and years swiftly slip by, with a person's life only comprising around thirty thousand days. The ruthless edge of time leaves numerous marks of the years on people. Imperceptibly, we too age alongside.

As we age, we gradually understand that there aren't many essential things in life.

Maintain Emotional Balance and Sustain Health

Humans experience various emotional fluctuations, where some might erupt in anger while others remain calm. Life is a journey where one encounters various people and situations, and not everyone can understand you. Growing older, we come to realize that a broad mind resolves matters smoothly and a calm heart fosters harmonious relationships. Prioritizing emotional care and sustaining health is more critical than anything, as life is fleeting.

Stay Optimistic and Positive Towards Everything

It's said that the heart is the lamp in a person's body; when the heart is dark, the world appears dark, but with a bright heart, the world is illuminated. Life encounters many unexpected situations. Ups and downs are the norm, and no one has a smooth journey. Some things bring sheer joy, while others leave one feeling vexed. Whether good or bad, it's important to learn to be positive and optimistic, facing life's fluctuations with composure. "A small heart makes big problems, a big heart makes small problems." Learn to accept everything, not be disturbed by difficulties, and not be troubled by trifles. Learn to let go of things that need to be released. With age, learn to free your mind.

Refine Each Day, Embrace Old Age Calmly

Life is not as beautiful as you imagine, nor as bad as you fear. Previously, we lived for others, carrying all the burdens, but now we learn to travel light and live for ourselves. Life, whether in death or life, seems passive. Even though life appears to offer many choices, it often lacks genuine options. Nevertheless, life has passed in this manner. As we age, we gradually understand the importance of exploring our interests, finding a spiritual belonging. Approach each day earnestly and embrace old age calmly.

Simplify Your Social Circle, Appreciate Solitude

Solitude is a form of self-indulgence. With age, we need to learn to reduce our social circle and savor the beauty of spending time alone. The circle isn't about quantity but quality. To broaden our horizons, we need to distance ourselves from limited circles. If we wish to grow faster, we need to bid farewell to friends who waste our time. Only when we streamline our social circle do we understand that not every circle benefits us, and not every friendship is worth deep connections. Learn to accept the unsatisfactory and appreciate the present moment. By simplifying the intricate, we grasp our remaining life. By focusing more on ourselves, our inner self becomes richer, and happiness follows suit.

Cherish Friendship, Maintain Connection

As the years go by, looking back, one realizes there aren’t many friends truly worthy of praise. Those false friendships have long faded with time.

After going through half a lifetime, only now have I come to understand that in this world, one should maintain connections; the bonds in our hearts should be cherished. The journey through most of life is not easy, not everyone can enter our lives, and not everyone is worthy of continuous contact.

Choose friends who stand the test of time and align with our values. The value of a friend lies in their quality, not quantity. One or two sincere friends who treat us genuinely are worth more than many insincere ones.

Having one confidant in life is more than enough. To become true friends to each other is indeed not easy.

Understanding Children, Maintaining Equanimity

Life is an ever-evolving journey, especially concerning the relationship with our children. As time passes, we grow old while they gradually mature.

They are no longer the unknowing children who needed our guidance. We must learn to let go, understand our children, comprehend the difficulties of their growth, and maintain a balanced mindset.

We shouldn’t interfere with our children’s choices but offer appropriate support. Understanding children requires acceptance. Maintaining equanimity is an act of wisdom.

May we preserve a balanced mindset, with fewer expectations and more tolerance. Let's smile at the future and treat the gradual aging process kindly.

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The Middle Ages: Unlocking Life's Most Magnificent Chapter

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The Middle Ages: Unlocking Life's Most Magnificent Chapter

Middle age usually refers to the midpoint in a person's life, roughly between 35 and 55 years old. This stage is often a period of experiencing various changes and challenges in both career and personal life. Some people consider middle age as the golden period of life because individuals might have established a career; possess some economic stability and family life, while also maintaining a certain level of energy and ambitions.

During the middle age phase, individuals might have more experience and wisdom, with more resources and opportunities to pursue personal goals. However, some responsibilities and pressures may increase, particularly from family, career, and financial aspects.

While some might feel content and balanced due to the maturity and stability of this phase, it's not the case for everyone. Each person's feelings and experiences of middle age vary due to the diversity of individual life circumstances and experiences.

During middle age, some individuals might re-evaluate their life goals and values, potentially reconfiguring their path, seeking more meaning and fulfilment. This period can also be a crucial stage for personal growth and development, prompting positive changes in their mental and physical health and lifestyle.

Reasonableness and understanding

Individuals likely have learned much from life and career experiences, leading to emotional and intellectual maturity. This maturity helps them better cope with daily life challenges and more rationally handle conflicts and issues.

During middle age, people generally comprehend and respect the feelings of others more, feeling a heightened sense of responsibility, considering family and society more. Their actions are more measured and deliberate to ensure their decisions and actions align with logic and reason. This trait of reasonableness makes them more adept at communicating, negotiating, and problem-solving in social and interpersonal relationships.

Moreover, middle-aged individuals might have more control and understanding of their emotions and feelings, aiding them in better balancing the various emotional challenges in life. This balanced approach of rationality and emotions typically helps maintain a stable and mature role within both work and family life.

Improve Skills

Middle age is often seen as a crucial stage in life, where people seek balance and strive to deal with various challenges. During this phase, individuals may have more responsibilities, including work, family, and social relationships. Improving skills can involve continually learning new skills, enhancing professional knowledge, and improving skill levels to adapt to the ever-changing environment. This may include expanding knowledge through educational courses, work experiences, and self-directed learning to enhance performance in the workplace.

In middle age, individuals might realize the need to continuously adapt to new technologies, trends, and changing workplace requirements. This indicates the necessity for lifelong learning and constant skill improvement to adapt to the evolving social and professional environment. Through ongoing learning and the development of new skills, an individual can attain greater success in their career. This might involve professional development, lifelong learning, and exploring new fields. Skill enhancement can provide better job opportunities, increase work efficiency, and improve job satisfaction. Additionally, it better prepares individuals to meet the rapidly changing demands of the workplace.

Moreover, improving skills also aids in personal development. It enhances confidence and helps to better understand personal interests and goals. Through continuous learning, an individual can develop their hobbies, improve social abilities, enhance creativity, and prepare for future challenges.

Overall, improving skills is a positive life attitude and a crucial approach to improving abilities in middle age to cope with life's challenges and changes. It also bestows greater confidence upon middle-aged individuals, enabling them to better navigate their career challenges and remain competitive in a fiercely competitive market.

Emotional Control

Emotional control is particularly critical during middle age. This phase might face challenges from career, family, and personal pressures, hence achieving emotional balance and management becomes vital. Managing emotions not only helps to handle stress but also enhances personal mental health and the quality of life for those around us.

Emotional management involves learning to recognize one's emotions and employing positive ways to deal with them. This might include seeking professional help, learning relaxation techniques, or using exercise to relieve stress. Developing positive emotional management skills can heighten self-awareness, promote inner calmness, improve relationships, and assist in better handling challenges and stress.

During middle age, emotional management also fortifies family relationships. Dealing with various pressures in the family, knowing how to control emotions can improve communication with partners and children, uplifting the overall family atmosphere.

Whether facing career challenges, family stress, or personal growth needs, more emotional intelligence is required. Emotional stability and handling methods become vital during this phase.

Emotional control entails understanding one's emotions, managing emotional fluctuations, and not allowing emotions to influence one when facing challenges. The key components include:

1. Emotion Recognition: Identifying emotions is fundamental to emotional intelligence. Understanding what emotions are and recognizing the situations that trigger specific emotions is crucial.
2. Emotional Management: Learning not to let negative emotions control oneself; this can be achieved through practices like meditation, relaxation, physical exercise, etc., to adjust one's emotional state.
3. Self-Control: Rational thinking is more important than emotional decisions in controlling emotions. Managing impulses and emotional outbursts is vital for maintaining calmness and rationality.
4. Communication Skills: Expressing one's emotions through effective communication while learning to listen and understand others' emotions.
5. Stress Management: Acquiring the skills to handle stress and finding suitable ways to de-stress, such as physical exercise, music, art, or engaging with family and friends.
6. Positive Mindset: Cultivating a positive way of thinking is crucial when facing challenges as it assists in approaching problems with greater optimism.
7. Professional Help: Seeking professional psychological counselling might be a beneficial choice when emotions are challenging to control or emotional issues arise.

Mastering emotional control requires continuous practice and self-reflection. Not only does it improve life quality, but it also enhances the performance of middle-aged individuals in their work, family, and social relationships.

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Beyond the Bank Account: The Deepest Middle-Age Sorrows

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Beyond the Bank Account: The Deepest Middle-Age Sorrows

Middle age can bring about complex emotions and anxieties, and one of the main sorrows is that even though they've achieved a certain level of success in their careers and might have attained a certain level of material wealth; they still feel a sense of inner emptiness and lack. This kind of sorrow can originate from inner quests and reflections. Wealth and a sense of achievement often cannot fill the inner void. Past aspirations might not have met expectations, and uncertainties about the future and life after retirement can bring about unease.

Additionally, middle age is often accompanied by family responsibilities, such as taking care of aging parents or raising children, which adds pressure, making individuals feel more squeezed and anxious. As age advances, physical changes and concerns about health can also be worrisome.

Moreover, middle age is a period for self-reflection, which might lead to confusion and regret about past choices and the direction of life. This self-reflection and quest for the meaning of life can trigger a kind of inner pain and anxiety, leaving individuals feeling emotionally empty and lost.

Inner Emptiness

The inner emptiness experienced by middle-aged individuals can stem from various factors, such as life changes, shifts in family responsibilities, the pursuit of meaning and fulfilment, personal stress, and societal expectations. Let's delve deeper into these factors:

1. Change and Loss: Middle-aged individuals might face changes like retiring from a career, children growing up, or the loss of loved ones. These changes lead them to lose what was once the focus of their lives, causing confusion and emptiness.
2. Diminished Family Responsibilities: With children reaching adulthood, the reduction in family responsibilities might leave middle-aged individuals feeling adrift without a central focus in life.
3. Quest for Meaning: Middle-aged individuals often begin to contemplate the meaning of life and their personal values. Many might feel empty as they lack a clear understanding of their life goals and values.
4. Psychological Stress and Anxiety: Reassessing one's success and achievements, especially in comparison to societal and personal expectations, might lead to psychological stress and anxiety.
5. Societal Expectations: Some cultures view middle-aged individuals as a stage of career success and stable family life. Inability to meet these expectations can result in feelings of emptiness and loss.

The inner feeling of emptiness resulting from these factors may have an impact on the emotions and psychological state of middle-aged individuals. Therefore, recognizing and dealing with these emotions correctly is crucial in helping them overcome the sense of inner emptiness.

Middle age might be accompanied by a sense of inner emptiness. Here are some suggestions for overcoming the inner emptiness that comes with middle age:

1. Reignite passion: Explore new hobbies or interests, such as engaging in art, volunteering, or learning new skills. These activities can reignite passion.
2. Build a social circle: Maintain contact with friends and family, engage in social activities. Attending gatherings, events, or joining interest groups can reduce feelings of loneliness.
3. Seek psychological support: Talk to a counsellor or therapist. Having someone to confide in can be a good way to alleviate inner stress.
4. Exercise: Physical activity releases chemicals like dopamine and endorphins, aiding in mood improvement.
5. Focus on personal growth: Set clear goals and plans, whether in the workplace, personal development, or learning. The process of growth and the progress achieved can fill the void.
6. Find inner peace: Learn meditation or relaxation techniques. This can help soothe inner anxieties and unease.
7. Acknowledge oneself: Value achievements and experiences while accepting one's shortcomings. Self-esteem is the first step in dispelling inner emptiness.
8. Challenge oneself: Set new goals and achieve them gradually. Challenging oneself helps maintain vitality and motivation.

Hopefully, these suggestions will help alleviate the sense of inner emptiness that might arise in middle age. Different people have different ways of dealing with these feelings, so finding the right approach for oneself is crucial.

Health

Middle age is an important stage in life, and the maintenance and management of health are crucial. During middle age, individuals might face various health challenges. Lifestyle choices become more critical, including dietary habits, exercise, and mental health. Maintaining a balanced diet and moderate exercise are paramount for overall health. Additionally, regular check-ups and communication with healthcare providers are essential in early detection of potential health issues.

Simultaneously, mental health is equally crucial. Middle-aged individuals may encounter increased stress from work, family, and anxiety about future plans, which can impact emotional and psychological well-being. Therefore, learning relaxation and self-care techniques is crucial, such as meditation, reading, exercise, engaging in art, and spending time with family and friends.

To maintain health in middle age, attention must be given to the balance between physical and mental health. It's not just about physical well-being; mental and emotional health are equally significant because health is a comprehensive concept that encompasses the individual’s physical, mental, and social well-being.

Dreams

Middle age is a period to re-evaluate life and dreams. Many people begin to reconsider their goals and dreams during this phase to ensure a richer and more meaningful life.

Some might seek personal growth and learn new skills. This could involve exploring new hobbies, learning a new language, pursuing further education, or reigniting interests once set aside in their youth.

For others, middle age is a time to review career and family objectives. They may begin to pursue more meaningful careers or prioritize family harmony and happiness.

Some individuals may redirect their focus towards traveling and exploration, seeking broader horizons and discovering new cultures and landscapes.

In middle age, dreams are not limited to personal development alone. They encompass expectations and aspirations for family, career, and the world. This is a period to redefine life goals and meanings.

The Importance of Middle-Aged Dreams lies in representing an individual's deep inner pursuits and values. These dreams can offer motivation and guidance, making life feel more meaningful and worth pursuing. Here's why middle-aged dreams are significant:

1. Guiding Life's Direction: Middle-aged dreams are the goals and visions individuals set for their desired and aspired future. They can guide a person's direction in life and serve as markers for personal growth.
2. Inspiration and Drive: Having dreams can inspire internal drive, urging individuals to continually seek growth and improvement. They can be a driving force for personal success and fulfilment.
3. Psychological Fulfilment: Achieving middle-aged dreams can bring internal satisfaction and happiness. Whether it's learning new skills, exploring through travel, caring for family, or attaining financial security, realizing these dreams can provide a sense of fulfilment and accomplishment.
4. Fostering Personal Growth: Middle-aged dreams contribute to higher levels of personal growth, constantly pushing individuals to exceed themselves. By pursuing these dreams, people can continue learning, developing skills, and broadening their experiences.
5. Shaping Life Values: Realizing dreams can help individuals understand themselves more clearly, defining their values and objectives, which positively impacts both the individual and their family.

In conclusion, middle-aged dreams are a crucial part of life. They provide direction, inspiration, and impetus, serving as vital sources for personal growth and psychological fulfilment.

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Crafting a Better 'You'

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Crafting a Better 'You'

Life is a process of self-cultivation. Striving to improve yourself is never too late, no matter when you begin. Here are five ways to change yourself, and by adhering to just two points, you can witness a significant transformation:

1. Improve Health Through Exercise

Have you ever experienced this: climbing a few flights of stairs leaves you gasping for breath when the elevator malfunctions; a short walk outside results in exhaustion, requiring you to sit down and rest after just a few steps? Catching a slight chill easily, making you unable to cope. Many joke that they are "less agile in the upper body and less enduring in the lower body," some are even afraid to undergo a physical examination and read their medical reports.

Somewhere along the way, we've all become part of the "sub-healthy" population: our limbs are inflexible, prone to illness, and constantly fatigued.

As the saying goes: "Water that does not flow becomes stagnant, and a door that does not open gets dust." The human body also needs to move.

Sweat and footfalls will stir the energy in your body. Regular visits to the gym will gradually restore your body's various indicators to normal; practicing yoga every day will not only relax your muscles and bones but also bring a sense of inner calm and clarity to your mind.

Exercise is not just a source of health but also a secret to longevity. Exercise is the key to unlocking a better life. Even when busy, don’t forget to keep your body active.

It doesn't require too much time; half an hour of exercise daily will change your life.

2. Transforming Appearance through Discipline

What changes could you make in 30 days with high discipline? A middle-aged stay-at-home guy, wanting to improve his greasy appearance, embarked on a 30-day "remodelling plan":

In these 30 days, he commuted by bicycle, walked 10,000 steps every day, and gave up sugar.

After a month, his belly disappeared, his body became toned, and he exuded a new vitality.

Thirty days of high discipline made him feel rejuvenated.

He proved through his own experience: discipline is the best way to shape one's external image.

"A person's appearance reflects their disciplined way of life and pursuit of life. Spend some time each day grooming yourself; a neat appearance multiplies self-confidence. Allocate time to read more books, subtly elevating one's overall temperament. Manage your posture properly to say goodbye to greasiness and rekindle your youthful style. A good external appearance is the best adornment for life, and those who take themselves seriously will attain a better destiny."

Few are naturally gifted with perfect looks, but discipline can help everyone create a better version of themselves.

Appearance and temperament form the first impression one gives.

Without words or actions, your appearance speaks for you.

By shaping your appearance through discipline, you'll lead a unique life.

3. Improving Relationships with Sincerity

"Only by sincerely caring for others can you touch their hearts. While we seem to care for others, in the end, we're also taking care of ourselves."

Interpersonal relationships are always mutual; only sincerity can beget sincerity.

Be sincere to people, and they'll be less wary; be reliable in your actions, and people will trust you.

There's no shortcut to sincerity; sincerity is the path itself.

If you see a friend in trouble, don't give insincere gestures; make every effort to help, and you'll gain more genuine friendship. In business dealings, don't play cunning tricks; approach cooperation with an altruistic heart, and eventually, you'll benefit too.

Deep down, everyone yearns for genuine connections with others.

No one willingly endures insincere relationships.

In this world, lasting collaborations are never maintained through acting.

By enhancing relationships through sincerity, we feel the tenderness of the world

4. Enhancing Abilities through Learning

Someone once asked, "How does one become useless?" Someone offered a straightforward answer:

All you need to do is give them internet, a mobile phone, and the contact numbers of a few food delivery riders.

Being lazy and idle is too easy. What's truly challenging is breaking out of your comfort zone and not becoming complacent.

The only way to step out of the comfort zone is through active learning and exploring the unknown.

In economics, there's a concept called "marginal benefit." If you learn an extra 1% every day, in 365 days, your abilities will improve 37 times. Reading more books broadens your perspectives and enhances your thinking skills; learning a new skill enriches your life and enhances your employability; seeking advice from experienced individuals expands your social circle and hones your communication skills. Do not underestimate these cumulative actions - over time, they will bring you tremendous surprises.

We often lament the unpredictable changes and cut-throat competition in our times. To avoid being eliminated, we try various methods. However, we ultimately find that improving our abilities is the best way to face challenges.

In nature, there's a fierce fish, highly powerful with hardly any natural enemies. It has over 500 teeth, constantly replacing 3% of its old teeth daily to grow sharp new ones. It's this powerful self-evolution that makes the fish the mightiest hunter in the ocean.

In real life, we also need to follow the jungle law of the "survival of the fittest." Yet, there's no need to fear. As long as we continue learning and evolving, we can adapt to various life environments.

5. Character

Our internal qualities create opportunities for us and lead to wealth. Holding an umbrella for someone might shelter you in a storm; lighting up someone's darkness might illuminate your path.

Everything has cause and effect. What you do for others will reciprocate to you at some point.

An unintentional kind thought or act might be an opportunity to change fate. Kindness is the best identity one can have in the world.

Persist in being a kind person, and you will never lose out.

Life is like a miniature sculpture, and the chisel is in your hands. Exchange health through exercise, elevate your temperament through discipline, nurture relationships through sincerity, enhance abilities through learning, and shape life through character.

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Unveiling the Unspoken: 15 Truths of Society

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