Some feelings, only oneself understands

The saddest moments in life are when you truly don't want to say or do anything. You just want to be alone in silence for a while.

There are many people around you saying, "If you have any troubles, remember to talk to me." But every time you feel troubled, you open your phone, look at a long list of contacts, and don't know who to reach out to.

The words you want to say are always composed and then deleted. Or, when the call connects, and you hear the other person's voice, suddenly you don't want to talk anymore. No matter what others ask, you say everything is fine, it's okay.

In this world, there are some feelings that only you understand. No matter how you describe your feelings, others only understand the surface. Some people think you're not strong enough, some think you're too dramatic, and some even want to rub salt in your wounds.

I once saw a question: Why do people become silent as they grow up?

Because you start to understand that even if you say a lot, even if your dependence runs deep, the number of people who can truly help you is few. Sometimes silence is not because there's nothing to say, but it's more like, "Let me get through this toughest time, then I'll talk to you about the past with a smile."

Maybe one day, when we face the past, all the sad emotions can be relieved. All the entanglements, hesitations, and confusion will no longer be a stone at the bottom of your heart.

Just as the saying goes: "When you've walked through the darkest tunnel, you'll no longer fear any dark night. You'll have the courage to face all kinds of challenges and the confidence to become a better person."

Whether it's joy or sorrow now, learn to heal yourself, then silently strive, shining like a star, surprising everyone.

How have you been lately? How's your mood? When you're feeling down, how do you console yourself?

These 10 signs that you are getting better

These 10 signs that you are getting better

1 Gradually getting savings

If you have read The Road to Financial Freedom, you will know that the first rule of happiness is to save money.

Old people love to save money, but in our generation, somehow, they have all become "negative" people. We borrow and overdraw for the future, and then use our present efforts to pay back our past spending.

Good saving habits will give you a sense of security and also give you more initiative in the world of "buying".

If you've graduated a few years ago and still don't have any savings, be sure to take note, but don't worry, start saving now.

2 Be able to get up early and go to bed early on your own initiative

The key to this one is "initiative".

A psychiatrist friend of mine once told me that the best way to treat depression is to give the patient a sense of control first.

I asked, "What is a sense of control?

He said, "It starts with taking the initiative to go to bed early and get up early.

Actually, going to bed early and waking up early is not so great. What is great is to take the initiative to go to bed early and wake up early for ten years.

In other words, you are not woken up by work or your boss, you want to go to bed early and get up early, you want to do something with your time in the morning.

Of course, it's also pretty awesome that you have to go to bed late and get up late on your own initiative for ten years as a whole.

3 Start accepting your imperfections

Everyone, in fact, has their own flaws.

But a person will focus more on his or her strengths and strategically ignore his or her weaknesses, which has two benefits.

Firstly, one can be more confident.

Secondly, one can put better energy into one's strengths.

In fact, the older one gets, the less likely one is to accept one's imperfections, but it is when one begins to accept one's imperfections that one will move towards perfection.

In one's twenties, one has to come to terms with one's imperfections.

In one's thirties, one accepts the imperfections of one's parents.

In one's forties one has to come to terms with the imperfections of one's children.

Imperfection is also a form of beauty.

4 Take the initiative to stop having friends with negative energy

The older you get, the more likely you are to see that negative people are actually lurking around you.

Many may be friends and relatives who are usually particularly close, but remember.

As you start to make the leap, you will find that you become more and more out of step with your old surroundings, and that those people you used to be very close to are instantly distant.

But don't worry, move on. Sometimes you don't have to cut off those friends, they will cut you off.

It's not a big deal, you just need to move on, and the brave will follow you on the road.

5 Start reading and exercising regularly

Apart from the dopamine production and the desire to learn, more importantly, you start to realise that there is more to life than just the little circle you were in.

A person who lies down all day will not know the kind of joy that comes from being on a treadmill.

Similarly, those who don't love reading will never understand how the world is seen by those who have knowledge in their brain.

6 Begin express yourself regularly

So, please start expressing and outputting regularly, for example, writing articles, which, at first, may not be read by many people, but as you write better and better and more, more people will read them.

7 Eat well at every meal

What is the most basic sign that a person is being alive?

The answer is to eat well at every meal.

You can take the initiative to choose some ingredients that will ensure you have three meals a day, with less sugar, lesser carbs and more high protein and vegetables.

The body is the carrier of the soul, when the body is finished, it's too late for everything.

8 Gradually start to be grateful for the world

I have a friend who send thank you to his loved ones everyday.

People can become particularly uncaring and ungrateful, taking everything for granted.

But once said, you feel the world is full of warmth, and really, if one is even grateful for every day one is alive, the state of being will change dramatically.

What's more, it's not just the person who is grateful that will actually benefit, it will be themselves.

Some studies have shown that a grateful person has a higher sense of well-being themselves than the person being thanked.

9 Understand the meaning of solitude

Solitude is the best period of appreciation, there will be a point when you do not have the accompaniment of your large circle of friends compared to now.

At the end of the day, people are meant to be alone. But there is one characteristic of masters: they are used to being alone, they enjoy it and they find a better version of themselves in it.

If you ask me what is the meaning of solitude, I think it is a kind of dialogue with oneself.

10 Knowing how to let go and not to cling to it

The last one is the most important, because almost all suffering comes from clinging to something or someone.

And as you begin to let go of that wrong person that you love so much

Letting go of that painful experience that you cannot change

Letting go of the things you hated but couldn't let go of

Congratulations, you've come out of it.

I hope this helps.

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Give yourself a chance to improve, believe that you can do better

You must work hard and persevere silently until you have achieved results

Before you produce any good grades, you must study, improve your abilities, and strengthen your skills. Everyone must work hard before they succeed. If you don't work hard, you will never get the affirmation and respect of others.

Others can just say that your work is wrong, and you have no ability to argue with others. But if you work hard to change silently, when you achieve certain results, even if what you say is wrong, others will think that what you said is right. Only when your professional level improves and your ability is affirmed by others, others will respect you and think you are a master. If you have no ability, everyone will look down on you, and you will not listen to what you say, and others will not listen to you, even if what you say is right, they will not listen to you. 

Achievements are the only reason to convince others. Only if you see your own problems, you can change to improve your abilities and make yourself stronger. It's a very simple truth. A successful person is surrounded by many people. Everyone will obey what he says and does. Even old people respect him. Similarly, when you have no grades or abilities, no one will take you seriously.

 

Before you have achieved results, don't tell others about your ability and strength, because if you have no ability, you have no achievements, and you simply don't have the ability to support you to argue with others, even if you are right. So before you have no achievement, only by doing things silently and doing things well, can you be affirmed and respected by others, and what you say has weight.

 

As a boss or as a leader or as a technical worker, you must have achievements in your profession and be able to do things well. If you can only talk, but has no actual action or ability, others will not obey you. Even if you are the leader, others will look down on you. Because they think that you don't have the ability but to rely on others to help you do it, and others will always respect the strong. Ordinary people like us work very hard and work very hard every day, but we have no achievement and no expertise. Only when you stand out and surpass others and are more professional than others, will you become the envy of others.

 

Maybe many people think that they are very capable but this is a wrong perception. Others don’t look at how strong you are but how much you have achieved. It is only when you have real materials and achievements, others will recognize you.

 

When you haven’t reached a certain height, don’t talk about your ideals with others, or talk about your own ideas. If you talk about it, others will only think it’s a joke. When you are incapable, you must learn to bow your head to study, improve yourself, and don't argue with others about right and wrong.

 

Learn to bow your head to study hard, improve yourself silently, don't be afraid of hard work, as long as you are willing to persevere, then one day you will amaze everyone!

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Be aware of your own weaknesses and strengths

Learn to manage your emotions

Each of us will have our own personality, our own temper, emotions. These good personal habits can make a person mature and become better. If you can't control your emotions well, it's easy to do wrong things and let yourself be negatively affected.

Since childhood, we have all been scolded and praised by adults. If you do something wrong and are blamed by adults, you will be unhappy and uncomfortable. Similarly, when you are praised, you will be happy, encouraged, and more willing to do things well. Children are innocent, and they will express their feelings. Each of us lives in a different environment, and the impact will be different. Adults will also be affected as long as they are together for a long time. If we are with people who are very positive and optimistic for a long time and will encourage you in everything, then you will do better and better. If you are with a group of people with long-term negative emotions, you will always complain and complain when you encounter problems. If you lose your temper and blame others, you will also be affected, and you will gradually become resentful and self-defeating. A positive and optimistic person is like the sun, which will radiate its heat to shine on others wherever it goes. A negative person is like the moon, which will make it dark and gloomy wherever it goes.

What kind of teacher will teach what kind of students, just like our parents and teachers were the most impactful when we were young. We spend the most time with our parents, so we are most influenced by them. Parents are our best teachers. There are many things that we cannot change. For example, our parents are something we cannot choose, and it is inevitable to be influenced by them since childhood. Many of our parents will have negative emotions that affect us, such as bad temper, blaming others for problems, shirking responsibility, and so on. Or we were scolded by our parents, Sometimes I can't control my emotions and quarrel with them. But you will regret it afterwards. Although their method is problematic, it is also for our own good. When we quarrel with them, not only can't solve the problem, but it will increase the family conflict.

We will also encounter many unsatisfactory things in society, being blamed by others, having disagreements with others, being wronged by others, and being criticized by leaders. Each of us will encounter these problems, but how can we deal with them better?  Quarrelling or fighting and quitting will not solve the problem at all, but will make it more serious.

We must learn to accept different opinions from others, learn to control our emotions, and learn to accept with humility when others say that you are not good. Even if you are right and others are wrong, don't argue with others too much, because this is fundamental It can't solve the problem, but it will affect your emotions and affect your judgment on things. When we sometimes make mistakes, they are caused by losing control of our emotions, being emotional, and losing rational judgment.

Some things are originally small things, but because of irrational and emotional loss of control, they will lead to big mistakes. For example, when two people bump into each other accidentally, everyone feels that they are not at fault, and one person is emotionally abusive and unreasonable, which will arouse the emotions of the other person, who may become more and more emotional and lose their minds and fight , At this time, one may lose emotional control and if no one persuades him, it may lead to a big mistake. If we can control our emotions and admit a mistake to others, even if it is not your fault, others will not hold on to it. Even if the other party is unreasonable and scolds you a few times, you ignore him, Things are over. .

We often watch some games, TV dramas, live broadcasts and so on, and we will find that those who don't know how to control their emotions are easy to make mistakes. I have seen some live broadcasts. Some people say that they can't stand arguing with others after a few words. Some people who can control their emotions, they just ignore them, and some people will laugh it off when they are scolded, and it will pass. The same thing is handled in different ways, and the results obtained are completely different.

Learning to control your emotions and manage your psychological changes will allow you to better judge the right and wrong of things and deal with problems better. Don't let your emotions control you; it will do you no good but bad. Problems that could have been easily dealt with can easily complicate the problem if you can't control your emotions. It is a science to manage your emotions well, and it allows you to improve and deal with problems better.

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Things you should never do

 

Things you should never do

1.    Sleep with your confidant.

2.    Marry your lover.

3.    Treat every colleague as a friend.

4.    Go to a friend's company to work.

5.     Reveal your real thoughts in front of the boss.

6.    Trust the boss's promise.

7.    Cannot hide emotions.

8.    Talk loudly on the mobile phone in a crowd.

9.    Get used to making excuses for yourself.

8 sentences that make you mature at least 5 years old

1.    If you don't like your current job, either quit your job or shut up.

2.    Learn to endure loneliness.

3.    Don't be as fragile as glass, be a person with a strong heart.

4.    Control your mouth, know what to say and what not to.

5.    Know how to create opportunities.

6.    If the phone does not ring, you should make a call.

7.    Don't marry hastily.

8.     Write down the things you want to do in your life, put the list in your wallet, and take it out often.

Habits of successful people

1.    Smile.

2.    Simple lifestyle

3.    Do not borrow money from friends.

4.    Say good things about others behind their backs.

5.    Just smile when you hear someone say bad things about others.

6.    Don't let people know all about your past.

7.    Respect people who don't like you.

8.    Be ruthless to things but affectionate to people.

9.    Do more self-criticism.

10.  Cheer for others.

11.  Be grateful.

12.  Learn to listen.

13.  Start with ‘we’ when speaking.

14.  Talk less.

15.  Like yourself.

 

15 Tips for Establishing Networks

1.    Learn to empathize

2.    Learn to adapt to the environment

3.    Learn to be generous

4.    Learn to be low-key

5.    Be sweet;

6.    Be polite

7.    Learn to be grateful

8.    Be punctual

9.    Keep promises

10.  Learn to be patient

11.  Have a normal heart

12.  Learn to praise others 

We must understand when we are young

1.    If you are not brave, no one will be strong for you. 

2.    Children without umbrellas must run harder! 

3.    If you chose the path, you have to walk it even though you need to kneel.

4.    I would rather run and be tripped countless times than walk in a comfortable life. smile proudly even if you failed.

Three Regrets in Life

1.    Can't choose , 

2.    don't insist on choosing,

3.    choose constantly

Three major traps in life

1.    carelessness,

2.    gullibility,

3.    greed

Three major tragedies in life

1.    do not learn when you meet good teachers,

2.    do not make friends when you meet good people

3.    do not grasp good opportunities when you meet them

Three great Incompetence in Life

1.    Do not compete with leaders,

2.    Do not compete with colleagues

3.    Do not compete with subordinates for merit. 

Signs of maturity

1.    No matter how sleepy you are in the morning, you will get up and go to work immediately; 

2.    Like to eat home-cooked meals more than restaurants outside;

3.    Watch news than entertainment news; 

4.    Call friends less often; 

5.    There are fewer and fewer people or things that can make you happy;

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Do you own all six types of wealth?

 

When it comes to wealth, you probably immediately think of money. Money is indeed a type of wealth, but it is not the only form of wealth. Money is only a low-level form of wealth. If you put all your energy on pursuing this low-level form of wealth, you will lose the opportunity to win other forms of wealth.

When it comes to wealth, what do you think of? The top ten richest people in the world? Your relative in Australia has a bigger house, a nicer car, and a cottage on the hill? Or the billionaire CEO of your company? Professional athlete, musician or movie star?

Of course, all of these people are "rich" from a financial standpoint.

But money does not monopolize wealth. The definition of wealth is "a substantial amount of valuable material property or resource", but looking at this definition, money is not listed as the only valuable property or resource.

Which resources you consider valuable is as important as the abundance of the resources themselves. The key is to optimize for the right form of wealth.

Money

Money is the simplest and most obvious form of wealth because it can be quantified.

How much is your annual salary? $100,000.

How much is your house? $500,000.

How much will your child's college tuition cost? $50,000.

How much is your portfolio worth? $250,000.

Forbes magazine keeps track of the world's richest people in real time, so everyone can see how much money the super rich have.

Because monetary wealth is so easy to recognize, it becomes a point of comparison. Money is the only form of wealth that makes you look at your neighbour and say "I'm richer/poorer than him".

Money can become a knee-jerk competition. Just like any other competition, we want to beat our peers. Earn more money. Get more property. Indulge in more fun. Do whatever it takes to win the game.

But there is a point that is often overlooked. At a certain point, money can become an attractive scoreboard, but a poor measure of wealth. Money has diminishing returns.

This makes sense if you stop and think about it. When income is low, extra money can make a huge difference in the way you live. Paying rent will be easier. You will have security. You can also afford to take a vacation or two.

However, as your income continues to increase, you can buy a bigger house, better car, better meals and better clothes, but that's it, you can't do anything new. You're just paying more for a more luxurious rendition of your current lifestyle. If you can pay your bills, spend your money on experiences, and save/invest the rest, then you're doing pretty well. Everything else is icing on the cake.

There's actually a nasty paradox associated with having a lot of wealth:

Some luxuries won't make your life better, but losing them after experiencing them will definitely make your life worse.

Some people put money and wealth first, and are desperate to pursue money and wealth. The biggest problem with this approach is the opportunity cost associated with it. How many hours did it take to increase revenue from $250,000 to $500,000? What about $1 million? What about $10 million? How much do you need to earn? What other forms of wealth would you have to sacrifice to achieve that goal?

Is this really the game you want to win?

Knowledge

Knowledge, like money, is a cumulative form of wealth. However, unlike money, the "knowledge" possessed by people is difficult to compare. A polyglot, a chef, a world-class investor are all knowledgeable, but not in the same form.

Different people have different ways of acquiring knowledge. Someone learned Spanish by not being afraid to speak it, no matter how bad it was. Someone became a master chef by trying a lot of disgusting recipes. Someone became a great athlete by being a rookie for a long time, trying to make a big business, playing a thousand games of chess, exchanging stories with others... all these can help you accumulate more knowledge.

You gain knowledge for working to develop your skills and expertise, and you earn money for using those skills and expertise to help others.

But knowledge is not just a tool used to create wealth, it is wealth itself.

Gaining knowledge should not be viewed solely as a means to help you achieve other goals. Knowledge is a worthy goal in itself.

Time

If money is the most obvious form of wealth, time is its opposite. Time is an asset you can't see. Time has no such things as expensive possessions and a good salary to show off. Time is so indifferent that you hardly notice it.

If monetary wealth is best shown through luxuries, the abundance of time is best shown through nothingness.

Money and wealth are shown to the world on scoreboards, but time is measured in an hourglass that no one can see, not even you. As we earn more and more money, monetary wealth increases but time becomes scarcer. When you are the poorest financially, you are the one with the most time, but when we have the time, we rarely notice.

We realize the value of time only when it is almost running out.

In theory, the currency has unlimited upside. The world's richest man, Elon Musk, is now worth more than $200 billion. But one day, someone (maybe Musk!) could be worth $500 billion, or even $1 trillion. There is nothing you can do about this possibility.

Time is just the opposite. Our time is strictly limited, our money generally increases with age, but our time decreases with age. You can't buy more time, and you never know how much time you have left.

If wealth is measured in increments of time, young people are richer than anyone. Of course it would be great to have $100 billion. But if you're young, how many years are you willing to sacrifice for Bezos' fortune?

Or how about we turn the question around? How much do you think Bezos is willing to give to trade places with someone like me who is 25 years old and will never become a billionaire? Maybe all of them. He has pledged to invest billions of dollars in life extension technology.

We tend to be unaware of the presence of oxygen when it’s plentiful, but when it’s scarce we desperately want more, and our sense of time does the same. Once the money is spent, you can earn it again. When your time runs out, it's game over.

Opportunity cost is everything, how much is your hourglass worth?

Health

Health is the cousin of time. Like time, health is seldom thought of when one is healthy. When we are young, we tend to have a lot of health. So we eat and drink, never exercise, it's okay, you're young. We will rejuvenate quickly no matter what.

For example, in college, no matter how hard you mess with your body, you'll probably be fine.

But decisions have compound effects.

In finance, compound interest is a powerful force. Someone who invests an extra $200 a month may not see a difference in the early years, but after 30 years they could be hundreds of thousands of dollars more than someone else.

The clock keeps ticking.

But the power of compound interest is not limited to finance. In fact, its most valuable application is in health.

Inattentiveness to your health when you are young may not notice any effects early on, but as you get older, taking a laissez-faire approach to your well-being can be disastrous. What you eat starts to matter more and more. Whether or not you exercise starts to matter more and more.

As you age, your complexion darkens, your metabolism slows, and underlying health problems become more serious. At this point, the decisions you've made about your health start to snowball.

Like time, we rarely think about it when we have it. But what about when you lose it? Health will become the only thing you can think about. There is a saying that goes, "A healthy person has a thousand wishes, but a sick person has only one wish."

And that patient rarely gets his wish.

When you're broke but healthy, you have countless options. What's the point if you're rich but bedridden? What's the use of having a billion dollars if you have nothing to enjoy?

Relationship

If you lack relationships, all other forms of wealth become irrelevant. What's the use of asking for the money if there's no one to share it with you? Of course, you can go all the way to darkness on the road of single material enjoyment, but this will not bring you a sense of satisfaction.

The value of time and health depends on your ability to spend time with the people you care about. Otherwise, you're wasting your unscheduled schedule and capable body on frivolous distractions.

It's good to have a lot of knowledge, but it's best to share that knowledge with others. The only difference between a master and a hermit is whether there are students or not.

Humans are social animals, and relationships are vital to our psyche. We need people who can laugh and cry together. People were able to share their dreams, stories and fears. You can fall in love and suffer the baptism of falling out of love. Can create new memories. You can drive 1000 kilometers on a road trip together, across the east coast of the United States.

Every little thing we do comes back to relationships.

The greatest value of health is that it gives you choice.

A life rich in all other respects but devoid of relationships can be at best empty and at worst depressing. What's the point of having the world if there's no one to share it with? If it means living in one's castle, do you really want to be king of that castle?

Experience

"The purpose of life is to experience something that you will be nostalgic for later."

I generally agree with this view. Life is about a 90-year period of experience defined by various other smaller experiences. We are fortunate to live in a time when experiences are readily available, more accessible than ever.

You can travel anywhere in the world in 24 hours for less than $1,000. From learning a foreign language to learning exotic recipes, you can learn anything on the internet. For the first time ever, we can literally do anything.

If wealth is for consumption, what better way to spend your wealth of money, wealth of time, wealth of knowledge, wealth of health, wealth of relationships than doing cool things with people you care about?

At the end of the day, our experiences are all we have.

Experiences are our chances to cash in other forms of wealth for something memorable.

Some experiences cost money, but the most valuable experiences are not defined by price tags. I don't remember how much it cost to visit Tromsø, Norway. But what about seeing the Northern Lights? Priceless.

An evening spent with cold beer, loud music, a roaring fire and surrounded by friends is priceless.

Going on road trips across the American West with my best friend was priceless.

Of all the trade-offs a person can make, you will never regret exchanging financial wealth for experiential wealth. But what about missing out on experiences because you're "too busy at work"? It's hardly worth it.

As a resource, money is unlimited, but experiences, like time, are finite.

How often do you have dinner with your grandparents? What about going on a ski trip with your best friend? How many times have you had the chance to visit a new country on a whim? What about learning a new skill you've always been interested in?

Communicating with Argentines in their native language is invaluable.

Money is best used to fund the experiences you want. Go try something fun. The kind that lights a fire in your heart.

Imagine if you spent 40 years maximizing your lower forms of wealth (money) at the expense of minimizing some higher form of wealth (experiences), and waited until your twilight years to recapture the experiences you had missed, it is only in vain.

Our goal should be to have a lot of money and a rich life experience.

When you come to the end of your life, would you rather be able to fondly recall the good times you spent with the people you cared about, or would you be satisfied that you didn't "waste time and money" on these "trivial" pursuits ?

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You must have peeled an onion, right?

You must have peeled an onion, right?

 

When you peel the "onion" layer by layer, you will find that it has no core.

This is the opposite of the "avocado" personality, the "onion" personality.

As long as there is a little negative feedback from the outside world, it breaks down inside and feels bad.

There is this person, A.

A has always liked fashion. After graduation, she joined an internationally renowned clothing company and was employed in front-line sales.

When relatives and classmates knew that she had become a salesperson, they despise her because it seems degrading for a graduate student to be a salesperson, putting on shoes and trying on clothes for others!"

Some mean classmates deliberately came to the store to let her serve them, taking the opportunity to put her down.

Although her income was good, she couldn't stand the ridicule of others and chose to resign.

Then she went to a government agency and stayed in an administrative position for ten years.

And the colleagues who were "salesperson" like her at the beginning, one became a company executive and the other became a fashion blogger.

Looking at her boring life day after day, she began to regret it:

"If I didn't give up at the beginning and persisted, I don't know what will happen now?"

One is always the protagonist of his own, and he should not always play a supporting role in other people's dramas.

What others think is good may not be suitable for you; what others despise may not necessarily be wrong.

Others can only judge your life, but they will not pay for your sorrows and joys, let alone be responsible for your life. SO you are the one who can decide for yourself.

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