Showing posts with label money. Show all posts
Showing posts with label money. Show all posts

Friday, September 26, 2025

Savings Essentials: Three Must-Have Accounts

Saving money can be a daunting task for many ordinary people. Faced with various living expenses and unexpected situations, many people often feel overwhelmed. However, through proper financial planning and setting up appropriate accounts, saving money can also become simple and effective.

1.Daily Expenses Account: Managing Daily Expenditure

The daily expenses account is the foundation of a savings plan. This account is used to pay for daily living expenses such as rent, utilities, groceries, transportation, etc. The purpose of setting up this account is to ensure that your basic living needs are met while avoiding unnecessary expenses.

To effectively manage the daily expenses account, you can take the following measures:

a.Budgeting: Create a budget plan based on your income and living needs. Ensure that the budget covers all necessary expenses and leaves some room for unexpected situations.

b.Expense Tracking: Use budgeting apps or physical notebooks to record every expenditure in detail. This will help you understand your spending habits and identify unnecessary expenses for adjustment.

c.Setting Limits: Set a limit for the daily expenses account to ensure that you don't overspend. When the account balance approaches the limit, remind yourself to control spending.

By managing the daily expenses account effectively, you can better control your expenses and lay a solid foundation for your savings plan.

2.Emergency Reserve Account: Dealing with Emergencies

The emergency reserve account is an indispensable part of a savings plan. This account is used to deal with unexpected events such as unemployment, illness, accidents, etc. Having sufficient emergency funds allows you to stay calm in the face of difficulties and avoid making irrational decisions due to economic pressure.

To establish an effective emergency reserve account, you can consider the following suggestions:

a.Determine the Reserve Amount: Determine a reasonable reserve amount based on your personal situation and family needs. Generally, it is recommended to reserve at least 3-6 months of living expenses.

b.Automatic Savings: Set up an automatic savings plan to transfer a certain amount to the emergency reserve account every month. This ensures that you don't overlook the accumulation of emergency funds due to forgetfulness or other reasons.

c.Avoid Misappropriation: Keep the emergency reserve account separate from other accounts and avoid using it for daily expenses or other non-emergency situations. This ensures the safety and availability of emergency funds.

By establishing an emergency reserve account, you can provide yourself and your family with an economic safety net and reduce the economic pressure brought by unexpected events.

3.Investment Appreciation Account: Making Money Work for You

In addition to daily expenses and emergency reserves accounts, an investment appreciation account is also an important part of a savings plan. This account is used for investment and financial management to generate additional income and increase wealth.

For ordinary people, an investment appreciation account may be a relatively unfamiliar area. Here are some suggestions to help you better manage this account:

a.Learn Investment Knowledge: Before investing, understand basic investment knowledge and risk management methods. This can help you make wiser investment decisions and avoid blind following or risky investments.

b.Diversified Investment: Diversify your funds by investing in different sectors and asset classes to reduce risk. For example, you can invest in stocks, bonds, funds, and other investment products simultaneously.

c.Long-term Investment: The longer you hold investment products, the more likely you are to achieve stable returns. Therefore, it is recommended to view investment as a long-term activity and avoid frequent buying and selling or chasing market trends.

d.Regular Evaluation: Regularly assess the performance of your investment portfolio and the market environment, and make adjustments as needed. This helps you stay focused on and manage your investment accounts to ensure the achievement of investment goals.

By managing the investment appreciation account properly, you can make your money work for you and increase your wealth. However, please note that investment involves risks, so be sure to invest based on an understanding of your risk tolerance and investment goals.

In conclusion, saving money is not an unattainable goal. Saving money is a long-term process that requires patience and perseverance. With proper financial planning and management, believe that you can accumulate your own wealth.

Read Also:

Wealth Indicators: 4 Middle-Age Milestones

Listen: Podcast

Friday, August 29, 2025

"Laziness is your body's best signal."

In life, I've found that many people who aren't doing well often encounter this dilemma: they have many ideas, but their motivation always lags behind. They often have many things they want to do, always ambitious and making many plans, but in the end, they fail to complete them for various reasons. Over time, people become frustrated and lack confidence. Some even feel like they're just lazy, destined to waste their lives. In fact, motivation is the key factor that sets people apart. On a smaller scale, it affects the achievement of one or two things; on a larger scale, if motivation cannot keep up in the long run, people will develop self-doubt and become more self-conscious and withdrawn in the face of repeated setbacks. We usually think that the strength of motivation depends on willpower and perseverance, and those without motivation are simply lazy.

But in psychology, the key to improving motivation lies in building good relationships, which involves two aspects:

1. Relationship with tasks;

2. Relationship with oneself. A person who always lacks motivation may not necessarily have a problem with themselves but because they haven't built good relationships.

1.Relationship with tasks: Why do you want to change?

"Building good relationships" may sound abstract at first, but it's actually closely related to our lives. I once had an interesting job: providing psychological support for people trying to lose weight. In my daily work, I needed to understand their emotional state, progress in weight loss, and effectiveness, etc. After a while, I found that I had inadvertently acquired a skill: predicting whether someone would succeed in losing weight (with an accuracy rate of about 80%). I didn't need to know their physical indicators but to understand their motivations for losing weight. I would ask everyone the same question: what happened that made you decide to lose weight? Different answers reflect different understandings of weight loss. The first two types of people have the shallowest understanding of weight loss and are just making impulsive decisions. This means that there is only a weak connection between them and the goal of "losing weight," and the motivation they can stimulate is also very limited. So, it's easy to become enthusiastic for a short time, but once the initial excitement wears off, it becomes difficult to have motivation again. The third situation is slightly better. Some older friends who are in poor health often suffer from illness and hope to lose weight to become healthy and reduce pain. This means that their connection with "losing weight" will be deeper, and they will have more motivation to keep going. Therefore, even though their metabolism is lower and losing weight is more difficult, because their motivation is stronger, their motivation is also stronger, and they are more likely to succeed. Of course, this motivation is still not the highest, after all, they are urged to lose weight by a doctor. However, it's easy to see that the degree of motivation shown by different degrees of connection with the goal will be completely different.

2.The strongest motivation comes from the deepest relationships

In fact, weight loss is like a metaphor for many things in life. We often make many plans, such as reading, taking exams, going to bed and getting up early, eating a balanced diet, learning new skills, etc. Everyone knows that these things are "good" and worth doing, but when it comes to action, they find themselves with more will than strength. That's because the understanding of "good" at this time only stays at the level of the mind and lacks experience. Conversely, when a person has a deep understanding and experience of what they are doing, they can generate tremendous motivation.

Once, I met a lady named Lee, who showed amazing execution in losing weight. In her past life, she had always been chubby and had never seriously tried to lose weight. But after starting a strict exercise and diet plan, she hardly ever missed a day and rarely complained. I was curious why she was so good at it, so Lee shared her experience with me. All along, her attitude towards life had been perfunctory; she just got by at work, wasn't invested in relationships, and handled conflicts with her boyfriend coldly. She never thought there would be any problem with this. Until last year, she was suddenly fired from her job and broke up. The two blows struck her suddenly like lightning, and she realized the problem and felt unprecedented pain. Lee wanted to change, but she felt powerless and felt a huge sense of powerlessness and loss of control. Just when she was feeling hopeless, she accidentally ran into a high school friend she hadn't seen in years. In her memory, her friend was just like her, chubby, timid, and lacking in confidence. But now, her friend had almost completely changed. Not only had she become thinner, but she also seemed confident in her speech and demeanor, appearing poised and confident in everything she did. Lee deeply admired her friend's state, and her friend shared how she had changed little by little. Lee listened intently and also had a thought in her heart: maybe I can change myself and take control of my life. Not long after, Lee celebrated her 30th birthday and made a wish: to change herself and take back control of her life. One of the first things she did was to take control of her weight. For Lee, losing weight was not just about becoming beautiful and healthy, but also about helping herself overcome the anxiety of losing control and regain confidence. Therefore, she had an extremely deep connection with the goal of losing weight, which naturally kept her motivated. Lee’s state has since improved, making others envious. So, is it certain that as long as you establish a deep relationship with what you are doing, you can persist? Not necessarily.

Because there is another influencing factor: the relationship with oneself.

3.Relationship with oneself: Is change motivated by "self-love" or "self-hatred"?

Observing those around you, you will find that many people are indeed determined to do something but still procrastinate or even give up halfway. The reason is that they often do things in a state of "self-hatred." You may feel puzzled: isn't growth and change about making oneself better, isn't it "self-love"? Not necessarily! Sharing a personal experience: At the end of last year, I resumed my habit of running, but before that, I had procrastinated on running for almost half a year. I often encountered situations where I would set my alarm clock the night before to remind myself to get up early to run, but the next day, I often woke up but didn't want to get out of bed. Or, I would finally go out, but after running for less than 10 minutes, I wanted to give up. Why would this happen? Later, I realized that it was because I would set a series of invisible high goals for myself, such as: I must start running at 6:30; I must run more than 3 kilometers continuously; I can't run too slowly... These goals may seem ordinary, but for someone like me who was used to sleeping late and hadn't exercised for a long time, they were actually quite difficult. Why would I set such high goals? Later, I realized a deeper truth: because I didn't like myself. During that time, I was very dissatisfied with myself, thinking that I was performing poorly in all aspects of work and life. Therefore, I hated to see this annoying self and wanted to change immediately. Therefore, when setting goals, I wasn't considering whether the goal could be achieved but was immersed in a state of self-disgust, setting unrealistic goals. Deep down, I would think: only by reaching such high standards can I prove that I'm not bad, and only then can I be satisfied with myself. However, unrealistic goals only bring continuous setbacks. I would become irritated by small things. For example, if I woke up late or ran slowly, I would judge and deny myself: "Why am I so bad!" And the subconscious mind tends to seek benefit and avoid harm. When running each time meant enduring the pain of criticism, unconsciously, I would become procrastinated. After all, as long as I didn't do it, I wouldn't have to face the bloody setbacks. Therefore, in an atmosphere of self-disgust, people are destined to become exhausted when doing things, and naturally, motivation will decrease.

4.When motivation is lacking, it is even more important to love oneself

Indeed, when changing, people often have both feelings of "self-love" and "self-hatred," but be careful not to let the latter dominate. Careful observation will reveal that many people seemingly set positive and upward growth goals, but many of them are venting their dissatisfaction with themselves by setting high goals. For example, some people change their profile pictures to "won't change until I lose ten pounds," or make a New Year's resolution to "read a book a week"... These goals not only are difficult to achieve, leading to self-doubt, but they also disrupt the rhythm of action. And many people are addicted to self-blame because of the influence of wrong ideas, thinking that the more cruel and demanding they are to themselves, the better they will become. But that's not true. While self-blame can sometimes generate short-term motivation, fundamentally, it's a state of being hostile to oneself, which only consumes energy in self-struggle. Therefore, to obtain sustainable motivation, we need to change our relationship with ourselves. Later, through continuous awareness and adjustment, I redeveloped the habit of running and summarized three steps. If you encounter similar difficulties, you may want to try it.

a.See the real self

Bad relationships often stick to "as I wish," while good relationships accept things "as they are." The former disregards the actual situation and focuses solely on that ideal goal, while the latter sees and accepts the true self. I remind myself: although life may not be going well right now, and I haven't exercised in a long time, planning to start moving now is already good. It's inevitable that I can't run or run slowly at this time. When I think like this, my self-blame decreases, and I can see a few things about myself that are worthy of praise. In fact, everyone is like this. Behind the dissatisfaction with oneself also means that we are in a trough, and the difficulty of change is the greatest at this time. But we are still determined to salvage ourselves, and this intention alone is worthy of affirmation and recognition. When we can realize this, self-acceptance will increase, and the insistence on high goals will decrease.

Lower the goal and rebuild the "relationship" I remind myself: now, my main task is to reduce psychological burden and find a way to make running a less stressful activity for me. So, I readjusted the goal of running, focusing not on how fast or how far to run but setting a minimum standard: to go out. As long as I run, I achieve my goal, and that is a victory. Therefore, my stress was minimized, and I successfully turned running into a habit. Actually, when you find it difficult to act, you might as well lower the standard, get yourself moving, and continue before there's a chance for progress.

b.The worse the performance, the more support you need for yourself

Later, when my running state recovered, I could run more than 8 kilometers each time, and my requirements for myself also unknowingly increased. But once, perhaps because my condition was really bad, it took me 30 minutes to "run" just 3 kilometers. This is a very slow pace, and at first, I felt embarrassed and didn't want to post on social media. But then I realized: am I running to prove it to others? Of course not, I'm doing it for myself. At the same time, even if I perform poorly, I accept this imperfect self. When I think like this, I don't feel defeated but feel a kind of power connected to myself. I am no longer an enemy with myself but a friend fighting side by side.

In conclusion

Actually, when you find yourself always having the will but lacking the strength, don't rush to doubt or deny yourself. Those things that have shallow connections with yourself don't have to be forced, try doing goals that you are more willing to do first. And on the road to growth, everyone will have moments of poor performance. The more difficult the time, the more we need to avoid adding insult to injury to ourselves, support and understand ourselves more. Only then can we rebuild our relationship and truly improve our motivation.

Read Also:

The Money Magnet

Listen: Podcast

Friday, August 15, 2025

Leading by Example

I've always believed: there are no subordinates who can't be managed well, only leaders who don't know how to manage.

Ultimately, management is about two things: managing people and managing tasks.

If people aren't managed well, problems arise; if tasks aren't managed well, failure follows.

How to manage people and tasks? It boils down to eight words: manage people steadily, manage tasks accurately.

Let's explore this together today.

01 Don't overly concern yourself with others' attitudes

What does managing people steadily mean? It means not being impatient, not being afraid, and not losing face.

When managing people, we inevitably encounter various problems. For example, subordinates may be growing too slowly and not meeting expectations, or they may not respect you, lack motivation in their work, and quit at the slightest disagreement.

At such times, you must remain steady. The key is to remain unhurried, unafraid, and unashamed.

1.Remain unhurried

Almost all management problems stem from people issues. When managing people, avoid rushing for quick results.

Because once you rush for quick results, you're prone to overlook the natural growth process of talent, resort to crude methods, and often end up with unsatisfactory outcomes.

Rome wasn't built in a day; you need patience and timing.

So, don't be in a hurry. Do what you need to do, wait patiently, some flowers bloom slowly on their own, and some things gradually fall into place; you must have patience.

2.Don't be afraid

What do managers fear? One is the fear of conflicts within the team, and the other is the fear of employees making mistakes.

Some managers fear conflicts with subordinates. They always say "okay" no matter what the subordinates do, and agree to whatever requests the subordinates make. They never have their own bottom line and always compromise.

Managers grow through conflicts, not harmony. If you always seek harmony, your subordinates won't respect you, and no one will listen to you, making it impossible to manage the team well.

Some managers are also afraid that subordinates will make mistakes, resulting in low efficiency. To get results faster, they may end up doing the work themselves.

However, if a subordinate never makes mistakes, they may not be doing anything at the company.

Procter & Gamble even has a rule: if an employee goes three months without making a mistake, they are considered an unsatisfactory employee.

So, don't be afraid of subordinates making mistakes; give them the opportunity to make mistakes. Because only then will they learn from their mistakes and grow.

Of course, if someone keeps making mistakes and refuses to learn, you don't need to be afraid; you can persuade them with reason, encourage them with incentives, and if all else fails, take disciplinary action.

3.Don't be ashamed

Losing face means being able to set aside your ego and not overly concern yourself with others' attitudes.

When managing people, don't be afraid to offend anyone. If a subordinate makes a mistake, stick to your principles and point out the issue firmly, rather than trying to cover it up to save face.

Be willing to speak frankly, lead with the ugly truth, explain the consequences of failing to meet objectives, and urge the team to stay committed to the goals.

And during the process of managing tasks, also supervise execution rigorously, correct processes, evaluate results, and make rewards and punishments clear. Replace or dismiss those who are not up to standard.

By being "unhurried, unafraid, and unashamed," you can elevate your management to a higher level.

02 Managing tasks accurately ensures results.

1.Focus on the big picture

Focusing on the big picture means prioritizing major tasks, focusing on the most important things.

Some managers don't do this; they usually try to handle everything at once, ending up busier and less efficient, which is essentially being busy for the sake of it.

According to the Pareto Principle, the most important things account for only 20%, while the remaining 80%, although the majority, are not actually crucial.

So, you only need to focus on the big tasks, the key points.

The so-called big tasks are those that have a significant impact on the results. To judge the importance of a task, you must think deeply, identify the main contradictions, and understand the essence of the matter.

2.Delegate authority

Delegating authority means empowerment. Some tasks don't require you to do them yourself; you can delegate them to the right people.

Which tasks can be delegated? A good reference is whether the task or project will be affected if you're not involved.

So, what kind of subordinates should you delegate authority to? It mainly depends on two factors:

First, whether they can do it. To successfully complete the work, you need to find someone among your subordinates who are skilled and experienced enough to deliver results.

Second, whether they are willing to do it. Capability is one thing, but willingness is another. If someone is capable but unwilling, don't force them.

If they're capable and willing, they will continue to be self-driven, constantly seeking solutions to problems.

It's important to note that while delegating authority, you should also learn to mitigate risks. Mitigating risks means following up on the process, providing timely help and support, acting as a coach rather than a supervisor.

3.Pay attention to details

Paying attention to details means focusing on critical junctures, important details, and areas where results can be achieved; you must see things through to the end.

Paying attention to detail means being able to conduct checks on areas where mistakes may occur.

By focusing on the big picture, delegating authority, and paying attention to detail, managing tasks accurately ensures results.

03 In conclusion, management is about two things: managing people and managing tasks.

Managing people requires steadiness - not being in a hurry, not being afraid, and not losing face. Managing tasks requires accuracy - focusing on the big picture, delegating authority, and paying attention to detail, seeing things through to the end.

Read Also:

Life is Like Watching Drama

Listen: Podcast

Friday, April 11, 2025

Money Magic: 10 Thrifty Tricks to Try Today

"Saving money is truly a case where the earlier you start, the greater the benefits! This way, you can start enjoying the compounding effects of interest and time sooner. For example, if you save $25,000 every year, even if you start at the age of 30, with an interest rate of 3%, you can still accumulate $1 million by the age of 60. But if you start saving at 50, to achieve the same $1 million, you would need to save around $100,000 annually, significantly diminishing the benefits of compounding interest.

Understanding the importance of saving early is one thing, but what if you're always living paycheck to paycheck and can't seem to save any money? Today, we'll share 10 money-saving techniques to help you save 'painlessly' and become addicted to saving more and more."

1. Beginner-Level Money-Saving Methods

Countdown 30 Days Method

Suitable for: Teenagers, students, beginners

Method: Save $30 on the 1st of each month, $29 on the 2nd, decreasing sequentially until you save $1 on the 30th. By the end of the month, you'll have saved $465, totalling $5,580 annually."

 

52-Week Money Challenge

Suitable for: Those living paycheck to paycheck, students, new professionals, novice investors, financial beginners

Method: Save $10 in the first week, $20 in the second week, and increase by $10 each week. By the 52nd week, save $520. Since there are 52 weeks in a year, you can save a total of $13,780 annually."

 

10% Mandatory Savings Method

Suitable for: Those living paycheck to paycheck, students, low-income earners, people who find saving money painful

Method: After receiving your monthly salary, mandatory save 10% in a separate account. This percentage can be adjusted according to your situation, starting from 5% if necessary. The key is to develop a habit of saving money painlessly."

 

Six-Jar Money Management Method

Suitable for: Students, professionals, financial beginners

Method: The 'jars' can be metaphorical or actual separate accounts, divided as follows:

Financial Freedom Account: 10%

Education Account: 10%

Living Expenses Account: 55%

Long-Term Savings Account: 10%

Play Account: 10%

Gift Account: 5%

 

Weekly Money Savings Method

Suitable for: Students, professionals

Method: Save $10 on Monday, $20 on Tuesday, increasing incrementally until you save $70 on Sunday. This way, you can save $280 per week, totalling $14,560 annually."

 

2. Advanced Money-Saving Methods

 

365-Day Money Challenge

Suitable for: Anyone

Method: Save $1 on the first day, $2 on the second day, increasing by $1 each day.

By the 365th day, save $365, totalling $66,795 for the entire year."

 

333 Money Allocation Method

Suitable for: Anyone

Method: Divide your monthly income into three parts for expenses, savings, and investment. The proportions can be adjusted according to your situation, such as 333, 631, 532, etc."

 

1234 Money Allocation Method

Suitable for: Those with some financial literacy

Method: Divide your income into four parts, adjusting the proportions based on your situation:

Money to Spend: 10%

Emergency Fund: 20%

Money to Make Money: 30%

Principal Savings: 40%

 

Staggered Savings Method

Suitable for: Those with relatively high savings

Method: Purchase different term fixed deposits in descending order with your savings, dividing your funds into three parts. Save $10,000 in a one-year fixed deposit, $20,000 in a two-year fixed deposit, and $30,000 in a three-year fixed deposit. After each deposit matures, renew it as a three-year fixed deposit. In this way, after two years, all three portions of your funds will be in three-year fixed deposits."

 

Snowball Savings Method

Suitable for: Those with some savings

Method: Set aside a fixed amount of money each year, such as $30,000 to 50,000, for five years. Then forget about this money and let it automatically accumulate interest in your account. Just like a snowball rolling downhill, it will grow bigger and bigger."

"No savings, no future. Savings act as our safety net, allowing us to face illnesses, unemployment, or unexpected events with more ease. It's also the path to achieving our ideal lifestyle. Accumulating wealth starts with saving every small amount of money. As Bill Gates said, 'Saving is one of the keys to success; it allows you to have more control over your life.' May our wallets grow fatter, and may we live confidently and expectantly."

Read Also:

Do you own all six types of wealth?

Listen: Podcast

Friday, January 3, 2025

Wealth Indicators: 4 Middle-Age Milestones

As the year-end approaches, people always like to summarize the year. What have they accomplished this year, and what goals have they not yet achieved? At the beginning of the year, they are more enthusiastic about setting new goals. Regardless of whether they will take action, goals should still be set. What if they are achieved?

2024 just passed, some people lament that they haven't done anything yet, while others have reaped a lot. If you want to "restart your life" in the new year and make your future self grateful for your present self, then you need to start from this moment: refuse to slack off and plan ahead. 2025 has just begun, and how you spend it is entirely up to you.

1.Health is wealth.

A former colleague posted on social media: "In 2024, the place I visited most often was the hospital. Whether it was flu, cold, or any other virus, I caught them all. Each time, it cost me not only physical discomfort but also enough money to travel to hospital several times. So, taking care of your health is the top priority for 2025."

Many people reach middle age with little money and lots of health problems. Recently, I heard some heartbreaking news.

A cancer patient posted on online: "Hey guys, I finally found freedom." B majored in broadcasting in college but loved traveling and even obtained a tour guide license. In March 2018, she found a job at a travel agency in Shanghai. However, in July, she was diagnosed with acute lymphoblastic leukemia. She spent the next five years fighting cancer. The family spent a lot of money on her treatment, borrowing from all their relatives. Her father even donated his bone marrow twice. In order to provide better nutrition for his daughter, her father, who couldn't cook at all, became a great cook. Finally, B's condition worsened, and despite efforts to save her, she left her parents who loved her the most.

Tomorrow and accidents, we really don't know which will come first.

All we can do is take care of ourselves while we are still healthy.

2.Beyond physical health, another important aspect is to strive to earn money.

Regardless of one's financial situation last year, in the new year, one must strive to earn money. The primary source is to excel in your main job. Recently, I chatted with a friend named Q who had recently received a promotion and a raise. She shared her experience: "There is no other way but to excel in your profession." Q was originally just a copywriter. Because she enjoyed writing and creativity, she joined her current company. At first, her copywriting didn't grab attention and she was often scolded by her superiors. But Q was tenacious. She kept studying excellent cases and summarizing the logic of successful planning cases. As a result, the number of revisions to her proposals decreased, and the number of compliments from clients increased. Finally, her efforts paid off. At the end of the year, she received a 30% increase in salary.

For most ordinary people, increasing income through their main job is still the main source. It can serve as a safety net and maintain the baseline of income. At the very least, it can rely on one's "irreplaceability" to avoid being laid off when the environment is not good. In addition, doing well in side jobs is equally important. If promotion and salary increases are difficult in middle age, then engaging in side jobs can also be a way to increase income.

3.Dealing with relationships around you: Learn to release love and also learn to let go.

Harvard conducted a 75-year study tracking 724 men and concluded that true happiness is actually a mindset that comes from within. A portion of this mindset comes from achieving self-worth, while another part comes from healthy relationships with others.

A netizen, Moon, shared a story about her aunt who was unhappy for a period of time. In her aunt's own words, she was a "woman with a tough life." As a wife, her husband often worked overtime and didn't come home. When she wanted to talk to him, he was not available, and when they did meet, they often argued.

As a mother, her son also avoided her, locking himself in his room whenever he was home, with very little communication between them. However, according to her husband and son, the situation was completely different: her husband didn't like coming home because every time he did, his wife would either nitpick at him or complain, emitting negative energy. And her son didn't like to communicate with her because his mother was not gentle and often used a serious tone to criticize him.

Later, the aunt met a family therapist. After explaining the situation at home, the therapist offered her some advice: "The reason for the coldness between family members is because they don't feel loved. As a woman in the family, you should be the lubricant. From today onwards, learn to release love to those around you. Start with praising your husband and caring for your children."

After listening to the therapist's advice, the aunt went home and actively shared interesting things that happened during the day with her husband and gently called her son to dinner in the evening. After some time, she noticed a change in the atmosphere at home. Her husband started coming home more often, and her son enjoyed talking to her. Relationships between people are dynamic. If you act rigidly, you will receive indifference, but if you give warmth, you will receive love. And when we start to change, the relationships around us will change too.

There was a post about a friend who always poured cold water on her. She distanced herself from this friend. Much later, when asked why she no longer contacted her, she said, "I can't change her personality, so I had to change the relationship between us." There's a saying I agree with: "The secret to happiness is to place yourself in healthy relationships."

In 2025, try to assess the relationships around you. Cherish those who care about you, and bravely distance yourself from those who make you unhappy.

4.Never stop reading, traveling, and exercising.

"A person not only has this life but also should have a poetic world." Beyond material life, we also need to enrich our spirits. In doing so, boredom becomes interesting.

Reading and traveling are the best choices for enriching the spirit. Reading is a journey of the mind, and traveling is reading for the body. A friend named C always seems full of energy, and someone asked her for the secret to her zest for life. She said, "There's no other reason than having an escape route." While at work, she feels drained and frustrated like everyone else, but when the weekend comes, she either stays at home and reads all morning or flies to another city for the weekend. Just the thought of going to see the snowy mountains sweeps away her worries.

Every time she returns from a trip, the energy she brings back is enough to sustain her for a long time.

And if you really can't find a hobby, why not try exercising?

V is a running enthusiast who once shared his experience in a book. In 2005, he was diagnosed with diabetes. The doctor told him, "Diabetes is incurable. You need to take medication for the rest of your life or rely on insulin." After hearing this news, he became depressed and even developed depression.

At the lowest point, a friend advised him to go out, take a walk, run, and breathe fresh air. With a try-it-out attitude, V insisted on going to the nearby park for a few steps every day. After six months, not only did his weight decrease, but he also no longer needed to take medication. He himself exclaimed: Running completely changed my life.

If you feel that your life is a mess right now, consider sticking to exercise for a while. Even if it doesn't solve all your problems, at least it can change your mental state.

"There are three things in life that cannot be saved. The first is reading, the second is traveling, and the third is exercising." I strongly agree with this. Besides work, one should always have something to rely on spiritually, even if it's just something small like running.

In 2025, in addition to working hard, make sure to enrich your spirit. It could be learning a new skill or cultivating a hobby. Both the body and the soul should be on the move. Life can indeed be designed. No matter what hand you were dealt initially, without planning, life is like a pile of sand. But with clear plans and specific actions, life can be aggregated into a tower, allowing you to go further.

In the new year, if you want to restart your life and change yourself, you must adhere to self-discipline and never be lazy or give up. Keep healthy. Physical health is paramount. Even if other goals are not achieved, being healthy and free from illness, with all health indicators in order, is already commendable.

Work hard and earn money. Whenever possible, maintain your ability to work and earn money. This is the capital for adults to settle down.

Handle relationships with those around you. Learn to love others and let yourself be loved, placing yourself in healthy relationships and staying away from relationships that drain you.

Enrich yourself. If you have no money, read more; if you have money, travel more. Not only can this broaden your horizons, but it can also enrich your soul.

"A day's labor is a day's wage; persistence brings success."

The process of transformation may be difficult, but the fruits will be sweet.

What are your goals or plans for 2025? Feel free to share them in the comments, and next year on this day, we'll check back together.

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Friday, December 27, 2024

Six Habits to Thrive in the New Year

In life, happiness and sorrow coexist; joy and sadness walk hand in hand. No one's life is completely smooth sailing. However, we must believe that the current difficulties will pass, and what lies ahead in our future will be joy and happiness. In the new year, each of us should care more about ourselves. Starting with small things and making the best use of the present is the best way to make life more beautiful. Today, I'm sharing six good habits to help us embrace the new year and live a more fulfilling life.

1.Think Less

People without anxiety aren't without it because they are solving the problems causing anxiety. The most effective way to eliminate anxiety is quite simple: to immediately do what causes your anxiety. Often, the more you think, the more anxious you become. No matter how big the problems in life, excessive worry only makes the situation worse. Life presents challenges; everyone faces various pressures. In the New Year, what we truly need to do is to reduce our worries and take more practical action. Remember, the true way to change things is through practical action.

2.Be Optimistic in Everything

If a person's heart is filled with clouds of worry, life will inevitably be full of obstacles. If you live with negative emotions, not only will you feel unhappy, but you won't be able to have a positive impact on others. Worries come from within. To live comfortably, one must positively interpret and understand life. We have many choices in life. To stay optimistic, realize that many people in the world face greater difficulties than you. Face life with a mindset that 'as problems arise, solutions arise', then every day will be filled with beautiful scenes.

3.Find Happiness in Life

In life's journey, there's an endless stream of tasks. If your heart is full of anxiety, happiness will stay far away. When feeling exhausted, stop and take a break. Everyone faces difficulties and grievances; continuous tension will undoubtedly rob life of its joy. The writer Gogol once said, "Happiness prolongs life." Happiness is the vitality of body and mind, hope and belief, confidence in the present and future, and faith in all progress. No matter the situation, with a happy attitude, life will become more fulfilling.

4.Follow a Regular Diet

Food plays a crucial role in life. In daily diet, the balance between meat and vegetables is crucial, with more fresh vegetables. Many health experts also advise: "Eat well for breakfast, eat until you're full for lunch, eat less for dinner." Oily foods and irregular eating habits are not good for health. Reduce meat intake, eat more vegetables, and keep food consumption to about 70% full.

5.Work Diligently

"Life doesn't have too late a start; it's just too lazy to fulfil it." Laziness will consume a person's willpower and enthusiasm, leading to inaction and feelings of defeat. No matter what you do, it doesn't depend on timing, but on whether you are willing to put in the effort. In the new year, working diligently and completing the tasks assigned by your superiors will not only help you earn more but also earn recognition from your boss. Those who are too lazy will find it difficult to lead a good life. If you want to live better, in the new year, make sure to be proactive.

6.Exercise a Little More

We all know the benefits of exercise, but very few actually put it into action. Many people believe that exercise will make them tired; hence they refuse to do it. But perhaps you're not aware that not exercising will make you more tired. People who rarely exercise feel back pain after doing physical activities and feel out of breath after walking a bit. These are signs of a lack of exercise. In the new year, don't hesitate anymore. Start now and create an exercise plan for yourself. By persisting in exercising, you will have a healthy body. Only with good health can life be more beautiful. Time can't be reversed, and moments can't be stopped. I hope in the days ahead, you will strive forward. Let's start with these small habits and shape a brand new self.

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Friday, November 22, 2024

Reflections: To Myself Gradually Growing Old


Time passes like flowing water, never waiting for anyone. Winter goes, spring arrives, and years swiftly slip by, with a person's life only comprising around thirty thousand days. The ruthless edge of time leaves numerous marks of the years on people. Imperceptibly, we too age alongside.

As we age, we gradually understand that there aren't many essential things in life.

Maintain Emotional Balance and Sustain Health

Humans experience various emotional fluctuations, where some might erupt in anger while others remain calm. Life is a journey where one encounters various people and situations, and not everyone can understand you. Growing older, we come to realize that a broad mind resolves matters smoothly and a calm heart fosters harmonious relationships. Prioritizing emotional care and sustaining health is more critical than anything, as life is fleeting.

Stay Optimistic and Positive Towards Everything

It's said that the heart is the lamp in a person's body; when the heart is dark, the world appears dark, but with a bright heart, the world is illuminated. Life encounters many unexpected situations. Ups and downs are the norm, and no one has a smooth journey. Some things bring sheer joy, while others leave one feeling vexed. Whether good or bad, it's important to learn to be positive and optimistic, facing life's fluctuations with composure. "A small heart makes big problems, a big heart makes small problems." Learn to accept everything, not be disturbed by difficulties, and not be troubled by trifles. Learn to let go of things that need to be released. With age, learn to free your mind.

Refine Each Day, Embrace Old Age Calmly

Life is not as beautiful as you imagine, nor as bad as you fear. Previously, we lived for others, carrying all the burdens, but now we learn to travel light and live for ourselves. Life, whether in death or life, seems passive. Even though life appears to offer many choices, it often lacks genuine options. Nevertheless, life has passed in this manner. As we age, we gradually understand the importance of exploring our interests, finding a spiritual belonging. Approach each day earnestly and embrace old age calmly.

Simplify Your Social Circle, Appreciate Solitude

Solitude is a form of self-indulgence. With age, we need to learn to reduce our social circle and savor the beauty of spending time alone. The circle isn't about quantity but quality. To broaden our horizons, we need to distance ourselves from limited circles. If we wish to grow faster, we need to bid farewell to friends who waste our time. Only when we streamline our social circle do we understand that not every circle benefits us, and not every friendship is worth deep connections. Learn to accept the unsatisfactory and appreciate the present moment. By simplifying the intricate, we grasp our remaining life. By focusing more on ourselves, our inner self becomes richer, and happiness follows suit.

Cherish Friendship, Maintain Connection

As the years go by, looking back, one realizes there aren’t many friends truly worthy of praise. Those false friendships have long faded with time.

After going through half a lifetime, only now have I come to understand that in this world, one should maintain connections; the bonds in our hearts should be cherished. The journey through most of life is not easy, not everyone can enter our lives, and not everyone is worthy of continuous contact.

Choose friends who stand the test of time and align with our values. The value of a friend lies in their quality, not quantity. One or two sincere friends who treat us genuinely are worth more than many insincere ones.

Having one confidant in life is more than enough. To become true friends to each other is indeed not easy.

Understanding Children, Maintaining Equanimity

Life is an ever-evolving journey, especially concerning the relationship with our children. As time passes, we grow old while they gradually mature.

They are no longer the unknowing children who needed our guidance. We must learn to let go, understand our children, comprehend the difficulties of their growth, and maintain a balanced mindset.

We shouldn’t interfere with our children’s choices but offer appropriate support. Understanding children requires acceptance. Maintaining equanimity is an act of wisdom.

May we preserve a balanced mindset, with fewer expectations and more tolerance. Let's smile at the future and treat the gradual aging process kindly.

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Friday, November 15, 2024

The Middle Ages: Unlocking Life's Most Magnificent Chapter

Middle age usually refers to the midpoint in a person's life, roughly between 35 and 55 years old. This stage is often a period of experiencing various changes and challenges in both career and personal life. Some people consider middle age as the golden period of life because individuals might have established a career; possess some economic stability and family life, while also maintaining a certain level of energy and ambitions.

During the middle age phase, individuals might have more experience and wisdom, with more resources and opportunities to pursue personal goals. However, some responsibilities and pressures may increase, particularly from family, career, and financial aspects.

While some might feel content and balanced due to the maturity and stability of this phase, it's not the case for everyone. Each person's feelings and experiences of middle age vary due to the diversity of individual life circumstances and experiences.

During middle age, some individuals might re-evaluate their life goals and values, potentially reconfiguring their path, seeking more meaning and fulfilment. This period can also be a crucial stage for personal growth and development, prompting positive changes in their mental and physical health and lifestyle.

Reasonableness and understanding

Individuals likely have learned much from life and career experiences, leading to emotional and intellectual maturity. This maturity helps them better cope with daily life challenges and more rationally handle conflicts and issues.

During middle age, people generally comprehend and respect the feelings of others more, feeling a heightened sense of responsibility, considering family and society more. Their actions are more measured and deliberate to ensure their decisions and actions align with logic and reason. This trait of reasonableness makes them more adept at communicating, negotiating, and problem-solving in social and interpersonal relationships.

Moreover, middle-aged individuals might have more control and understanding of their emotions and feelings, aiding them in better balancing the various emotional challenges in life. This balanced approach of rationality and emotions typically helps maintain a stable and mature role within both work and family life.

Improve Skills

Middle age is often seen as a crucial stage in life, where people seek balance and strive to deal with various challenges. During this phase, individuals may have more responsibilities, including work, family, and social relationships. Improving skills can involve continually learning new skills, enhancing professional knowledge, and improving skill levels to adapt to the ever-changing environment. This may include expanding knowledge through educational courses, work experiences, and self-directed learning to enhance performance in the workplace.

In middle age, individuals might realize the need to continuously adapt to new technologies, trends, and changing workplace requirements. This indicates the necessity for lifelong learning and constant skill improvement to adapt to the evolving social and professional environment. Through ongoing learning and the development of new skills, an individual can attain greater success in their career. This might involve professional development, lifelong learning, and exploring new fields. Skill enhancement can provide better job opportunities, increase work efficiency, and improve job satisfaction. Additionally, it better prepares individuals to meet the rapidly changing demands of the workplace.

Moreover, improving skills also aids in personal development. It enhances confidence and helps to better understand personal interests and goals. Through continuous learning, an individual can develop their hobbies, improve social abilities, enhance creativity, and prepare for future challenges.

Overall, improving skills is a positive life attitude and a crucial approach to improving abilities in middle age to cope with life's challenges and changes. It also bestows greater confidence upon middle-aged individuals, enabling them to better navigate their career challenges and remain competitive in a fiercely competitive market.

Emotional Control

Emotional control is particularly critical during middle age. This phase might face challenges from career, family, and personal pressures, hence achieving emotional balance and management becomes vital. Managing emotions not only helps to handle stress but also enhances personal mental health and the quality of life for those around us.

Emotional management involves learning to recognize one's emotions and employing positive ways to deal with them. This might include seeking professional help, learning relaxation techniques, or using exercise to relieve stress. Developing positive emotional management skills can heighten self-awareness, promote inner calmness, improve relationships, and assist in better handling challenges and stress.

During middle age, emotional management also fortifies family relationships. Dealing with various pressures in the family, knowing how to control emotions can improve communication with partners and children, uplifting the overall family atmosphere.

Whether facing career challenges, family stress, or personal growth needs, more emotional intelligence is required. Emotional stability and handling methods become vital during this phase.

Emotional control entails understanding one's emotions, managing emotional fluctuations, and not allowing emotions to influence one when facing challenges. The key components include:

  1. Emotion Recognition: Identifying emotions is fundamental to emotional intelligence. Understanding what emotions are and recognizing the situations that trigger specific emotions is crucial.
  2. Emotional Management: Learning not to let negative emotions control oneself; this can be achieved through practices like meditation, relaxation, physical exercise, etc., to adjust one's emotional state.
  3. Self-Control: Rational thinking is more important than emotional decisions in controlling emotions. Managing impulses and emotional outbursts is vital for maintaining calmness and rationality.
  4. Communication Skills: Expressing one's emotions through effective communication while learning to listen and understand others' emotions.
  5. Stress Management: Acquiring the skills to handle stress and finding suitable ways to de-stress, such as physical exercise, music, art, or engaging with family and friends.
  6. Positive Mindset: Cultivating a positive way of thinking is crucial when facing challenges as it assists in approaching problems with greater optimism.
  7. Professional Help: Seeking professional psychological counselling might be a beneficial choice when emotions are challenging to control or emotional issues arise.

Mastering emotional control requires continuous practice and self-reflection. Not only does it improve life quality, but it also enhances the performance of middle-aged individuals in their work, family, and social relationships.

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Friday, November 8, 2024

Beyond the Bank Account: The Deepest Middle-Age Sorrows

Middle age can bring about complex emotions and anxieties, and one of the main sorrows is that even though they've achieved a certain level of success in their careers and might have attained a certain level of material wealth; they still feel a sense of inner emptiness and lack. This kind of sorrow can originate from inner quests and reflections. Wealth and a sense of achievement often cannot fill the inner void. Past aspirations might not have met expectations, and uncertainties about the future and life after retirement can bring about unease.

Additionally, middle age is often accompanied by family responsibilities, such as taking care of aging parents or raising children, which adds pressure, making individuals feel more squeezed and anxious. As age advances, physical changes and concerns about health can also be worrisome.

Moreover, middle age is a period for self-reflection, which might lead to confusion and regret about past choices and the direction of life. This self-reflection and quest for the meaning of life can trigger a kind of inner pain and anxiety, leaving individuals feeling emotionally empty and lost.

Inner Emptiness

The inner emptiness experienced by middle-aged individuals can stem from various factors, such as life changes, shifts in family responsibilities, the pursuit of meaning and fulfilment, personal stress, and societal expectations. Let's delve deeper into these factors:

  1. Change and Loss: Middle-aged individuals might face changes like retiring from a career, children growing up, or the loss of loved ones. These changes lead them to lose what was once the focus of their lives, causing confusion and emptiness.
  2. Diminished Family Responsibilities: With children reaching adulthood, the reduction in family responsibilities might leave middle-aged individuals feeling adrift without a central focus in life.
  3. Quest for Meaning: Middle-aged individuals often begin to contemplate the meaning of life and their personal values. Many might feel empty as they lack a clear understanding of their life goals and values.
  4. Psychological Stress and Anxiety: Reassessing one's success and achievements, especially in comparison to societal and personal expectations, might lead to psychological stress and anxiety.
  5. Societal Expectations: Some cultures view middle-aged individuals as a stage of career success and stable family life. Inability to meet these expectations can result in feelings of emptiness and loss.

The inner feeling of emptiness resulting from these factors may have an impact on the emotions and psychological state of middle-aged individuals. Therefore, recognizing and dealing with these emotions correctly is crucial in helping them overcome the sense of inner emptiness.

Middle age might be accompanied by a sense of inner emptiness. Here are some suggestions for overcoming the inner emptiness that comes with middle age:

  1. Reignite passion: Explore new hobbies or interests, such as engaging in art, volunteering, or learning new skills. These activities can reignite passion.
  2. Build a social circle: Maintain contact with friends and family, engage in social activities. Attending gatherings, events, or joining interest groups can reduce feelings of loneliness.
  3. Seek psychological support: Talk to a counsellor or therapist. Having someone to confide in can be a good way to alleviate inner stress.
  4. Exercise: Physical activity releases chemicals like dopamine and endorphins, aiding in mood improvement.
  5. Focus on personal growth: Set clear goals and plans, whether in the workplace, personal development, or learning. The process of growth and the progress achieved can fill the void.
  6. Find inner peace: Learn meditation or relaxation techniques. This can help soothe inner anxieties and unease.
  7. Acknowledge oneself: Value achievements and experiences while accepting one's shortcomings. Self-esteem is the first step in dispelling inner emptiness.
  8. Challenge oneself: Set new goals and achieve them gradually. Challenging oneself helps maintain vitality and motivation.

Hopefully, these suggestions will help alleviate the sense of inner emptiness that might arise in middle age. Different people have different ways of dealing with these feelings, so finding the right approach for oneself is crucial.

Health

Middle age is an important stage in life, and the maintenance and management of health are crucial. During middle age, individuals might face various health challenges. Lifestyle choices become more critical, including dietary habits, exercise, and mental health. Maintaining a balanced diet and moderate exercise are paramount for overall health. Additionally, regular check-ups and communication with healthcare providers are essential in early detection of potential health issues.

Simultaneously, mental health is equally crucial. Middle-aged individuals may encounter increased stress from work, family, and anxiety about future plans, which can impact emotional and psychological well-being. Therefore, learning relaxation and self-care techniques is crucial, such as meditation, reading, exercise, engaging in art, and spending time with family and friends.

To maintain health in middle age, attention must be given to the balance between physical and mental health. It's not just about physical well-being; mental and emotional health are equally significant because health is a comprehensive concept that encompasses the individual’s physical, mental, and social well-being.

Dreams

Middle age is a period to re-evaluate life and dreams. Many people begin to reconsider their goals and dreams during this phase to ensure a richer and more meaningful life.

Some might seek personal growth and learn new skills. This could involve exploring new hobbies, learning a new language, pursuing further education, or reigniting interests once set aside in their youth.

For others, middle age is a time to review career and family objectives. They may begin to pursue more meaningful careers or prioritize family harmony and happiness.

Some individuals may redirect their focus towards traveling and exploration, seeking broader horizons and discovering new cultures and landscapes.

In middle age, dreams are not limited to personal development alone. They encompass expectations and aspirations for family, career, and the world. This is a period to redefine life goals and meanings.

The Importance of Middle-Aged Dreams lies in representing an individual's deep inner pursuits and values. These dreams can offer motivation and guidance, making life feel more meaningful and worth pursuing. Here's why middle-aged dreams are significant:

  1. Guiding Life's Direction: Middle-aged dreams are the goals and visions individuals set for their desired and aspired future. They can guide a person's direction in life and serve as markers for personal growth.
  2. Inspiration and Drive: Having dreams can inspire internal drive, urging individuals to continually seek growth and improvement. They can be a driving force for personal success and fulfilment.
  3. Psychological Fulfilment: Achieving middle-aged dreams can bring internal satisfaction and happiness. Whether it's learning new skills, exploring through travel, caring for family, or attaining financial security, realizing these dreams can provide a sense of fulfilment and accomplishment.
  4. Fostering Personal Growth: Middle-aged dreams contribute to higher levels of personal growth, constantly pushing individuals to exceed themselves. By pursuing these dreams, people can continue learning, developing skills, and broadening their experiences.
  5. Shaping Life Values: Realizing dreams can help individuals understand themselves more clearly, defining their values and objectives, which positively impacts both the individual and their family.

In conclusion, middle-aged dreams are a crucial part of life. They provide direction, inspiration, and impetus, serving as vital sources for personal growth and psychological fulfilment.

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