Showing posts with label life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label life. Show all posts

Friday, December 22, 2023

Each of us should be responsible for making ourselves better

Have you ever think of what is the meaning of life? You may not have time to think about it, especially when you are busy every day, and days pass without knowing it. When you calm down one day, you can't help but think about these questions, why are you busy every day, what are you busy with, what problems did you solve, or make yourself better?

I feel like I am lost and have no direction on some days, and sometimes I feel that I have a clear goal, but I don’t know how to go forward. Especially when there is nothing to do, and it feels meaningless to do anything. Many people may encounter this situation, but after a few days when the mood improves, they will return to the old way.

We should make some time for ourselves, sit down and think about the meaning of our life. Some people may think that this is a question that people will think about when they are depressed. We should learn to take the initiative to think about these issues. We don’t have to worry about wars, our three meals a day, or where even to live. What we have to think about is how we can live a better life, or make our family life better. We should be grateful that we can live in this beautiful era, and we should cherish this beautiful life even more. Why are other people living better and better but not me? It is our irresponsibility to ourselves and our irresponsibility to our family.

Just because we live in the best time, we don't know how to struggle, don't know how to work hard, As long as we have food and shelter every day, we forget our origins. Our ancestors used their lives and their youth to buy us a good time, but we eat and drink every day. We play games and watch TV shows with our mobile phones. Just forgetting to work hard and forget to learn and progress for a while is actually irresponsible to oneself.

We must learn to protect ourselves and learn to make ourselves stronger. This is our responsibility. We don't bully the weak, but we also don't allow others to bully us. What's wrong with us is that we lack fighting spirit, our ancestors survived such difficult times, but now we don't have the courage to stand up. The economy of others is getting better and better. It's time for us to wake up; we should at least be responsible for our own better lives.

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Learn to be down-to-earth when your ability can't support your dreams

Friday, December 1, 2023

You must work hard and persevere silently until you have achieved results

Before you produce any good grades, you must study, improve your abilities, and strengthen your skills. Everyone must work hard before they succeed. If you don't work hard, you will never get the affirmation and respect of others.

Others can just say that your work is wrong, and you have no ability to argue with others. But if you work hard to change silently, when you achieve certain results, even if what you say is wrong, others will think that what you said is right. Only when your professional level improves and your ability is affirmed by others, others will respect you and think you are a master. If you have no ability, everyone will look down on you, and you will not listen to what you say, and others will not listen to you, even if what you say is right, they will not listen to you. 

Achievements are the only reason to convince others. Only if you see your own problems, you can change to improve your abilities and make yourself stronger. It's a very simple truth. A successful person is surrounded by many people. Everyone will obey what he says and does. Even old people respect him. Similarly, when you have no grades or abilities, no one will take you seriously.

 

Before you have achieved results, don't tell others about your ability and strength, because if you have no ability, you have no achievements, and you simply don't have the ability to support you to argue with others, even if you are right. So before you have no achievement, only by doing things silently and doing things well, can you be affirmed and respected by others, and what you say has weight.

 

As a boss or as a leader or as a technical worker, you must have achievements in your profession and be able to do things well. If you can only talk, but has no actual action or ability, others will not obey you. Even if you are the leader, others will look down on you. Because they think that you don't have the ability but to rely on others to help you do it, and others will always respect the strong. Ordinary people like us work very hard and work very hard every day, but we have no achievement and no expertise. Only when you stand out and surpass others and are more professional than others, will you become the envy of others.

 

Maybe many people think that they are very capable but this is a wrong perception. Others don’t look at how strong you are but how much you have achieved. It is only when you have real materials and achievements, others will recognize you.

 

When you haven’t reached a certain height, don’t talk about your ideals with others, or talk about your own ideas. If you talk about it, others will only think it’s a joke. When you are incapable, you must learn to bow your head to study, improve yourself, and don't argue with others about right and wrong.

 

Learn to bow your head to study hard, improve yourself silently, don't be afraid of hard work, as long as you are willing to persevere, then one day you will amaze everyone!


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Be aware of your own weaknesses and strengths


Friday, November 17, 2023

Learn to manage your emotions

Each of us will have our own personality, our own temper, emotions. These good personal habits can make a person mature and become better. If you can't control your emotions well, it's easy to do wrong things and let yourself be negatively affected.

Since childhood, we have all been scolded and praised by adults. If you do something wrong and are blamed by adults, you will be unhappy and uncomfortable. Similarly, when you are praised, you will be happy, encouraged, and more willing to do things well. Children are innocent, and they will express their feelings. Each of us lives in a different environment, and the impact will be different. Adults will also be affected as long as they are together for a long time. If we are with people who are very positive and optimistic for a long time and will encourage you in everything, then you will do better and better. If you are with a group of people with long-term negative emotions, you will always complain and complain when you encounter problems. If you lose your temper and blame others, you will also be affected, and you will gradually become resentful and self-defeating. A positive and optimistic person is like the sun, which will radiate its heat to shine on others wherever it goes. A negative person is like the moon, which will make it dark and gloomy wherever it goes.

What kind of teacher will teach what kind of students, just like our parents and teachers were the most impactful when we were young. We spend the most time with our parents, so we are most influenced by them. Parents are our best teachers. There are many things that we cannot change. For example, our parents are something we cannot choose, and it is inevitable to be influenced by them since childhood. Many of our parents will have negative emotions that affect us, such as bad temper, blaming others for problems, shirking responsibility, and so on. Or we were scolded by our parents, Sometimes I can't control my emotions and quarrel with them. But you will regret it afterwards. Although their method is problematic, it is also for our own good. When we quarrel with them, not only can't solve the problem, but it will increase the family conflict.

We will also encounter many unsatisfactory things in society, being blamed by others, having disagreements with others, being wronged by others, and being criticized by leaders. Each of us will encounter these problems, but how can we deal with them better?  Quarrelling or fighting and quitting will not solve the problem at all, but will make it more serious.

We must learn to accept different opinions from others, learn to control our emotions, and learn to accept with humility when others say that you are not good. Even if you are right and others are wrong, don't argue with others too much, because this is fundamental It can't solve the problem, but it will affect your emotions and affect your judgment on things. When we sometimes make mistakes, they are caused by losing control of our emotions, being emotional, and losing rational judgment.

Some things are originally small things, but because of irrational and emotional loss of control, they will lead to big mistakes. For example, when two people bump into each other accidentally, everyone feels that they are not at fault, and one person is emotionally abusive and unreasonable, which will arouse the emotions of the other person, who may become more and more emotional and lose their minds and fight , At this time, one may lose emotional control and if no one persuades him, it may lead to a big mistake. If we can control our emotions and admit a mistake to others, even if it is not your fault, others will not hold on to it. Even if the other party is unreasonable and scolds you a few times, you ignore him, Things are over. .

We often watch some games, TV dramas, live broadcasts and so on, and we will find that those who don't know how to control their emotions are easy to make mistakes. I have seen some live broadcasts. Some people say that they can't stand arguing with others after a few words. Some people who can control their emotions, they just ignore them, and some people will laugh it off when they are scolded, and it will pass. The same thing is handled in different ways, and the results obtained are completely different.

Learning to control your emotions and manage your psychological changes will allow you to better judge the right and wrong of things and deal with problems better. Don't let your emotions control you; it will do you no good but bad. Problems that could have been easily dealt with can easily complicate the problem if you can't control your emotions. It is a science to manage your emotions well, and it allows you to improve and deal with problems better.

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Learn to keep things simple, the less the better

Friday, October 20, 2023

14 workplace golden rules, which can effectively help you survive in the workplace better

1. There are only two types of people in the office, the protagonist and the secondary characters

In the workplace, if you want to live a relaxed life and don't want to climb up the ladder, you can only be a secondary character for your lifetime. The disadvantage of playing a secondary character is: you will die first without any credit. Considered first during layoffs. The current workplace is definitely not a place to raise lazy people. If you want to survive better than others, you have to be the protagonist and let others be the secondary character.

2. Everyone must have great ambitions, even if they want to destroy the world

Ambitiousness is the first condition to be a protagonist. In the workplace, if you don’t have a goal, you won’t be able to climb up the ladder aggressively, and in the end you can only become a secondary character and a victim of others. So whether you want to destroy the world or become the richest man, you must have ambitions and take this as your goal.

3. Don't be fooled by ideals, ideals are needed, but not others' ideals, but your own

When mentioning great ambitions, some people will think of corporate goals, corporate culture, and impassioned speeches from the boss. Forget about those, the boss's ideal is only the boss's, but in the workplace, you are independent. Keep a clear head and not be easily fooled. No matter what ideals others have, you must firmly remember your own ambitions, which is the foundation of your life.

4. If you really have no ambition, then fight for money

Everyone wants to retire, no one will want to work for others for life. So making money is the most important pursuit of people. A very dangerous situation in the workplace is that the boss uses ideals to win over people and wants people to work for nothing without money. But if you are really willing to work without money, then you are worthless. Since you are worthless, what is the need for existence? Money is the only thing that measures your worth. If you really do not have ideals, then strive to make money.

5. You may not be smart, but you cannot be careless

The workplace is the same, you can be not smart, but you can't be careless. People who are not smart are at most clumsy and do worse things. And in the workplace, it's not a great sin. But if you are not careful, you will violate the interests of others at any time, and commit the taboo of offending others in the workplace. Keep your mouth shut, don't talk about your colleagues when you can, and don't say bad things when you can say good things about people.

6. The boss will know everything you say. So think about what to say and what not to say

Don't expect your boss not to hear what you say in private. The boss knows everything, that's the truth. It's exactly the same in the workplace, as long as you're not talking to yourself, you have to worry about the person you're talking to getting word out. And experience tells us that every comment about the company will eventually reach the ears of the boss. So when you talk to anyone, think carefully about what to say and what not to say. Never say what you shouldn't say, and shut up what you don't want to say.

7. Playing stupid is always the least likely to make mistakes no matter when

When someone asks you to make decisions, no matter how you choose, it is wrong. Then pretending to be stupid is the best choice, which is the least error-prone way when you have no choice. Don't worry about being stupid, even if everyone sees that you're being stupid, they still can't do anything about you. Those who are really unlucky are those who have made decisions.

8. Thinking of yourself as the smartest person is often the stupidest

In the workplace, always thinking of yourself as the smartest person is always a secondary character. A truly smart person is one who can be a fool or shrewd as and when necessary.

9. You must have a backing, but what is more reliable than a backing is to make yourself valuable

Therefore, in the workplace, building a good relationship with your bosses is a must, and it is very important to find a good backing for yourself. And more importantly than that, make yourself worth enough that every boss has to win you over.

10. You belong to the boss, but the boss does not necessarily belong to you.

When a boss tells you that you belong to him, you must be clear in your heart that the boss is not yours. You are his and he is his. When your affairs conflict with the interests of your superiors, they will betray you without hesitation. Always remember that you are your own and only you can be responsible for yourself. Don't believe the boss's words of pretending to be close, it will be a trap at any time.

11. The boss says he is very reassuring about you, but the fact may be just the opposite

If the boss is really at ease with you, he doesn't need to mention it often. True trust is shown through actions. When the boss is willing to do things that hurt others and fight in the workplace with you, that is a manifestation of trust. But the boss verbally said that he is relieved with you, but he should be careful. It is very likely that you have done something to make the boss suspect that you are unfaithful.

12. Think about problems from the standpoint of the boss, and do things from the standpoint of oneself

When your boss trusts you and asks you to do something, you must have a ruler, and don't do everything stupidly. You have to think about the problem from the standpoint of the boss, understand why the boss does it, and what purpose it can achieve. Then make a decision based on your own position, some do it, some shirk it. Choose to do things that are in your own interests, and evade ideas that are not in your interests. Please use what you do to please your boss, and let your boss know that you have done your best by what you don't do.

13. There must be shortcomings

In the workplace, there must be flaws. A perfect person with no flaws will be hated and respected by others. If even your boss keeps you at arm's length, your career path will be in danger. So smart people will deliberately expose some shortcomings, especially innocuous ones, so that the boss thinks he can handle you, and that is the safest situation. But the shortcomings must not be fatal, but they cannot be your real weaknesses.

14. Everyone is on the side of evil, because everyone has their own good

Finally, a word about ideals. Everyone has their own ideals, and what is good for their own ideals is good, and what is not conducive to other people's ideals is evil. Because people have different positions and different needs. So in the eyes of others, you must stand on the side of evil. You are always your own good and others' evil.

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30 Tips for a Minimalist Life

Get a FREE copy of: Retire with a Plan A Step-by-Step Guide to Building Your Ideal Retirement Lifestyle for a limited time only.

Friday, October 13, 2023

30 Tips for a Minimalist Life

1. Making money is the most effective way to protect yourself and those around you.

2. Don't look down on anyone. Many people who wear slippers may be millionaires.

3. People who suffer the most are often the most sober.

4. Broken love is not terrible; it is just paving the way for the arrival of true love.

5. For ordinary people with no background and no resources, insisting on doing one thing can make you surpass 90% of your peers.

Singing, painting, writing, design, etc., find a hobby that you can stick to for more than 10 years, and keep cultivating. There may be no improvement in the first two years. After 5 years, you will get a huge return. After 10 years, you can put this  Do things to the extreme, surpassing the lives and achievements of 90% of your peers.

6. Action is the best way to improve your personality. You may not be able to see anything for a few days, but after a few years, your enthusiasm will spread to a certain extent, and many people will be willing to work hard with you.

7. There are four things in life that you must never do: Don't just take the easy road; Don't try to change others; Don't dare to start because you are afraid of failure; Never have a temper that is greater than your ability.

8. Don't let yourself stop for a long time. Once you get used to being comfortable, you will lose the ability to seek change and eventually become a person abandoned by the times.

9. Wealth is conserved, and the amount of money you make is positively related to the value you provide.

10. It is easy to give up, but it must be cool to persist. Fate will fail a person who works hard, but never fail a person who has been working hard. Treat yourself better, and be cruel to yourself.

11. The easy way is downhill.

12. It's not that you can't find love, but you can't hold on to love. until you think your love is not the love of your life.

13. Reading a book does not change, but if you keep reading, there will be. Reading is not for eloquence, nor for superiority, but for maintaining independent thinking and keeping a sober mind in a noisy world.

14. Adults can choose to do anything, this is your freedom. Provided that, to think clearly whether you can bear the consequences and the price.

15. True self-confidence comes from fully accepting yourself. otherwise, you will only admire the strong and despise the weak.

16. Salary is always linked to authority. Talking to the leader about salary increase is worse than increasing authority.

17. The horoscope of interpersonal communication: ignore prejudice and stay away from prejudice. People who have prejudice against you, no matter what you do or say, he will oppose you. To avoid these troubles, not explaining or arguing is the best counterattack.

18. In the face of small groups, a neutral relationship is the safest. Don't rush to stand in line, neither good nor bad to people. Because a small group formed for the purpose of isolation will inevitably split again for the purpose of isolation.

If you support him to isolate others today, tomorrow he may unite with others and begin to isolate you. This is due to human nature.

19. In the implementation stage, I am most afraid of having scruples. Just do the planned things, don't always think about it, waste time and torture yourself.

20. People with high emotional intelligence never deliberately please others, but always please themselves.

21. Never lie to yourself. It is much easier to deceive yourself than to deceive others, but it is much more difficult to wake yourself up than to wake up others.

22. The most cost-effective business is to invest in yourself. A shrewd person spends money to improve, but a foolish person only spends money to enjoy, and sit back and eat.

23. To maintain lifelong learning, don't stand still. When the times abandon you, they won't say goodbye to you. If you don't make progress, it is the biggest regression.

24. You try your best to run forward, not to change the world, but to not be abandoned by the world.

25. Be yourself. You can become someone in one day.  Everyone is born an original, don't let yourself live as a pirated version.

26. Don't pin your happiness on others. Because people will change and love will disperse. The road of life is always to be walked by yourself, no one can replace your happiness, and no one can pay for your happiness. Self-sufficient happiness will not worry about gains and losses.

27. Let go of the love that makes yourself humble. For the purpose of love, is to make yourself better, not to scar you all over.

After all, some love can be met but never sought. Those who cannot wait should not wait, and the world that cannot be squeezed in should not hold on.

28. Always keep 30% of the mystery for yourself. Only then will others see a side of you they didn't expect, and you will always bring something new to others. This rule applies to all relationships.

29. 99% of all the people you meet in your life are strangers. So, relax, you don't have that many viewers.

30. If you can't say good things, avoid bad things or shut up. I am afraid that what you say unintentionally will be deliberately interpreted by people with ulterior motives.

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The top level of self-discipline: "Never expose, but stay away, and quietly eliminate you.”

Friday, September 29, 2023

Some tips to improve your emotional intelligence

1. Don't play with your phone while others are talking.

2. Inviting guests to a meal is equivalent to sharing. The invited person will forget about it after eating, and will not appreciate it, unless you invite a luxurious meal that he has never eaten before.

3. When you go to someone’s house as a guest, the owner of the other party doesn’t say too much, or even reminds you to drink water, or suggests watching TV, you should leave, because people always feel that they have nothing to say. Remind others to do something that doesn't matter.

4. Another day actually means forget it.

5. Before giving friend A’s contact information to friend B, it is best to ask friend A’s consent, because sometimes your friend A may not want to be disturbed by friend B, out of politeness, you’d better confirm with friend A.

6. In the office or dormitory, buy some snacks and share with everyone. A dozen of snacks can make you gain the favour of a group of people. 

7. It is very impolite to interrupt other people's speech, but if you are often interrupted by others, you should think about whether you are talking too much nonsense.

8. The less likely to get angry, it means that he has more trump cards in his hand. On the contrary, if he loses his temper at every turn, it means that he has no trump cards in his hand and only has the ability to lose his temper. The reason why people get emotional and lose their temper, that's all because of helpless actions after having no other way.

9. Um, ah, oh, these three words are the most perfunctory replies in the chat, you can either reply yes, or reply um, these are better than replying with one word.

10. Don't always think about changing yourself to cater to others.

You want to read books, but everyone is playing games. In order to integrate into them, you also play games. In the end, you fail the exam together.

11. Make money the most important thing before you are 30 years old. Don’t think about useless things. Put away your usual groaning. Only when the money is in place will you discover how beautiful the world is.

12. Your good temper, obedience, and honesty are only useful in school, and will only be liked by teachers and classmates. In society, most people don’t care whether you are good to him or not. They only care about whether they are good or not, so they often make a mess, Bad things will be given to honest people.

13. If you send a piece of text to the other party, if you don’t add emoticons or emoticons, sometimes it will cause the other party to misunderstand, because different people may have different interpretations of the same piece of text, but remember, do Don't add a smiley [smiling] emoji.

14. People who are taken advantage of and pretend to be fine are the most stupid.

You think that your good temper and tolerance can bring you a good impression, but in the eyes of others, you will only think that you are honest, easier to bully, and will take advantage of you next time. The more you treat others, the more you have no bottom line.

15. When the personality of the people around him changes a lot, either he has read a lot of books, or he has been hit hard. A person with a lively personality who loves to talk suddenly becomes silent, autistic, and cautious. , He must have experienced pain that you can't imagine.

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What are some simple principles of interpersonal communication?

Friday, September 22, 2023

What are some simple principles of interpersonal communication?

1. Popular people are generally lively, cheerful, versatile, and more eye-catching in the crowd. You don't have to please everyone in order to be popular.  

 

2. Eighty percent of interpersonal communication is the exchange of interests. When it's time to talk about interests, don't talk about feelings. See this clearly, don't let people treat you as an ATM, but you treat them as your best friend.  

 

3. People will make all kinds of friends because of loneliness and not adapting to the new environment. But as long as your natures are different, the final outcome will inevitably be drifting away.  

 

4. No one likes to be educated. If it's not for a true friend, don't make suggestions and criticisms easily. The result is usually that the two sides do not get any benefits, but turn against each other.  

 

5. Good listening is the secret to maintaining friendship.  

 

6. Everyone grows up in different environments and has different values, so they have different requirements for things big and small in life. So don't judge others by yourself, you may touch the bottom line of the other party- even if that bottom line is not very important to you.  

 

7. "Politeness is a trick that costs nothing, and only a fool would be stingy." - Schopenhauer  

 

8. You don't have to be popular, especially if you're an introvert. Finding your own circle of friends and rhythm is better than blindly imitating those successful books.

 

9. The ultimate goal of making friends is to enhance the spiritual realm of both parties and beautify life. If your friendship makes you miserable, please let go. A person can also be very happy. 

 

10. Don't trust the other party's company and commitment. You can keep it in mind, but don't rely entirely on it. When you encounter difficulties, you can still go by yourself.  

 

11. As the old saying goes, "It's easy to add flowers to the cake, but hard to send charcoal in the snow." When you are doing well, so-called friends come in doves, all of them are like your best relatives; when you lose your light, they will leave. Remember this, don't get drunk on so-called popularity. Most people aren't going to be your real friends - they're not close to you because they like you, they're close to you because they like themselves and want to promote themselves.  

 

12. Don't just hang out with those friends who are full of sweet words, praise and praise, and don't talk to you. Be able to accommodate the existence of critical friends.  

 

13. Childhood friendships are pure, but social friendships are sometimes full of exploitation and deceit. You don't know if the other person likes you or is jealous of you. 

 

14. Ugly women are not without benefits: Everyone tends to choose some people who can complement themselves when making friends.  

 

15. Make friends with those who are opposite to your personality and have certain similarities as friends, which can supplement the temperament and energy you are naturally lacking.  

 

16. People will change. It is normal for friends who have not seen each other for many years to have nothing to say. As long as you grow up, it is impossible not to face this.  

 

17. When making friends, it’s not just enough to share similar interests, but also to slowly examine each other’s values. Something deep inside him may be very different from yours.  

 

18. Ideally, friendship should be equal. But if your friend is disrespectful to you (no kidding), shouts, or doesn't care about your feelings, they may be putting themselves above you. For this situation, the best way is to disconnect.  

 

19. A friend who goes through adversity together is a friend forever. Therefore, instead of leaving your friend in distress, you should be more attentive to him.  

 

20. What kind of friends you make, what kind of person you are generally. The flaws in the friends you hate may be in you too. A lot of introspection is conducive to interpersonal harmony.  

 

21. Once you identify a friend, remind yourself to learn to tolerate.  

 

22. The older you get, the more lonely you will be. Because at this time people no longer have a common goal, and the competition is more intense. Don't worry too much. Learn to be alone.  

 

23. Being bad-tempered or speaking harshly will reduce points in the dating market. Although it is often natural, it is difficult to maintain intimacy without restraint. Because it's usually the closest people who hurt the most.  

 

24. It is difficult for people who don't understand or like reciprocity to have many friends.  

 

25. Making friends also depends on fate, just like love, which cannot be forced.  

 

26. Time will tell who your true friends are.  

 

27. The ancients said that it is enough to have a confidant in life. In other words, it is very likely that you will not have a soul friend in your life.  

 

28. No matter how lively, smart, funny, and attractive a person is at first sight, if he does not have a kind and loving heart, he is not the best candidate for a good friend. You may gradually find that ta doesn't care about your friend at all. Ta did not feel sorry for you, but you misunderstood ta. In short, friends who are excellent on one hand are not necessarily good on the other.  

 

29. No matter how good a friend is, you may hate him for a while, just like a mother sometimes wants to strangle her child. Be patient for a while and don't be too blunt. In the end, you may find out that you are actually the aunt, or that your hormones are out of balance.  

 

30. The more intimate people are, the easier it is to hate and get bored. Refer to between parents. This deviation must be consciously avoided.  

 

31. If you do not understand the other party, it is best not to judge rashly, which will expose your ignorance and self-righteousness. If no one is asking for your opinion, it's best to observe in silence first. 

 

32. When someone is in a bad mood, don't ask too many questions, pat him, then leave, and give him his personal space.  

 

33. Most people in modern society don't like to be known about their privacy, so it's safer not to take the initiative to ask. 

 

34. You don't need to change your position for the sake of your friends, just say what you think. You may drift away from this, or you may gain understanding, and nothing happens in the end. In short, go with the flow.  

 

35. Some sincere small gifts can bring your friends a whole day of happiness. Don't be stingy with compliments, especially if your friend is holding back.  

 

36. Be polite to strangers. Of course, if you are willing to treat others with enthusiasm and help others, that's even better. Sometimes life will add unexpected joy because of this.  

 

37. For those who are higher than you, it is best to be cautious and not expose yourself too much. Remember to be neither humble nor overbearing.  

 

38. For those who are lower than you, it is best to be kind, because it is not easy for everyone, and giving roses to others has a lingering fragrance in your hands.  

 

39. People who bring sunshine, hope and spiritual strength to others will unconsciously surround themselves with a large group of people. So, you can try to be that kind of person.  

 

40. Do what you can, and you won't lose too much of your favor. You must try your best to help. this point is very important.  

 

41. When you are with a large group of people, don't put your phone outside.  

 

42. Don't impose what you think is right on others. People's thoughts are not easily changed, and this will only produce counterproductive effects. If you come across such a person, ignore it.  

 

43. Don't have the desire to control others' words and deeds, because everyone needs autonomy, and the most unbearable thing is to lose the right to autonomy. If you find that your friend is trying to control your attitude with praise, threats, judgment, indifferent, etc., you should bring it up, or leave, and let him know: this is wrong behavior.  

 

44. Listen to half of what other people say. There are always a lot of exaggeration and subjective will, not necessarily accurate.  

 

45. Take the praise and criticism of others lightly, and don't rely on others to build your sense of self. Never lose yourself in any relationship.  

 

46. ​​No matter how good the relationship is, generally don't do other people's things without authorization. Maybe in his heart, your relationship is not as good as you imagined, and your behavior undoubtedly closed the door of the other party's heart.  

 

47. When someone confides in you, know that it's not that they don't know how to solve the problem, they just want some reassurance and attention. Mistakes are common among people.  

 

48. The intimate relationship between men and women usually follows the principle that if they get together quickly, they will also break up quickly. And the relationship that can really last for a long time is usually the mutual attraction of souls, coupled with patient maintenance.  

 

49. No matter how good the relationship is, it needs regular maintenance and deepening, otherwise it will change.  

 

50. Put the most energy on improving your value: whether it is appearance and figure, talent learning, or personality charm. This is the basis of interpersonal attraction.  

 

51. Don't promise others anything easily. Once promised, you must do it to maintain your reputation.  

 

52. There are all kinds of small circles in life all the time. Don't be sad if you don't fit in. For you, these are passing days and only seem important for a certain period of time. The reason may be your vanity or loneliness. The same is true for many people, for you, it is just a nodding acquaintance for a while. Don't take it too seriously, and don't be afraid of offending people.  

 

53. In the workplace, reliability is a gold medal of interpersonal relationship more than anything else.  

 

54. You can pursue the trend, but don't be biased by the trend that others tout; you can pursue gregariousness, but don't stop studying hard because of your roommate's opinion. Your life is still your own, and others will not bear the bitter fruit for you.  

 

55. People who are not psychologically mature tend to place too much emphasis on the so-called interpersonal relationship, so that they spend too much energy on useless work.  

 

56. The "social circle" is useless. Those casual acquaintances are not worth the painstaking maintenance.  

 

57. Many times jokes can lead to bad results. A joke that is acceptable to you may sound insulting to others. Or you clearly regard the other party as a friend, but he feels that you are looking down on him. Joking is a difficult skill.  

 

58. Except for your parents, no one actually cares about you so much, so don't feel sad because others are neglected. Likewise, don't show off too much when you're proud - you might piss off some acquaintances.  

 

59. In general, the daily attitude is best to be low-key, because people like people who are modest and don't boast about themselves..  

 

60. Be humble. 

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6 truths about interpersonal communication

Friday, September 15, 2023

6 truths about interpersonal communication

1.    You offend people not because you say something wrong, but because you say something right.

2.    Try not to educate or persuade others. If you persuade someone who is poorer than you, he will only think you are lying to him and will not believe you.

3.    "Sad" is because you do not respect the principle of value exchange, "angry" is because you have not experienced enough, "complain" is because your current status is too bad, and you have not tried your best to reverse the situation. This is the essence.

4.    The essence of interpersonal relationship is not to help each other, but to use each other. For example, a person will not repay you because you are kind to him. However, he will definitely bow to you because you hold the "good" he wants in the future.

5.    When we are still weak, if anyone doubts us, don't refute, let alone persuade others to change their views, this is simply unrealistic. If you want to do it, do it without talking to anyone. Let the results speak for themselves.

6.    If you want to stay focused, ask yourself two questions when encountering messy issues: First, does this matter have anything to do with me? Second, can I get money? You will find that 99.99% of things can be thrown aside. Simple and crude, but very effective.

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Friday, September 8, 2023

The gap between others and you is not at work but after work

When I went to work a few days ago, I heard a worker tell her own experience. Although it was a very ordinary story, I found it very inspirational.


She is from an ordinary family, and she is the only child in the family, so her parents hope that she can have more children, saying that one child is too lonely, and in addition to the pressure of life now, the pressure on children will be even greater in the future. She herself said that she was too foolish and filial. In order to listen to her parents, she ignored the opposition of her husband's family and had more children.


For the sake of the family, she and her husband work hard every day. When she goes to work, she does not take leave, because she feels that if she takes a day off, she will not be paid a day, and she does several jobs every day. Go to the breakfast shop in the morning to sell breakfast for an hour, and then go to work. At night, she goes back to as delivery driver after work, and she can only go home to rest at one or two o'clock in the evening. What she said was that a person's greatest confidence is to have money, even if you have a husband and someone to help you, but you have to know how to make money yourself, others are unreliable, only the money you earn can be at ease when you spend it with your heart.

After their hard work, she is living a good life now, and the days are getting better and better. Although it is not as difficult as before, she still works hard, is more diligent, and insists on being a delivery driver after returning from work every day. From her confident and optimistic smile, it can be seen that she is living a good life and happy now.

As for other people, as long as they are diligent, they will have a good life. In fact, there is not much difference between each of us. What really widens the gap is everyone's cognition, ability to do things, and attitude.

Each of us has our own thoughts and opinions on everything, which depends on everyone's cognition. Cognition is the ability to recognize one thing. For example, there is a big cognitive gap between old people and young people, young people and children, farmers and workers, workers and leaders, leaders and children. Only when your cognition reaches a certain level can you change your identity and status. Everyone who wants to change himself must first improve his cognitive ability. Only when his cognition changes can he change himself. It’s very simple, if we ordinary people don’t learn to change and improve our cognitive ability, we may go on like this for the rest of our life, and you can see what you will be like in the future when you look up. What heights can be achieved. If someone makes a change, or encounters something beyond your ability, force you to change. These two types are called active change and passive change. It is difficult for most people to take the initiative to make changes, because they are used to staying in their comfort zone, not because they are forced to a dead end, and few people make changes. After all, people like a comfortable living environment and enjoyment.

You must have a good attitude when you do things. Attitude determines the height of a person. No matter how stupid or poor you are, as long as you are willing to work hard, having a good attitude will make you better and better. Even if we are at the bottom of society, as long as we have a good attitude, do things seriously, and work hard to do well. As long as you're willing to keep trying, It’s all going to get better. No matter what you do, attitude is very important. It's like when we go to work every day, some people feel that they will work hard if they are urged by the leader, and they will just muddle along for a day if they don't care about it. They always feel that they are doing things for the boss.  But how many people have thought about it, they can use work as a platform, they can change the boss, and the boss can change them, but they must always understand the truth that they can make themselves stronger and improve their ability on this platform. If you are willing to work hard and what you get is not just a salary, but more salary, higher position, and stronger ability. In the same way, you are unwilling to work hard. Wherever you go, you will take the lowest wage and do the hardest work.

The last one is ability. Ability must be based on the previous two points. If you do not have a correct understanding, you will have many detours and will always stay where you are. No matter how hard you work and how hard you make progress, you will not make great progress. You have high awareness, but without effort, without a right attitude there will be no progress. You can see that something is very profitable, but if you don't take action yourself, you will never make this money. You know that doing a job can improve your ability, but if you are unwilling to work hard, you will not improve.

The gap between others and you is getting bigger and bigger when you are off work. After you get off work, you go to play, hang out, lie down to play games, sleep, others work hard every day, study hard, and others get good grades. You always feel that others are lucky Okay, but you will never understand how much others have paid behind their backs and others use the time you squander to improve themselves. Time is the same for everyone, every day is 24 hours, but others spend their time on meaningful things, but you let your own time go to waste, this is what separates you from others.

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