Golden Years Prep: Three Essentials for Happiness

Recently, I came across a popular video on a certain platform. An 88-year-old ex teacher was interviewed on the roadside: "What are your thoughts on old age?" The elderly person firmly responded, "No surgery, no intubation, no resuscitation. Especially, no admission to the intensive care unit." When asked for the reason, the elderly person said, "At my age, death is inevitable. Resuscitation would not only make me suffer but also waste national resources. These resources are better used to save young people." While the elderly person's open-mindedness is admirable, can their children agree?

"I always tell them, instead of forcibly holding onto your parents' physical bodies, think about the influence your parents had on you. Keeping these good memories is enough." This insightful dialogue garnered millions of likes from netizens.

 "A good death is better than a life of painful lingering" is a deeply rooted concept among countless people. "Longevity" has always been assumed to be the best blessing for the elderly. However, is a long life equivalent to a happy life?

More and more elderly people are beginning to offer "unconventional" answers. I once read a story about a senior who suffered a sudden stroke and was rushed to the hospital. After doctors made every effort to save his life, they managed to bring him back from the brink. However, for the rest of his life, he needed round-the-clock care from medical staff to continue living. In other words, he became a "living dead" person.

Yet, his daughter insisted on not giving up her father's life. As a result, the elderly man spent four years in the ICU before multiple organ failure led to his demise. While the daughter's filial piety is commendable, doctors have a different view: "Although we extended his life, we did not improve his quality of life." "Family members can visit for only one hour a day. What his daughter sees is that he seems happy during that one hour. So, she thinks he's happy every day. But what we see is the patient suffering for the remaining 23 hours."

The daughter of the elderly man was once asked, "Have you ever thought that perhaps your father would prefer to pass away more peacefully?" She replied, "I dare not think about it, nor do I want to. At least for now, I can afford to give him the best treatment, which makes me feel better." Of course, as children, it's very difficult for us to actively give up our parents' lives! As long as we can still save them, we want to keep our parents with us for another day.

But if we look at it from a different perspective, if the elderly person can express their wishes, would they praise their children's filial piety, or would they criticize their children for making them suffer? The elderly person may not bear to make such a choice, but I believe everyone has their own answer in their hearts. Regardless of whether we are willing to admit it, longevity is premised on "health." Otherwise, it's "living in suffering."

In this regard, elderly people often see more clearly than young people. "Many elderly people have been eating medication for a long time, ruining their bodies." Therefore, more and more elderly people are adopting the retirement philosophy of "treating minor illnesses, accepting major illnesses, and not pursuing excessive medical treatment." "The sooner you go, the better. Don't burden your children and end up with nothing."

"Living longer" is becoming easier, but "living well" is becoming more difficult.

Despite advances in medical conditions and improvements in living standards, why are so many elderly people less inclined to "live" now? It's because while society has progressed, elderly care has become more challenging. Foremost among them is the fact that "raising children is no longer a guarantee against old age."

It's not that children don't want to be filial, but they are truly powerless. I once saw a video online. A senior was bedridden for 16 years, and it was his daughter in her fifties who took care of him. Every day, she had to lift him in and out of bed, clean up his waste, bathe him, feed him, give him medicine, and take him for walks... Every day, for 16 years.

This is indeed a perfect example of "raising children to prevent old age."

But what about the other side of the story?

The senior had a pension that could cover most of his living expenses; the daughter retired early, giving up her personal life entirely to care for her father; the son-in-law took on most of the work of earning money and raising children; the daughter's family had no financial pressure from mortgages or car loans; there were other relatives in the family who could occasionally share the responsibility of caregiving.

Behind this "perfect" filial piety are the aggregation of numerous conditions and countless sacrifices. It's difficult to replicate in every family. We always remember "raising children to prevent old age" as a tradition, but forget that "it was a product of a specific era." In the past, medical conditions were poor, and parents generally did not live long.

There were fewer elderly people suffering from dementia or hemiplegia, and caring for them was not as difficult as it is now. Plus, at that time, every family's finances were similar, there were more children, and many women didn't work. "There was not much financial pressure"  making it less difficult to support elderly parents.

But what about now?

For couples with children, life becomes unsustainable if one doesn't go out to earn money. Although the elderly are living longer, they are also plagued by various illnesses, requiring long-term care. Parents, children, work, mortgages, car loans—all these are mountains pressing down on middle-aged people.

This forces children to make sacrifices. Although everyone makes different choices, under the harsh reality, there are always parents who "can't rely on" their children. So, if not relying on children, what about relying on society? Currently, our society's elderly care mainly consists of "home-based care" or "nursing homes."

Elderly people who can take care of themselves mostly choose to stay at home, which is free and saves money. As for the elderly people who are sent to nursing homes, they generally have various illnesses, and they lose some of their ability to care for themselves.

"Not making mistakes" is the caregivers' top priority. "Making the elderly happy" can only be an added bonus. Therefore, the "hardship" in nursing homes does not come from the news about elderly abuse but rather because: under limited manpower conditions, only basic care and some emotional support can be provided to the elderly.

Ensuring that the elderly "stay alive" rather than "live well." As you can see, although medical advances unilaterally extend the lives of the elderly, how they can live well remains a "dilemma." After retirement, some elderly people learn swimming, painting, calligraphy, or singing. Even if their children are not around, their lives are fulfilling and happy.

Happy people are always similar. Many elderly people who have a good late life understand one thing: "Elderly care depends on oneself." Life can never be perfect at any age.

We can always find a lifestyle that suits us better among them. Prepare three savings:

I once saw a sentence online that inspired me: "Elderly care is actually choosing a way to grow old gracefully. There is no limit to the method, and there is no standard answer.

But the most important thing is: always remember to put yourself first."

To spend your old age more comfortably, I suggest everyone include "retirement planning" in their life plan. Starting from now, prepare the following "three savings":

1.Financial savings

The reason why money is important is that it gives the elderly "choices": they can buy what they want to eat, go wherever they want; if their children are not filial, they can hire caregivers to live alone without worrying about their children's faces; and in case of illness, having money in their pockets will ease their minds. When it comes to elderly care, money is definitely more reliable than children.

Many elderly people have been frugal all their lives, just to subsidize their children.

But really don't do this.

You can occasionally help your children in emergencies, but never make it an entitlement. Leave the money to yourself, and let your children take responsibility for their own lives. Taking care of ourselves with money is the greatest help we can give our children.

2.Psychological value savings

Many elderly people have a smooth material life in their old age, but they always feel bitter inside because they base their happiness on "their children's companionship." Why not change your perspective? Treat your old age as your "second life."

Make your own "bucket list," try things you like, and learn to make yourself happy. We've worked hard all our lives, and it's only in our old age that we finally have the "money and leisure." We must make the most of it.

3.Health savings

Undoubtedly, "health" is the most important condition for elderly care. But it's placed last because it's also the most uncontrollable and powerless part for the elderly. No one can stop the aging and deterioration of the body.

So, while your body is still healthy, eat clean food, exercise regularly, and take care of your physical and mental health. Once illness strikes, learn to accept the decline of life naturally. "Treat minor illnesses, accept major illnesses, and avoid excessive medical treatment," allowing life to end gracefully and gently.

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Reflections: To Myself Gradually Growing Old

Time passes like flowing water, never waiting for anyone. Winter goes, spring arrives, and years swiftly slip by, with a person's life only comprising around thirty thousand days. The ruthless edge of time leaves numerous marks of the years on people. Imperceptibly, we too age alongside.

As we age, we gradually understand that there aren't many essential things in life.

Maintain Emotional Balance and Sustain Health

Humans experience various emotional fluctuations, where some might erupt in anger while others remain calm. Life is a journey where one encounters various people and situations, and not everyone can understand you. Growing older, we come to realize that a broad mind resolves matters smoothly and a calm heart fosters harmonious relationships. Prioritizing emotional care and sustaining health is more critical than anything, as life is fleeting.

Stay Optimistic and Positive Towards Everything

It's said that the heart is the lamp in a person's body; when the heart is dark, the world appears dark, but with a bright heart, the world is illuminated. Life encounters many unexpected situations. Ups and downs are the norm, and no one has a smooth journey. Some things bring sheer joy, while others leave one feeling vexed. Whether good or bad, it's important to learn to be positive and optimistic, facing life's fluctuations with composure. "A small heart makes big problems, a big heart makes small problems." Learn to accept everything, not be disturbed by difficulties, and not be troubled by trifles. Learn to let go of things that need to be released. With age, learn to free your mind.

Refine Each Day, Embrace Old Age Calmly

Life is not as beautiful as you imagine, nor as bad as you fear. Previously, we lived for others, carrying all the burdens, but now we learn to travel light and live for ourselves. Life, whether in death or life, seems passive. Even though life appears to offer many choices, it often lacks genuine options. Nevertheless, life has passed in this manner. As we age, we gradually understand the importance of exploring our interests, finding a spiritual belonging. Approach each day earnestly and embrace old age calmly.

Simplify Your Social Circle, Appreciate Solitude

Solitude is a form of self-indulgence. With age, we need to learn to reduce our social circle and savor the beauty of spending time alone. The circle isn't about quantity but quality. To broaden our horizons, we need to distance ourselves from limited circles. If we wish to grow faster, we need to bid farewell to friends who waste our time. Only when we streamline our social circle do we understand that not every circle benefits us, and not every friendship is worth deep connections. Learn to accept the unsatisfactory and appreciate the present moment. By simplifying the intricate, we grasp our remaining life. By focusing more on ourselves, our inner self becomes richer, and happiness follows suit.

Cherish Friendship, Maintain Connection

As the years go by, looking back, one realizes there aren’t many friends truly worthy of praise. Those false friendships have long faded with time.

After going through half a lifetime, only now have I come to understand that in this world, one should maintain connections; the bonds in our hearts should be cherished. The journey through most of life is not easy, not everyone can enter our lives, and not everyone is worthy of continuous contact.

Choose friends who stand the test of time and align with our values. The value of a friend lies in their quality, not quantity. One or two sincere friends who treat us genuinely are worth more than many insincere ones.

Having one confidant in life is more than enough. To become true friends to each other is indeed not easy.

Understanding Children, Maintaining Equanimity

Life is an ever-evolving journey, especially concerning the relationship with our children. As time passes, we grow old while they gradually mature.

They are no longer the unknowing children who needed our guidance. We must learn to let go, understand our children, comprehend the difficulties of their growth, and maintain a balanced mindset.

We shouldn’t interfere with our children’s choices but offer appropriate support. Understanding children requires acceptance. Maintaining equanimity is an act of wisdom.

May we preserve a balanced mindset, with fewer expectations and more tolerance. Let's smile at the future and treat the gradual aging process kindly.

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Living Fully: A Guide for Adults to Cherish Life

Simply put: Get good sleep.

These simple four words resonate with many people. In today's fast-paced world, we're often plagued by endless work, feeling exhausted. But if we manage to have a good sleep, not only can we restore our energy and revitalize our skin, but we can also maintain a clear mind and balance our physical well-being.

Roughly one-third of our lives should be spent getting sufficient sleep. However, an increasing number of people find themselves in the dilemma of insufficient sleep, experiencing insomnia, nightmares, and difficulty falling asleep.

Some people overwork and stay up late, while others play with their phones late into the night, then rely on coffee to continue their lives with dark circles under their eyes.

The workaholics and night owls, who have damaged their health through countless late nights, ironically mock themselves for not deserving a good night's sleep.

Those who truly understand the reason know that high-quality sleep brings about high work efficiency and a better life. Sleeping well is a remedy for healing life and a great method for self-cultivation.

The prevalent culture in this era involves staying up late

Statistics show that 90% of young people's sudden deaths are closely related to staying up late. Nights spent binge-watching shows, gaming, or using late nights to console a lonely soul...

If someone accrues too much sleep debt, placing essential matters of life in a secondary position, they're destroying their health and clearly not valuing themselves.

Lack of sleep can result in the ineffective removal of waste from the cerebrospinal fluid, leading to slow reactions, irritability, and even making erroneous decisions.

Looking back at 2010, Ethiopian Airlines Flight 409 crashed into the Mediterranean Sea just five minutes after take-off, with no survivors. Initially suspected to be a terror attack or due to thunderstorms, the investigation revealed an unexpected truth: both pilots suffered from prolonged sleep deprivation and extreme fatigue, causing a minor mistake.

The captain flew continuously in a fatigued state for as long as 45 days prior to the flight, having only a brief rest before this flight and feeling drowsy but still forced to execute the flight. Despite strictly adhering to duty and not relaxing, a foggy consciousness made it impossible to correct errors in time.

Don't take youth for granted, and don't let your body operate beyond its capacity without concern. Regret arrives too late when the Grim Reaper appears.

If you don't value your body, how can your body value you?

Maintaining good sleep habits, going to bed and waking up early, helps you become more focused and committed to your work.

If life is a gamble, a healthy body is your winning hand.

"Your pathway to a good life lies only one step away: a good night's sleep.

There's a story I once heard:

Emily, dubbed by New York media as the "Wall Street future star," was a senior actuary. She worked diligently, displaying remarkable competence in her job. However, soon after, she suffered from severe depression, becoming emotionally unstable. Her career took a downturn, leaving her exhausted.

In many sleepless nights, she confronted her breakdown alone.

One day, Emily, feeling helpless, turned to a priest at the church, asking why she faced such anguish and torment despite her flourishing career, questioning what she might have done wrong.

The priest asked her, "What do you do every night?"

Feeling wronged, Emily replied, "I work hard."

The priest continued, "Do you give yourself time for a good night's sleep? Sufficient time to ease the negative emotions in your heart?"

Emily suddenly realized that the challenges of work are endless, and only through sufficient sleep could she replenish her energy.

Under the guidance of a doctor, she gave up her poor habit of staying up late and specifically focused on the quality and timing of deep sleep.

In just over half a year, her condition gradually improved, and her body began to recover.

We all know that sometimes our phones need to be shut down and rebooted.

If a person is not in a good state, they also need a complete sleep experience.

The comfortable life we dream of is hidden in a good night's sleep every night.

For those who can't sleep well, emotions become sensitive, making them unable to feel happiness, ultimately preventing them from truly enjoying the warmth of home.

Only with sufficient sleep and full rest can one maintain a complete memory and prevent life's rhythm from becoming chaotic.

If you've treated yourself poorly in the past, why not make a promise starting today: to sleep well.

May you fall asleep peacefully every night and wake up full of energy every day.

Only by sleeping well every night can one live a good life.

People who often stay up late have scattered thoughts. The more they want to sleep, the harder it is to fall asleep. Even if they do fall asleep, they easily experience light sleep and numerous dreams. Truly exceptional people won't spend too much energy and thoughts late at night, as excessive thinking only increases worries.

Regarding sleep, here are five methods to improve sleep quality:

1. Make the most of the golden 90 minutes. This is a crucial time for rapid physical recovery, as the brain and body are in a state of deep sleep. Create a comfortable, undisturbed sleep environment before bedtime.
2. The pillow needs to be appropriate. A familiar sleep environment is crucial to maintaining good sleep. Many people carry their accustomed pillow when traveling, as a suitable pillow offers the most comfortable sleep.
3. Create a good sleep environment. Bedroom temperature and lighting may affect sleep, so carefully create an environment conducive to sleep. Ventilate in advance, adjust the temperature and humidity, turn off light sources when sleeping to promote melatonin secretion. Sleeping in a clean, fresh, and quiet environment will make dreams sweeter.
4. Relax your brain and body. Thinking doesn't consume energy, so the brain remains active before sleep. It's best not to use your phone or think about the next day's tasks before sleep, allowing the brain to completely relax. Additionally, avoid strenuous exercise before sleep; some gentle exercises, such as yoga, are suitable.
5. Be mindful of pre-sleep diet. Dinner should not be too heavy, and avoid drinking coffee or strong tea at night, as this not only reduces the gastrointestinal burden and the frequency of nocturnal awakenings but also prevents accelerated heartbeats. Drinking warm milk before sleep can make you sleep better.

Having a good night's sleep is the most important investment for adults. Health will always be the most valuable wealth. Remember, health is the 1, and wealth is the later 0. With health (1), one can achieve a lot of wealth (0); but if you lose health (1), everything goes back to zero.

The world always appreciates those who can discipline themselves to sleep. Please don't waste sleep because good sleep continuously nurtures life. Even amidst the busy life, by enhancing sleep quality, you can take more control of life's rhythm. May you fall asleep worry-free and meet each brand-new day with full vitality."

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Life's Creditors: We Owe Three People Throughout our lives

In our lifetime, we'll meet many people. Some whom we approach sincerely might disappoint us, while others may invest their whole hearts, but we remain indifferent. People long for their efforts to be respected and their sincerity reciprocated. Each encounter we experience essentially is predetermined.

Fate brings people together; without fate, even being close won't make you close, but with it, you can feel connected even if separated by thousands of miles.

If no debts existed, how would there be encounters? Indeed, meetings between individuals are predestined. In our future lives, these three types of relationships must be remembered and cherished because once lost, they cannot be regained.

The Greatest Act is the Unrewarded Act of Bringing Up

Firstly, we must remember our parents' act of bringing up. As the saying goes, "The grace of giving birth and raising you is greater than the sky." This grace is impossible to repay in one's lifetime. From our birth to growing up, our parents have been meticulous in their care for us, something we owe them for our entire lives.

There's a story that goes: An old man went to a cellphone repair shop to check what was wrong with his phone. The technician couldn't find any issue and told the old man his phone was fine. The old man, upon hearing this, burst into tears, "If the phone is fine, then why doesn't my child call me?" This story deeply touches my heart.

As we grow older, we often forget our parents. In the hustle and bustle of work, we tend to overlook them, sometimes not calling for a long time. Yet, our parents are always concerned about us. Even when you're away from home, they always keep their phones close, volume turned up high, afraid to miss your call. Despite understanding our busy lives, they choose to quietly wait. When the call finally arrives, they want to convey their longing for us but still inquire about our well-being, and that's enough for them.

Did you know? Their expression of happiness without reporting their worries is only surface-level. Once the call ends, they can't control their emotions, and tears flow because they miss us immensely.

"The term 'parents' refers to those who, looking at your back, are always filled with joy and sadness, wanting to embrace you but are afraid to show it."

As time passes and we grow wiser, the bond with our parents begins to fade. While they're still around, give them a call, visit home more often, and don’t wait until it's too late to feel remorseful about the missed opportunities.

Mutual Care, Love that Never Gives Up

Are you like me, not envy couples kissing on the streets but rather admire the elderly holding hands while strolling at dusk?

Many people believe that love is easy to come by but hard to sustain in the long run. However, I've always believed that a wonderful relationship nurtures an individual, making both people even better.

I have a friend who has been in a relationship with her boyfriend for ten years. When she decided to start her own business, she had to be in a long-distance relationship with her boyfriend. I asked her if she was worried about the stability of their relationship.

She said, "We've been together for so long, not only relying on each other but also supporting each other. He supports my decisions, and at the same time, I consider our future together. We cherish each other, and that's what makes our relationship enduring."

Indeed, only through cherishing can a relationship endure.

In relationships, companionship is the most enduring form of declaration of love. Parents may pass away first, children might have their own families, but the right person will accompany you through life's ups and downs and share the trivialities of daily life with you.

Love doesn't require grand gestures, but you must understand and cherish those who quietly accompany you, especially your significant other. In any relationship, there are mutual sacrifices. Moderate sacrifice is love, but excessive sacrifice can become dangerous.

Responses foster communication, and cherishing is what makes love last. Never assume that any contribution is taken for granted. In the long passage of time, cherish the one who has always been by your side.

The Helping Hand in times of trouble

There's a saying: "Life doesn't always go as planned, eight or nine times out of ten." Everyone goes through times of disappointment and destitution, but not everyone is fortunate enough to be helped by others.

Only time can verify a person's sincerity. Those who unhesitatingly support you in your most difficult moments, those who accompany you through your adversities, are the people most deserving of your gratitude and appreciation.

There's a story about a pair of good friends—an average-sized person and an overweight person. These friends had known each other for many years, always assisting each other, and passing through many difficult moments together.

One day, the overweight friend asked the average-sized one, "Why have you always wanted to be friends with me?" The average-sized friend replied, "In the past, others used to bully me because I was weak and thin. Only you were willing to protect me. Then, when I faced difficulties in my business, everyone else avoided me, but you were the only one willing to lend me money. Although you are a bit stingy, straightforward, and sometimes say hurtful things, I still feel that being friends with you is wonderful."

The most challenging people to encounter in life are those who help you in your times of trouble, who are willing to help you through tough times, and treat you sincerely. Because everyone is willing to share joy, but not everyone can have the friendship that offers help in difficult times.

Perhaps only through experiencing adversity can one truly see who is sincere and who is not. For those who genuinely treat you well, always hold a heart of gratitude. The way to repay is beyond measure; this kind of friendship is both rare and precious.

"In this world, when you meet someone who treats you sincerely remain a few." Therefore, those who ultimately remain by your side are the most precious. Only through cherishing will the path of life become brighter.

Even the most vigorous campfire, without added wood, will gradually die out. Similarly, even two deeply loving individuals, if they don't cherish each other, can become strangers.

When care diminishes, the relations become distant. As the relations become distant, emotions fade. Once the emotions fade, it's impossible to return to the past. May you learn to be grateful in your remaining years, thanking every person who has helped you.

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30 Tips for a Minimalist Life

1. Making money is the most effective way to protect yourself and those around you.

2. Don't look down on anyone. Many people who wear slippers may be millionaires.

3. People who suffer the most are often the most sober.

4. Broken love is not terrible; it is just paving the way for the arrival of true love.

5. For ordinary people with no background and no resources, insisting on doing one thing can make you surpass 90% of your peers.

Singing, painting, writing, design, etc., find a hobby that you can stick to for more than 10 years, and keep cultivating. There may be no improvement in the first two years. After 5 years, you will get a huge return. After 10 years, you can put this  Do things to the extreme, surpassing the lives and achievements of 90% of your peers.

6. Action is the best way to improve your personality. You may not be able to see anything for a few days, but after a few years, your enthusiasm will spread to a certain extent, and many people will be willing to work hard with you.

7. There are four things in life that you must never do: Don't just take the easy road; Don't try to change others; Don't dare to start because you are afraid of failure; Never have a temper that is greater than your ability.

8. Don't let yourself stop for a long time. Once you get used to being comfortable, you will lose the ability to seek change and eventually become a person abandoned by the times.

9. Wealth is conserved, and the amount of money you make is positively related to the value you provide.

10. It is easy to give up, but it must be cool to persist. Fate will fail a person who works hard, but never fail a person who has been working hard. Treat yourself better, and be cruel to yourself.

11. The easy way is downhill.

12. It's not that you can't find love, but you can't hold on to love. until you think your love is not the love of your life.

13. Reading a book does not change, but if you keep reading, there will be. Reading is not for eloquence, nor for superiority, but for maintaining independent thinking and keeping a sober mind in a noisy world.

Travel

14. Adults can choose to do anything, this is your freedom. Provided that, to think clearly whether you can bear the consequences and the price.

15. True self-confidence comes from fully accepting yourself. otherwise, you will only admire the strong and despise the weak.

16. Salary is always linked to authority. Talking to the leader about salary increase is worse than increasing authority.

17. The horoscope of interpersonal communication: ignore prejudice and stay away from prejudice. People who have prejudice against you, no matter what you do or say, he will oppose you. To avoid these troubles, not explaining or arguing is the best counterattack.

18. In the face of small groups, a neutral relationship is the safest. Don't rush to stand in line, neither good nor bad to people. Because a small group formed for the purpose of isolation will inevitably split again for the purpose of isolation.

If you support him to isolate others today, tomorrow he may unite with others and begin to isolate you. This is due to human nature.

19. In the implementation stage, I am most afraid of having scruples. Just do the planned things, don't always think about it, waste time and torture yourself.

20. People with high emotional intelligence never deliberately please others, but always please themselves.

21. Never lie to yourself. It is much easier to deceive yourself than to deceive others, but it is much more difficult to wake yourself up than to wake up others.

22. The most cost-effective business is to invest in yourself. A shrewd person spends money to improve, but a foolish person only spends money to enjoy, and sit back and eat.

23. To maintain lifelong learning, don't stand still. When the times abandon you, they won't say goodbye to you. If you don't make progress, it is the biggest regression.

24. You try your best to run forward, not to change the world, but to not be abandoned by the world.

25. Be yourself. You can become someone in one day.  Everyone is born an original, don't let yourself live as a pirated version.

26. Don't pin your happiness on others. Because people will change and love will disperse. The road of life is always to be walked by yourself, no one can replace your happiness, and no one can pay for your happiness. Self-sufficient happiness will not worry about gains and losses.

27. Let go of the love that makes yourself humble. For the purpose of love, is to make yourself better, not to scar you all over.

After all, some love can be met but never sought. Those who cannot wait should not wait, and the world that cannot be squeezed in should not hold on.

28. Always keep 30% of the mystery for yourself. Only then will others see a side of you they didn't expect, and you will always bring something new to others. This rule applies to all relationships.

29. 99% of all the people you meet in your life are strangers. So, relax, you don't have that many viewers.

30. If you can't say good things, avoid bad things or shut up. I am afraid that what you say unintentionally will be deliberately interpreted by people with ulterior motives.

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After middle age: work hard for money , spend money sparingly, and save money steadily

 

Some time ago, there was such a topic on the Internet: "What did you understand in the past three pandemic years?"

Someone summed up the following four points:

1. You have to have a house, otherwise you won’t even have a place to stay during quarantine;

2. You have to have savings, and you can maintain your life for at least a period of time if you are unemployed;

3. Lying at home is not as comfortable as imagined, because you will be extremely anxious because you have no income;

4. The more the society develops, the more black swan events there will be. You must have the ability to fight against such uncertainties.

In fact, the conclusion is: you have to be rich.

Money can not only bring dignity and decency, but also the confidence to walk in the world.

In the second half of life, if you want to be self-sufficient in money, you must be ruthless in making money, save money in spending, and be steady in saving money.

1. Work hard for money

A relative of mine was an executive in a tech company a few years ago, and her life was prosperous.

The good times didn't last long, the industry declined, and the company where my relatives worked was on the verge of bankruptcy.

After losing her job, she couldn't find a job of the same position, and refused to lower herself, so she simply stayed at home for a few months.

During this period, a HR friend offered her an olive branch and asked her to work as an assistant to the CEO of a company.

She hesitated for several days, and finally refused.

When she thought about how old she was, she still had to serve tea and water for others, and be ordered by others, and she felt that her self-esteem couldn't stand it.

Not long after, there was an emergency in her family and a large sum of money was needed.

Looking back, I wanted to go to that HR friend for help, but there was no position suitable for her in his company. Life is like this. When you have money to make, you can't save face. If you want to make money with your head down, you have no chance.

"Self-esteem is the skin, making money is to feed the belly, which one is more important to you?"

2. Spend money sparingly

If you don't know how to control your desire to consume, then no matter how much money you earn, you can't keep up with the speed of spending it, and you will squander it sooner or later.

When you are young, you can be wilful to spend all the money you earn.

But when you enter the middle age, you have to consider the burden on you.

There are old people and young in your family, and there are mortgages and insurance premiums to be paid.

Every penny must be spent wisely, and it is even more important to habitually check the balance when going out to spend.

3. Save money

A happy life will not just fall from the sky. Only by learning to invest and save can we have the capital to support the future.

As you get older, the savings in your pocket are your reassurance and your booster.

There used to be a breakfast shop near my house, which was owned by an old couple.

Except for the Chinese New Year, I have never seen this stall rest.

Even when I catches the earliest bus and goes downstairs at five o'clock in the morning, the couple is already preparing for the day to start. Suddenly one day, the stall closed.

I learned from neighbors in the neighborhood that their daughter was admitted to a good university and found a good job after graduation.

The couple also decided to take a break and travel around the world.

I am very curious: going out to travel around the world without doing business should cost a lot of money, right?

Neighbours said that the couple had been silently saving money for so many years.

Not only they managed to help their daughter buy a house with the down payment, but also had enough money in my pocket to live a happy life in their later years.

After middle age, every sum of money you save is your happiness in your later years.

The more balance you have in your card, the easier it will be to live in the future.

A simple and practical "333 Little Rules for Saving Money" works:

Divide your monthly salary into three equal parts: living expenses, savings, and investment.

Save money in this way, no matter what, you can save at least one-third of your income every month.

Of course, the ratio can be adjusted appropriately according to the actual situation, but it is best to strictly implement it according to the plan every month.

Accumulate over a long period of time, gather less to make more, and in the end it is also a big gain.

You must believe that every penny you save is an umbrella to protect you from wind and rain in your later years, and will eventually give you the most fulfilling sense of security.

We used to think that talking about money was crude, but now we find that 99% of the sorrows in the world are related to money.

No amount of chicken soup can compare to the sense of security of a banknote.

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Listen: Podcast

A Letter to the 2022 Self

A tradition to sum up 2022. It has been so fast, another year has passed.

In the past three years of the epidemic, everyone's life has undergone earth-shaking changes.

Changes in the environment and the onslaught of pressure have caused many people to neglect themselves, leading to various problems in life.

Physical discomfort, emotional instability, uneasy state of mind, sluggish state...

I agree with a sentence: "Even if you are in the dark and the ditch, you must love yourself unconditionally."

The more difficult and difficult times are, the more we need to take care of ourselves first.

Don't let the disturbing epidemic affect your life and mood.

1. Improve immunity and have a good body

What did you understand during the epidemic?

The most praised comment below is: Immunity is a person's greatest competitiveness.

During the epidemic, many people either neglected their health for work or ruined their bodies for entertainment, resulting in a continuous decline in body resistance.

It was only when the body was overdrawn and various diseases came to the door that I realized:

You only live once, and there is nothing worth trading your health for. As the British philosopher John Locke said: "Health is necessary for our career and life. Without health, there can be no happiness."

This epidemic is a lesson for each of us.

While sounding the alarm for us, it also gave us the opportunity to fully introspect and adjust our daily routine.

Under the epidemic situation, we must take good care of our bodies and improve our lifestyles.

Adhere to eating on time every day, going to bed early and getting up early, exercising regularly, and living a regular life.

Continuously enhance immunity and prevent viruses, but also build a strong body for yourself.

A good body is the prerequisite for a good life.

2. Manage negative energy, don't let life lose to emotions

Some people say that the epidemic is an amplifier of emotions.

With the development and changes of the epidemic, everyone is experiencing emotional ups and downs.

We will get angry because of a word from others, and we will be inexplicably annoyed by a trifle.

In the impetuous moment, if you can't control your emotions well, it will make the already disrupted life worse.

If you allow yourself to be surrounded by negative emotions, your life will slide into the bottomless abyss.

Life is not easy, everyone has bad times.

In the face of those sudden accidents, only by keeping calm can you not consume yourself in negative emotions.

If you encounter any problems, communicate with the people around you in time, and you can also go out to relax, calm down and meditate.

Under the epidemic situation, please learn to control your emotions.

Only by managing your negative energy well and being less emotional can you deal with the ups and downs of life rationally.

3. Adjust your mentality, life will be smooth

"Life is not as good as you think, but it is not as bad as you think."

If you treat it negatively, your eyes will be full of devastation; if you face it positively, there will be hidden turning points everywhere.

Think of this sentence:

"Life is like a boat sailing in the sea, and the mentality is the steering wheel in our hands, controlling the course of progress."

Everyone hopes that life will always be good and smooth, but there are always some ups and downs that we have to face.

Only a positive attitude can lead us to level the waves and reach the other shore of hope.

Under the epidemic situation, adjust your mentality, change what can be changed, and accept what cannot be changed.

When you calm down, even if you are in despair, you can find the hope of turning against the wind.

4. Cultivate some hobbies to inject vitality into life

In the past three years of the epidemic, I don't know if you have such a moment:

Being isolated at home for too long, not knowing what to do, feeling like every day is long;

The work pressure is very high, and I blindly watch videos and play games, and my heart is extremely empty;

I feel that life is too bitter, without a trace of color, and life is very boring and monotonous.

In the end, I can't cheer up or be interested in many things, and my happiness disappears without a trace "Ordinary people must always live in fun, and life is valuable."

Under the epidemic, only by maintaining curiosity and love for life can we live life to the fullest.

Facing the uncertainty of the outside world, we must learn to find our own happiness and grasp those tiny happiness.

It can be reading a book, learning a dish, or raising some flowers and plants.

It could also be listening to a song, watching a movie, or learning a new skill.

During the epidemic, no matter how difficult the situation is, we must learn to refine the beauty in trivial daily life.

In the days of irritability and depression, a beneficial hobby is a comfort when you are busy, a fulfillment when you are free, and a support when you are low.

"One must have interest in life to be alive."

Learn to constantly enrich your life, and those who have poetry in their hearts will always be able to live a life full of enthusiasm. Three years of the epidemic is a big test for everyone.

Everyone was in a hurry, and there was no time to care.

However, the more flustered the day is, the more you must learn to treat yourself well, take care of your body, and calm your mood.

One day, the epidemic will slowly disappear, the mountains and rivers will return to their original appearance, and the ice and snow will gradually melt.

And you and I, after surviving this cold winter, will meet a better version of ourselves.

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Ten years later, will you thank yourself today?

Are you smart? Part 1

1. Smart people have very few things to do, and ordinary people do everything.

This boils down to the question of choice. Smart people tend to focus on things strategically, only choose to do very minimal, but they can do well and turn themselves into experts in their fields. After they succeed, they use their own experience to exchange with the experts in other fields. , In order to expand one's abilities;

Ordinary people tend to do things the other way around. They have to do and chase for everything and that will expend their limited energy and in turn cannot achieve anything worthwhile.

2. Smart people will spend a lot of time thinking about whether it is worth doing even before starting it. Ordinary people often action immediately and take longer time to bear the long-term consequences of wrong decisions which they should not even start doing it in the first place.

Quoting from Einstein: If I have an hour to solve a problem, I will spend 55 minutes thinking about the problem itself, and then 5 minutes thinking about the solution.

Among the people I came across, people can have similar abilities, but the salary difference can be several times. It is because the person with higher salary will know how to gauge and weigh the consequences of going into the various fields and companies.

3. Smart people treasure time over money and Ordinary people think otherwise.

When a smart person is doing something, he thinks about whether the time spent on it is worthwhile and whether it has long-term value. When ordinary people do something, they think about whether it is expensive or not.

4. The purpose of reading books for smart people is to acquire knowledge, and the purpose of reading books for ordinary people is to finish reading the book.

Smart people read books; they don't care how many books they read, or whether they read every page. What smart people care about is time efficiency. That is, in a period of time, how much they have been inspired by reading books. The more knowledge obtained the better.

Ordinary people who read books care about how many books they have read and how many books they have read, and go out proudly saying that I have read 100 books this year, but gain nothing from the books.

The knowledge of smart people is in the head, and the knowledge of ordinary people remain in the books.

 

Stay Tune for Part 2

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Change yourself, start with managing habits

Change yourself, start with managing habits

What planted is habit, what harvested is destiny.

"How can I live my life well?"

Managing Habits.

"If you develop a good habit, you will never be able to enjoy the interest it brings. If you develop a bad habit, you will be paying off endless debts for the rest of your life."

A good habit is like an intangible asset, and managing a habit is to add value to life

01     Good habits make life, bad habits destroy life

Good or bad habits will not only determine the success or failure of an event, but also affect a person's destiny.

The English poet Dryden said: We make our habits and then habits make us.

A study also shows that more than 40% of people's daily activities are the product of habits, rather than their own active decisions. What really affects life is often not big choices, but small habits.

Multiple Nobel laureates got together years ago.

The reporter asked one of the scholars: "Which university did you go to and learn what you think is the most important thing?"

"In kindergarten," the scholar said calmly.

The reporter continued to ask: "What did you learn in kindergarten?"

The scholar replied: "Learn to give half of your own things to your friends; don't take things that are not yours; keep things neatly; wash your hands before eating; apologize when you do wrong; take a short nap after lunch; observe the nature. That's all I've learned, fundamentally."

Habits have a profound impact on a person's life.

James Clear, a well-known American habit researcher, also revealed:

What determines our quality of life is the quality of our habits.

02     Why are the poor poor, why are the rich rich?

After five years of investigation and research, it was found that many good habits possessed by the rich are not possessed by the poor at all.

These habits are: read often, insist on getting up early, spend 30-40 minutes thinking about problems every day, and not conform to the crowd blindly.

These things are relatively easy to do in the short-term, but very difficult to stick to in the long-term. But as long as you stick to it and form a habit, your life will change amazingly.

British philosopher Bacon said that habit is a tenacious and huge force that can dominate life.

If you want to excel, you must understand that habits determine your future.

The famous American statesman Franklin studied for only one year before being forced to go to the printing house as an apprentice.

In his youth, Franklin lacked self-discipline and could not even find a decent job for a long time. After deep reflection, he found that the key to success lies in developing good habits and perfecting his personality.

So, he summed up the 13 good habits needed for success, namely:

Temperance, Silence, Order, Resolution, Frugality, Industry, Sincerity, Justice, Moderation, Cleanliness, Tranquility, Chastity and Humility.

Then use these habits as goals, find all kinds of bad habits in yourself, and correct them one by one.

Franklin said that excellence is a habit, and life can be successful only if good habits accompany life.

Life is nothing but the sum of countless habits.

03      

The book "The Power of Habit" depicts a true story.

The protagonist, Lisa Allen, started smoking and drinking at the age of 16, and her life was in a mess. These bad habits made her body fat and bloated. She used to live in debt, and when she was in her 20s, she was taken into hiding by a debt collection agency for asking for $10,000 in debt.

She also doesn't have a stable job, and the longest job she held was less than a year.

It could be said that her life was terrible.

At the age of 34, Lisa made up her mind to change her lifestyle.

At first, she just insisted on running and developed good exercise habits, and gradually changed her eating habits, working habits, sleeping habits, saving habits, and study habits.

Through the change of one habit, the change of another habit is driven, and Lisa's life is also changing quietly.

She stopped drinking, quit smoking, and started studying hard, pursuing a master's degree.

Finally, she managed to lose weight, found a long-term job, bought a house, and got engaged. Good habits are the stepping stone to a better life, and bad habits are the stepping stones to the corridor of failure.

In many cases, it is not when you become excellent that you can have good habits, but when you have good habits, you can become better.

Samurai Furukawa, the author of "How to Quit Bad Habits", also had many bad habits. When he realized that these habits brought a lot of trouble to his life, he was determined to quit these bad habits one by one. He strictly controls the sleep time, no longer stays up late, and insists on going to bed on time at eleven o'clock every night;

In order to eliminate procrastination, he went to the company an hour earlier every day to handle the most important work;

Weekends are no longer about sleeping until you wake up naturally and spending the day lazily, but getting up early to make plans for a new day.

After three months of regular life, he successfully lost 8 kilograms and regained his past look and self-confidence.

When you get rid of one bad habit after another, you can take back control of your life.

04      

Jobs said this:

"In the first 30 years of your life, you develop habits;

For the last 30 years of your life, your habits define you. "

In the book "The Power of Habit", three methods are mentioned and shared with you.

1. Identify the habits you want to cultivate and reward yourself in time.

When you complete a stage, reward yourself once and motivate yourself positively, so that you can persevere and persevere.

For example, stick to fitness, stick to it several times a week, and reward yourself with a small gift after sticking to it for a month.

2. Set up "touch buttons" that is simple, obvious and easy to implement.

The so-called "touch the button" is when you see or think of something, start to act immediately, without delay.

For example, if you want to read before going to bed, you can put a book under your pillow. When you touch the book, you immediately put down what you are doing, and open the book to read a few pages.

If you want to get into the habit of getting up and running in the morning, set an alarm clock, get up immediately and go for a run when the alarm clock rings.

3. Between "touch the button" and "reward", repeat the habit.

Between "touching the button" and "rewarding," repeat, repeat, repeat, and keep going.

When a behavior persists for more than 21 days, the body will remember this action and form a natural habit.

What a person sows is habit, and what he reaps is behavior; if he keeps doing, what he reaps is destiny.

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Why insist on exercising? This is the best answer I have ever seen

Why insist on exercising? This is the best answer I have ever seen

01 

I have heard of such a sentence: "Exercise is an investment that will not make people regret. When you start to fall in love with exercises, health will also fall in love with you."

My aunt is a retiree but she still gets up at 6 o'clock every morning. She will run at the park connector, and then goes home to make breakfast and start her daily life. When the sun sets, she will go out and jog again, and she persisted for several years. Now that she is nearly 60 years old, she still looks like she is 30 years old. I asked her why she loves exercising so much. She said: "When I was young, I had a serious illness, and I learnt to cherish my life. I exercise every day to make me feel more at ease."

The body is the foundation of a happy life. If life is a series of numbers, the body is 1, and money, fame and fortune are the 0s at the back. Once there is no 1, there is no point in adding more zeros behind. Most people who like exercising have a healthier and stronger body. Exercising well and strengthening the body are the base for a person to cope with life.

02 

Exercise not only toughens the body, it also makes people feel more comfortable and relaxed.

I was browsing Facebook a while ago and I came across the posts from a friend. When she was young, she used to be very successful, but suffered a major setback ten years ago. She became depressed and obese for a period of time, and she did not dare to talk to others. When I came across her post recently, I found that she has fallen in love with fitness. Not only has her body regained fitness, she also looks very refreshed. She often shares her daily routine of running and exercising.

I wonder if you find that those who love to exercise seem to be more optimistic. They rarely worry about what happened, and they rarely fall into emotional troughs. Exercise can't help us solve the problems we encounter, but it can give people a way to release bad emotions and make people more positive.

Just imagine, after letting the sweat take away the gloomy mood, wont the person's state be more positive?

03 

The process of exercise is also the process of strengthening yourself. This is especially true for the seemingly boring repetition actions; you can develop good habits and overcome your weaknesses.

I came across this pair of parents; they were very worried about their child. He was timid and weak, and he did not dare to take the initiative to speak to his peers. The teacher suggested that they take their child to learn Judo and run more often. One year later, the child became more masculine and bolder subconsciously. The reason is that the child had strengthened his physique and self-confidence during sports and the children's willpower has become stronger after being thrown in Judo, and he can endure hardships without escaping.

Exercise can cultivate stronger mentality. People who exercise for a long time are mostly good at controlling their emotions and have higher endurance; they have clear goals and strong focus; they don't get trapped by the past and are not afraid of failure.

I have heard of such a sentence: "If you want to get angry, then start running." Exercise is a good medicine for resolving worries, embracing life and self-change. Go exercise, every drop of sweat you shed while exercising now will not disappoint you in the future.

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