Sudden Realizations

Some say that life is like a journey filled with numerous trials. It's akin to a stone tumbling into a stream, initially with sharp edges, but over time, as it's worn down by the water's flow, it loses its edges, becoming smoother and rounder.

This process might be filled with pain, yet it's the path to growth. As days go by, the seasons change. After experiencing many things, we suddenly understand.

About Life

Suddenly, I understand: Living healthily, peacefully, happily, and being moderately busy is already good enough. Everyone will face a dark period. During those days, we endure tremendous pressure. It might be long-term efforts that didn't achieve our goals; or giving a lot but not getting recognition; or having well-thought-out ideas but not receiving family understanding. Many things bind us, making us feel tired. However, life is like this; many times, things don’t go as we wish. Perhaps, for some time, life might feel incredibly challenging, with no hope in sight. But as the saying goes: "Do your best, try your hardest, and then let fate decide." When one path is blocked, take another; when a problem is hard to grasp, change your mindset to solve it. After one experiences all the darkness, they’ll realize the difficulties once thought of were not worth worrying about.

Don’t look like you can't handle a little pressure. Don't feel that the future is dark because of a little uncertainty. Don't be disheartened by a setback. In this life, there will inevitably be wrong paths, hardships, setbacks, and traps, and not one will be missing. Persist, get through, move on, and good fortune will naturally come. Living healthily, peacefully, happily, and being moderately busy is already good. In the years to come, may you adjust your mindset, go with the flow, and not let life's pressures burden your life.

About Life Pace

Suddenly, I understand: Each person's life pace is different, and there's no need to be anxious because others got something ahead of us. Have you ever felt like this: throughout our lives, we’re always being chased by the relentless flow of time. In our teens, we fret about academic achievement, and if a classmate scores a bit higher, we rush to study harder; In our twenties, we fret about work and marriage, hastily entering matrimony upon seeing friends married; In our thirties, we fret about children and houses, scrimping while spending significantly on kids' classes and juggling mortgage payments, longing for a bigger home; In our forties, we fret about unemployment, diligently working while pondering side businesses to boost income. Many people spend their entire lives in frenzy, always feeling anxious. They never get the chance to leisurely enjoy the beauty of the world, savouring the bloom and withering, the ebb and flow of clouds. But this kind of life is just too exhausting. One should understand that everyone's pace of life is different.

About Own Pace

Some take 3 minutes for instant noodles; others spend 3 hours making soup. While someone's takeout has arrived at their doorstep, another has just finished chopping garlic and meat. At the barbecue stall, the quickest to be ready is the cucumber dish, and in some buns, the first bite might lack meat. Choose the path you believe is right and proceed with determination, free from unnecessary thoughts. Everyone's pace in life is different; no need to be anxious because someone got something ahead of you. Rather than worrying all day, remain calm, and follow your own rhythm. Take a moment, complete what you should do, be practical, and take one step at a time. The efforts you put in during March and April will naturally yield answers in August and September.

About Love

Suddenly, I understand: Love should be a process that helps each other become better, not mutual depletion. There was a topic asking: "What grievances have you experienced in love?" The comments were quite heart-wrenching. Some went through arduous paths to see someone but received only coldness and indifference. Others meticulously sacrificed, yet all they got was the other's intense demands. Some were treated as invaluable while cherishing their partners as treasures. And others, despite being genuine partners, never appeared in the other's social circles, as if they were a secret lover.

Have you also lost yourself in love and gradually become someone else?

Haruki Murakami once said: "I have the thought of leaving you. It’s not because you're bad, nor that I don’t love you anymore. It's just that the way you treat me makes me feel your world doesn't lack my presence. I could choose to cling to you desperately, but it's pointless. When I'm with you, I become worse, bringing out my weaknesses, impatience, jealousy, and insecurity, evoking the worst side of my character. Therefore, instead of draining each other, it's better to let go. If in a relationship, all you feel is grievances and unhappiness, it's better to let go. A good love should be two people facing life's tests side by side, not making you lose your passion and belief in life. This life is long; there may be many challenges in the future, but being with someone truly in love can help hold up an umbrella against the storms life bring."

May you learn to reconcile with life in the future, without pressuring yourself too much or overanxious, and not sacrifice yourself for someone who doesn't genuinely love you. Let the past fade away and don't worry too much about gains and losses.

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Reflections: To Myself Gradually Growing Old

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