Life's Creditors: We Owe Three People Throughout our lives

In our lifetime, we'll meet many people. Some whom we approach sincerely might disappoint us, while others may invest their whole hearts, but we remain indifferent. People long for their efforts to be respected and their sincerity reciprocated. Each encounter we experience essentially is predetermined.

Fate brings people together; without fate, even being close won't make you close, but with it, you can feel connected even if separated by thousands of miles.

If no debts existed, how would there be encounters? Indeed, meetings between individuals are predestined. In our future lives, these three types of relationships must be remembered and cherished because once lost, they cannot be regained.

The Greatest Act is the Unrewarded Act of Bringing Up

Firstly, we must remember our parents' act of bringing up. As the saying goes, "The grace of giving birth and raising you is greater than the sky." This grace is impossible to repay in one's lifetime. From our birth to growing up, our parents have been meticulous in their care for us, something we owe them for our entire lives.

There's a story that goes: An old man went to a cellphone repair shop to check what was wrong with his phone. The technician couldn't find any issue and told the old man his phone was fine. The old man, upon hearing this, burst into tears, "If the phone is fine, then why doesn't my child call me?" This story deeply touches my heart.

As we grow older, we often forget our parents. In the hustle and bustle of work, we tend to overlook them, sometimes not calling for a long time. Yet, our parents are always concerned about us. Even when you're away from home, they always keep their phones close, volume turned up high, afraid to miss your call. Despite understanding our busy lives, they choose to quietly wait. When the call finally arrives, they want to convey their longing for us but still inquire about our well-being, and that's enough for them.

Did you know? Their expression of happiness without reporting their worries is only surface-level. Once the call ends, they can't control their emotions, and tears flow because they miss us immensely.

"The term 'parents' refers to those who, looking at your back, are always filled with joy and sadness, wanting to embrace you but are afraid to show it."

As time passes and we grow wiser, the bond with our parents begins to fade. While they're still around, give them a call, visit home more often, and don’t wait until it's too late to feel remorseful about the missed opportunities.

Mutual Care, Love that Never Gives Up

Are you like me, not envy couples kissing on the streets but rather admire the elderly holding hands while strolling at dusk?

Many people believe that love is easy to come by but hard to sustain in the long run. However, I've always believed that a wonderful relationship nurtures an individual, making both people even better.

I have a friend who has been in a relationship with her boyfriend for ten years. When she decided to start her own business, she had to be in a long-distance relationship with her boyfriend. I asked her if she was worried about the stability of their relationship.

She said, "We've been together for so long, not only relying on each other but also supporting each other. He supports my decisions, and at the same time, I consider our future together. We cherish each other, and that's what makes our relationship enduring."

Indeed, only through cherishing can a relationship endure.

In relationships, companionship is the most enduring form of declaration of love. Parents may pass away first, children might have their own families, but the right person will accompany you through life's ups and downs and share the trivialities of daily life with you.

Love doesn't require grand gestures, but you must understand and cherish those who quietly accompany you, especially your significant other. In any relationship, there are mutual sacrifices. Moderate sacrifice is love, but excessive sacrifice can become dangerous.

Responses foster communication, and cherishing is what makes love last. Never assume that any contribution is taken for granted. In the long passage of time, cherish the one who has always been by your side.

The Helping Hand in times of trouble

There's a saying: "Life doesn't always go as planned, eight or nine times out of ten." Everyone goes through times of disappointment and destitution, but not everyone is fortunate enough to be helped by others.

Only time can verify a person's sincerity. Those who unhesitatingly support you in your most difficult moments, those who accompany you through your adversities, are the people most deserving of your gratitude and appreciation.

There's a story about a pair of good friends—an average-sized person and an overweight person. These friends had known each other for many years, always assisting each other, and passing through many difficult moments together.

One day, the overweight friend asked the average-sized one, "Why have you always wanted to be friends with me?" The average-sized friend replied, "In the past, others used to bully me because I was weak and thin. Only you were willing to protect me. Then, when I faced difficulties in my business, everyone else avoided me, but you were the only one willing to lend me money. Although you are a bit stingy, straightforward, and sometimes say hurtful things, I still feel that being friends with you is wonderful."

The most challenging people to encounter in life are those who help you in your times of trouble, who are willing to help you through tough times, and treat you sincerely. Because everyone is willing to share joy, but not everyone can have the friendship that offers help in difficult times.

Perhaps only through experiencing adversity can one truly see who is sincere and who is not. For those who genuinely treat you well, always hold a heart of gratitude. The way to repay is beyond measure; this kind of friendship is both rare and precious.

"In this world, when you meet someone who treats you sincerely remain a few." Therefore, those who ultimately remain by your side are the most precious. Only through cherishing will the path of life become brighter.

Even the most vigorous campfire, without added wood, will gradually die out. Similarly, even two deeply loving individuals, if they don't cherish each other, can become strangers.

When care diminishes, the relations become distant. As the relations become distant, emotions fade. Once the emotions fade, it's impossible to return to the past. May you learn to be grateful in your remaining years, thanking every person who has helped you.

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Life is Like Watching Drama

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Life is Like Watching Drama

"In our stages of growth, we long to see comedies, full of hope for a joyful life. As we step into our youth, we lean more toward tragedies to refine our fragile souls. Moving into middle age, we prefer to watch tragicomedies, seeking happiness from sadness and seeking pleasure in hardship. By the time we reach old age, we prefer to watch silent dramas, understanding the profound meaning of life in quiet silence."

This idea resonates deeply, as each stage of life has its own dramatic theme, with every act presenting a unique storyline.

Watching Comedies in Childhood

"Retain a childlike heart and nurture interests. A child's life is full of interests. They play, seek pleasure, wholeheartedly immerse themselves, and strive for joy."

Childhood is the opening chapter of our lives, the most carefree time when all children need to do is grow and embrace the promising future awaiting them.

I have a friend whose son has just entered middle school. Despite the increasing academic workload, his child is always optimistic and often wears a cheerful smile.

From a young age until now, his child has lived a remarkably happy life. Apart from the affectionate companionship of his parents, his grandparents also provide meticulous care.

The child particularly enjoys assembling LEGO toys. On Children's Day, Christmas, and his birthday, my friend gift him the LEGO sets he desires, allowing him to focus on assembling them.

He also has a fondness for reading, especially history books. My friend tries to buy suitable history books for him, expanding his knowledge.

Every weekend or holiday, his family goes out to explore, whether it's to a nearby park or as far as climbing the Great Wall in Beijing, continuously broadening his horizons.

Although occasionally faced with unpleasant incidents, the child quickly adjusts his emotions because he understands that his parents are his strongest support.

In the most wonderful stage of childhood, surrounded by a parent's love, a child growing up in such a warm environment is like a comedy filled with happiness, exuding an atmosphere of joy everywhere.

The stage of growth before eighteen is a vital part of every individual's life foundation. A child who grows up joyfully will have more confidence in the future.

The future belongs to every child, especially to those who remain optimistic and cheerful. Allowing a child to grow up in happiness is life's greatest blessing.

Watching Tragedies in Youth

Coming of age at eighteen signifies bearing more life responsibilities, which is the same for everyone. After experiencing various hardships, many young people may come to understand that the most crucial aspect of life is to temper one's inner strength through continuous trials. During the college entrance examination season, some kids tear up with excitement upon performing well, while those who don't fare as expected huddle in a corner, crying desolately. I came across a post from a netizen who said that he would never forget the moment years ago when the exam scores came out. He felt like there was no hope left in his life. His score was below the undergraduate admission threshold, which made him feel hopeless. He had to study in a college outside the province in a field he did not prefer. However, his determination allowed him to complete the three-year college program and eventually successfully transfer to a four-year program. Two years ago, he was admitted to graduate school back in his province. Reflecting on this experience, he expressed, "I thought my life was destined a certain way, but only after going through it did I realize that even in the most difficult moments, life still holds infinite possibilities as long as one doesn't give up." Approaching his graduation from graduate school, regardless of how easy or difficult it is to secure a job, he won't feel fearful because reality has made him much stronger. There's a saying, "If youth's years are wasted in vain, memories will be a tragic desolation." Nobody wishes their life to be a hopeless tragedy, but we may have to experience some disappointing events. Don't retreat or be pessimistic; every challenge in life actually contributes to the depth of our existence.

Watching Tragicomedies in Middle Age

The charm of middle age lies in understanding life and oneself, thus doing what one can and enjoying what life offers. Having experienced a myriad of life's joys and sorrows, those who have lived half a lifetime gradually come to understand themselves and life. Regardless of the immense sorrow or joy they feel, they can face them with more equanimity. In the halfway journey of life, we gradually learn to be indifferent since life involves both sorrow and joy. Middle age serves as the stage connecting youth and old age. Those who reach this stage may find themselves able to calmly face everything because that is part of the process of growth.

Watching Silent Plays in Old Age

As one enters old age, some individuals may no longer possess the fervour for struggle, only the gratitude for being fortunate to live through a day peacefully. However, this phase is not meant to be an idle remainder of life. Instead, it's an opportunity to draw experience from the past, comprehend the true essence of life, and ensure that the future years are more fulfilling and clear.

"Only through hardships can one gain a profound understanding of life, broadening the inner world; this is the key to happiness." Everyone wishes for a smooth life but can't avoid experiencing unfavourable situations and difficulties. Just as life experiences different storylines through its four stages, it includes both joy and sorrow, as well as commotion and tranquillity. Regardless of the stage one is in, what's crucial is living each stage marvellously, enabling a more insightful and freer way of living.

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Everyone Encounters Adversity

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Cracking the Code: Unraveling Human Character in Three Details

Since ancient times, human nature has been complex, and the human heart is enigmatic; we find it challenging to completely understand someone. As the saying goes, "Character is evident in behaviour, and the inner self is hidden within actions." To comprehend someone's essence, these three details are sufficient.

1. Attitude towards Parents Reflects One's Character

Parents provide life, nurture us into adulthood, and are the most unconditionally loving individuals in our lives. They are the closest people to us. We manifest our genuine selves in front of our parents without inhibitions, freely exhibiting our nature. However, the way one treats their parents often reflects their true character and conduct. Typically, we reserve our good temper for others while displaying our bad temper to family members. Psychologically, this is a common phenomenon. However, individuals who maintain a good and courteous demeanour in front of their closest relatives showcase exceptional cultivation and admirable qualities.

2.    Attitude Towards Profit Reflects One's Character

Facing profits reveals human nature. Money is a sign of human nature, and the pursuit of profit is the touchstone of character. When tested by profit, the good and bad sides of human hearts become apparent, and the warmth or coldness of human relationships becomes evident. Faced with the allure of profit, the cunning easily lose themselves and invite trouble, while those with noble character can maintain their integrity.

Consider a young man wanting to start a business. Lacking funds, he borrowed money from his brother, who unhesitatingly handed over all his savings. Yet, the business failed, and the young man disappeared without repaying the debt. Later, the brother fell seriously ill and urgently needed money. Upon seeking the young man's whereabouts to ask for help, the latter avoided discussing it and showed no concern for the brother's illness. He even evaded responsibility, saying, "It's the brother's duty to help the younger, so there's no need to repay." Eventually, the brother's friend stepped in and helped him through the tough times. From then on, their relationship was severed. Money can change a person's outward appearance. Faced with monetary interests, one can peer into a person's soul. Those who know contentment have a basic bottom line, while the selfish and greedy lack principles. In this journey of life, emotions and morality are paramount; money can be earned again, but after losing trust and morality, it's challenging to regain them. Some individuals, driven by personal gains, sacrifice morals and forget their conscience, harming those who trust and genuinely care for them. When around such people, it is essential to distance oneself early and avoid giving one's heartfelt trust, which will only lead to profound disappointment.

3.    Attitude Toward the Weak Reflects Manners

How one treats the weak signifies their compassion and manners. True strength involves treating others regardless of status, without trampling on the vulnerable to showcase oneself. It demonstrates a person's sense of respect and goodwill toward others.

People often admire the strong, but it is the respect and kindness shown to the weak that represents the most valuable qualities. When people mutually respect one another, they can progress together, whereas mutual disdain causes mutual dislike. Truly cultivated individuals do not boast about their status but understand the perspective of the weak, treating others with humility and kindness. Not looking down on others due to one's own nobility is a benevolent attitude, as well as a wise and far-sighted view. Such an approach to life is exceedingly precious, and individuals like this will undoubtedly earn long-term trust and respect. A person's character can be glimpsed through their behavior and manner of speech.

In summary, a person's character can be observed by their actions:

• Their gratitude and patient companionship towards their parents.
• Their stance regarding profits, their adherence to ethics, and trustworthiness.
• Their treatment of the weak: are they modest, stable, and respectful?

Exemplary character is a person's greatest support, the most solid confidence, and the best passport for traversing the world.

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The Best State of Life: Half and Half

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What is a Mother?

Tomorrow is Mother's Day. Do you know what a mother is? Some describe her as: She’s the voice that nags when you're cold and need to put on more clothes; She’s the embrace that consoles you when you come home; She’s the one who fills the table with steaming, lavish meals; She’s the one packing your things before you go out; She’s the lifelong refuge that brings peace to your heart.

As time passes, mothers give us quiet companionship and the warmest memories. They dedicate their entire lives, yet seldom seek anything in return.

A mother is someone who hides love in every response.

There's a saying that goes, "The happiest thing in the world is shouting 'mom' and getting a response." This understanding is profound. From childhood to adulthood, each time you come home, as soon as you enter, you call out "mom." Upon hearing her response, you rush into the kitchen to see what deliciousness she’s preparing. If you don’t hear her reply, you search around for her figure. If you can't find her, you ask, "Dad, where’s Mom?" But in most cases, you’ll hear that "Ah" which gives us a response.

The word "mom" seem to hold a magical power. When having a nightmare, calling out "mom" makes you quickly wake up and sleep again after turning over. In times of sorrow, calling out "mom" feels like all the pain finds solace. When facing difficulties, calling out "mom" feels like all problems will be solved. When returning home for a holiday, calling out "mom" makes that heart that’s been wandering suddenly settle down.

Where there's a home, there's warmth; where there's a mother, there's peace.

I saw a video where four generations, from children to elderly, appeared successively in the name "mom." They all wore smiles, but surprisingly, it was deeply moving.

Someone previously mentioned: In the past, I always felt my mother nagged a lot, overseeing everything, needing her permission to eat, do certain things, or wear certain clothes, and more. Later, my mother passed away due to illness. The home no longer had her nagging voice, and there were no more texts from her reminding me to wear warmer clothes when it’s cold. The originally warm home suddenly turned cold. On a business trip to another province one day, with a sudden drop in temperature, looking at the inappropriate clothing in my suitcase, I suddenly felt sad, tears streaming down my face. I deeply missed my mother's nagging, wanting time to reverse and go back to the time when I had her.

Where there’s a mother, there's concern; there's someone who loves you wholeheartedly, thinks for you comprehensively, and worries whether you’re thirsty, hungry, tired, or cold.

Every Response and Every Nag from Mom Holds Profound Love for You

Every response and every nag from Mom contains a deep love for you. This is an indispensable warmth in everyone's growth, contributing to a fulfilled and happy life. They wear a smile, unexpectedly touching.

Someone previously commented: In the past, I always thought my mother nagged a lot, overseeing everything, needing her permission to eat at certain times, do specific things, or wear particular clothes, and so on. Later, when Mom passed away due to illness, there was no more sound of her nagging in the house, and there were no more messages on Whatsapp reminding me to wear warm clothes when it’s cold. The previously warm home suddenly turned icy cold. On a certain day, during a business trip to another province, the temperature dropped suddenly. Looking at the inappropriate clothes in the suitcase, I suddenly felt sad, tears streaming down my face. I sorely miss Mom’s nagging, wishing time could turn back to the days when I had her.

Every response and every nag from Mom holds profound love for you. This is essential warmth for everyone's growth and leads to a fulfilling and happy life.

Mother, the Only Person You Dare to Offend in This World

There's a story once told: A man displayed magnanimity and affability at work, neither obsequious to his superiors nor unfriendly to his subordinates. However, in his family life, his temper often erupted due to frequent quarrels with his wife over trivial matters. One day, his mother unintentionally noticed these two entirely different behaviours he displayed at work and at home. She questioned him, "You’re one person outside and another at home?" The man couldn't hold back and complained to his mother, "Mom, I'm just too tired..." His mother, speaking with heartfelt emphasis, told him, "Who isn't tired from living? But you can't let that control your temper! You should remember that offending your boss might cost you just a job; offending a client might mean losing just an order; but offending your wife could mean losing a home and a lifetime of happiness. Yet, there's one person you can offend, and that’s me. If you're upset, tired, don't raise your voice at your wife, call Mom. Mom will listen, Mom wants to listen."

This story leaves a profound impression. We encounter many people in our lives, family, friends, colleagues, classmates, partners, but no one will forgive you repeatedly like your mother. Even if you shout at her, afterward, if you apologize and acknowledge your mistake, she'll forgive you time and time again. Your mother might be the only person you dare to offend because you know she will always stand behind you, accepting everything about you. However, life's biggest failure is leaving your best smiles for others and displaying annoyance to your mother. In places she can't see, she may feel sorrow and tears due to your repeated criticisms. Only because she loves you, she deeply conceals her own scars. Nevertheless, life is brief, time is fleeting, and a mother's time with us is limited. If, in the future, your memories of your mother are filled with angry shouts from you, regret for not cherishing her, and memories of her carefulness, it will leave you with endless regret. Therefore, if your mother is still around, please give her more happiness, bring more smiles to her.

Mother, the Person Most Worthy of Your Gratitude in the World

Mothers are praised as follows: She is the vast sea, tolerating our clumsiness and stubbornness with infinite patience; she is the gentle breeze, quietly comforting our despair and defeat; she is the radiant light, concentrating on our bloom on life’s stage. Only after becoming parents do we comprehend that no matter how eloquent the words, they cannot fully express a mother’s sacrifices for us. Mothers give us life and accompany us as we slowly grow up. Calling out "mom," she unreservedly takes on all responsibilities, endures all hardships, and nurtures us to adulthood. And all we can give her is endless gratitude. A story that touched many: On a rainy day, someone found a pair of stray cats. The mother cat was no longer there, yet the kitten still thought Mom was just asleep, continually licking the body that had lost warmth. It stayed by the mother during the day, only going out to find food at night. When hungry, it drank rainwater from the street; when starved, it gnawed on twigs. It found a piece of meat in the trash, but despite its hunger, it didn't eat it. Instead, it flew back to its mother, placed the meat near her, and kept licking, as if trying to wake her up. The veterinarian discovered small stones stuffed in the kitten’s stomach. It couldn't bear to eat the good food, leaving it for Mom, feeding on twigs and stones. Animals are affectionate, but what about humans? Every mother is an extraordinary figure among the ordinary. She turns love into every fleeting moment of life. This love might seem trivial, taken for granted, and we might assume it will last forever. Yet, we fail to realize that someday, this love will vanish in an unexpected way. Time cannot be halted, life, however, comes to an end. In our limited time, we must do our best to give our mothers the best latter half of life. In "Reply 1988," there's a dialogue that often strikes the heart: "They say God is everywhere, and that's why he created mothers. When a mother reaches her mother's age, her mother is still her guardian. The title 'mother' strikes a chord." With Mother's Day approaching, may all mothers be healthy and happy, eternally happy.

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What is a Mother?

This Life, Rely on Yourself

There's a saying: "Relying on mountains will make them collapse, relying on people will make you old. In the end, you realize you only relied on yourself." Throughout life, it’s only by depending on oneself that one can live with dignity and shine brightly.

This Life, Don't Rely on Parents

Life is not all smooth sailing. Only by relying on oneself can one change their fate. There's a deeply moving story from the late 1980s. A man with hearing impairments married a woman who was not eloquent and slightly clumsy. The entire village watched, curious to see what kind of child they would have.

This couple had a daughter who grew up to be the prettiest girl in the village. She was called Jane. Since childhood, she frequently heard people say, "Such a smart and beautiful child but with parents like that, she is so pitiable." However, Jane was always stubborn; she didn't believe she was the "pitiable" person the village spoke of.

After graduating from elementary school, she chose to drop out and joined the village's performance troupe as an apprentice. She put her heart and soul into her work, believing that only by relying on herself and acquiring enough skills could she change her fate. She didn't just learn to sing and play instruments; she also read many books in her spare time.

Four to five years passed, and she became a highly respected figure in the troupe. Her outstanding appearance and profound knowledge made her performances widely popular. Gradually, more people started inviting her to perform.

Some say, "Life is like walking on thin ice; just as you catch a breath, a new challenge arises." Just as Jane’s life was gradually improving, her mother was diagnosed with colon cancer. Frequent hospital stays and chemotherapy quickly depleted their resources.

To earn more money, Jane worked even harder. However, the sudden arrival of the 2020 pandemic completely disrupted her livelihood, leading her to lose her income entirely.

Her mother's illness worried her deeply, and the lack of financial resources made her even more anxious. There's a saying: "If you are heading for debauchery, not even a deity can save you; if you are growing, even a dire situation can bring a new beginning."

Facing the inability to perform live shows, she decided to live stream singing online. Friends suggested she glam up to attract more male fans, but Jane firmly believed that the most touching aspect is humanity. She was in a modest rural setting, a simple and beautiful girl, with ordinary parents but a curious innocence in their eyes. This stark contrast drew over 20,000 fans on her first night of streaming. These fans were mostly dreamers living far from their hometowns.

Through her live streaming, these fans felt familiar scenes and moving songs, soothing their homesickness. Jane rediscovered her life's value and earned a considerable income through live streaming, improving her family's financial situation.

Now, when the villagers see her parents, they say, "You're blessed to have such an accomplished daughter." When this happens, her parents point to the picture of their daughter on the phone screen and give a thumbs-up.

"Destiny ultimately cannot defeat us. When you're feeling low, just look around, and see what it can stir up. Over time, you'll realize that it's ultimately like a child, or rather, it is a child, our own child. Our destiny is shaped by our own hands. In the end, we are the creators of our own destiny."

Perhaps in childhood, you can rely on parents, but as time passes, life changes unpredictably. Parents cannot always be with us, nor can they always shield us from life's challenges. Some say, "Having parental support is a straight road, lacking it is a winding road."

On this winding road, only those who endure it alone will realize that life is about constantly refining, repairing, and shaping oneself, meeting a brand new and better version every time.

This Life, Don't Rely on Marriage

My close friend got married right after graduating from college and soon became pregnant. At that time, her husband's business was doing well, so she chose to resign and become a full-time housewife. People often say that being a homemaker is one of the most perilous occupations, and she fell victim to it.

One of the things that distressed my friend most during her time as a full-time homemaker was the frequent words from her husband: "You want money again?" He couldn't understand her efforts and only complained that she didn't do anything but spent too much money. She felt extremely oppressed in this passive role.

Therefore, my friend decided to do something to break free from this situation. At the time, the trend of purchasing agents was rising, and she began a purchasing business in partnership with a male classmate. However, this almost destroyed her marriage. Her husband suspected her of having an inappropriate relationship with her classmate and physically abused her because of it. Frustrated, my friend went back to her parents' home.

Upon her friend's referral, she became a substitute teacher in a school. Concerned about her teaching abilities, she diligently prepared and refined her teaching materials. She rehearsed in front of experienced teachers until she felt adequately prepared to start teaching. She prepared for every class with such meticulousness.

Midway through the semester, her class unexpectedly achieved the first position in the entire grade, surprising everyone, including herself.

During that time, she deeply realized that hard work doesn’t go in vain. Her effort gave her confidence and direction in life. Following this, she moved to work for a training institution, and many students who had attended her classes before eagerly signed up for her courses. Her husband, seeing her transformation, was equally shocked and started regretting his past reckless behaviour. He hoped she would forgive him and resume being a homemaker. However, my friend's stance was resolute: she could return home, but her career would not be abandoned. Her effort gave her a sense of accomplishment and happiness.

Gradually, her reputation grew, allowing her to break away from her previous institution and establish her own training centre. Even with increasing students and hiring more teachers, she personally took on the teaching responsibilities. Not only did she no longer ask her husband for money, but she also covered the household expenses during her husband's business downturns.

"The road has to be walked step by step; suffering has to be endured mouthful by mouthful. Pulling sinew and skin is the only way to transform and grow, besides this, there are no shortcuts." Marriage has never been a sanctuary for anyone, and sometimes, it's the beginning of nightmares for some. A person must rely on themselves. Instead of seeking warmth from another's shoulder, it's better to soar against the wind and be self-reliant. Only one's bank balance and individual abilities are the greatest assurance in navigating the world. As long as we have our protective umbrella, regardless of stormy or sunny times, we can move forward courageously.

In This Life, Don't Rely on Children

It's best not to expect too much from others because everyone has their own difficulties. Let me tell you about my neighbour, Aunt Gong's experience.

Aunt Gong has an only son who lives abroad. Eight years ago, her husband passed away due to a stroke, leaving her living alone. Her son, feeling pity for his mother, brought Aunt Gong over to live with him abroad.

However, things took an unexpected turn. Aunt Gong and her daughter-in-law didn't get along. In less than two months of living abroad, they had several arguments. Seeing the dilemma her son was in, Aunt Gong firmly chose to return home alone.

Upon her return, Aunt Gong's hair turned almost completely white. Initially, she didn't pay much attention to it. But every time someone saw her, they'd ask in astonishment, "What happened? Why did your hair turn white?" Each time she heard such questions, it caused her heartache and tears.

Hence, she decided to visit a hair salon and dye her hair black. People who saw her afterwards commented, "Wow! You look so much younger." Aunt Gong smiled and said, "My old partner left, but I am still alive. Since I'm alive, I should live well."

Looking in the mirror, she found she indeed didn't look as old, and she felt much better emotionally. Aunt Gong said, "When you're old, you can't rely on your son; he has his own family, and I must rely on myself."

After changing her mindset, Aunt Gong started exercising in the mornings, rested after lunch, played cards or danced with the old ladies in the neighborhood in the afternoons. When her health allowed, Aunt Gong frequently traveled and even found a new partner, beginning a late-life romance. She moved into her new partner's house and rented out her own.

She said, "Raising children may not prevent aging; instead of relying on children, it's better to rely on oneself."

As one grows older, they need three things: a healthy mindset, a robust body, and sufficient savings. Only with these can one avoid what the ancients said: "Life is short, and in the blink of an eye, old age arrives." In old age, facing many troubles, one can only slowly swallow them on their own.

"Others are not obligated to help you." When you fall, there may not always be someone to help you up; when you're short of money, there might not be someone to give you charity; when you feel aggrieved, there might not be someone to care. In times when no one assists, one must stand on their own; in times of poverty, one can only rely on their efforts; when there's no help, one must solve problems on their own. Self-reliance surpasses dependence on others; it's better to rely on oneself.

Between people, it's impossible to fully comprehend each other's sorrows and joys or truly experience the other's feelings. Even if others are good, in the end, you still need to rely on yourself to find true happiness. When facing the brutality of society, financial pressures, life's setbacks, the shattering of love, and the complexities of human nature, you gradually understand: you must be your own shelter, no longer needing to evade storms.

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Embracing the Essence of Human Nature

Most of the troubles in our lives actually originate from interpersonal relationships. Sometimes, a few words can make people feel warm, but sometimes a single expression can strike fear in them. There's a saying: "The human heart is unfathomable, human nature is ever-changing."

We absolutely should not overly trust specific individuals.

Not Many People Sincerely Want You to Succeed

Both kindness and darkness coexist in people; they often can't stand others doing better than themselves. People around you becoming successful is often more easily envied than those achieving distant glory. A proverb goes: "Aside from parents and a few close friends, there are very few people who genuinely feel happy because of your success. More people ask about your affairs just to confirm you're doing worse than them." Though brutal, this is a facet of human nature.

So, when you find yourself in trouble, do not expect support from others. There are many people to accompany you in joy, but very few willing to share your hardships. When you succeed, refrain from boasting to those around you. There are very few who genuinely rejoice in your success, while those who are envious are many.

Your life is your own, and it doesn't concern others. Experience pain, relish happiness without revealing the intricacies of life to others. Learn to be modest, composed, control your edges, and even in ordinary days, you'll shine.

Others Only See the Results; You Have to Go Through the Process Alone

Some say, "Every person has a fire in their heart, but those passing by only see the smoke." This phrase is deeply resonant. In the adult world, someone understanding you is fortunate, but relying on your own strength is the greatest support.

You hope others understand your struggles, but who isn't going through their own difficulties? You expect someone to traverse hardships with you, but who isn't carrying their own burdens?

Do not blame others for not understanding your plight, nor complain about the cruelty of reality or the indifference of human feelings. Because life is like this; others only see the outcome, while you face the process alone.

So, when you encounter a low point, don't disturb anyone, and never get upset because of being ignored. Don't feel disheartened due to being cold-shouldered; quietly work hard and put in the effort.

The less care you receive from others, the more self-respect and self-love you should exhibit. The more you lack companions, the more courageously you must move forward. Learning to grow within yourself is the way to flourish outwardly. Don't struggle with present emotions because your goal is to stand out based on your abilities one day.

Allow Yourself to Be You, Allow Others to Be Themselves

There's a popular question online: "How to deal with being around certain people whom you don't like but have to be with every day?"

A highly praised answer is: "Allow yourself to be yourself, while also allowing others to be themselves."

Interpersonal relationships are an unavoidable issue, and if you cannot accept it internally, it will bring suffering. Just as you need to allow that some people may not like you, you must also permit the existence of people around you whom you don't like. You must allow your thoughts to not be accepted and also permit others to adhere to their views. Don't force others to change, and don't compel yourself to assimilate.

In the world of adults, there is only filtering, not teaching; there's only choice, not change. Endurance will harm you, blaming will hurt the other person, only allowing will set you free. Ignore those you dislike, cherish those you like. Stick to what you love, allow what you don't, respect what you don't understand, and do what you should do. Don't harbor resentment, don't let things affect your inner self. Respect differences, self-reflect, and find inner joy.

Offer a Helping Hand, but Don't Strain to Assist

"People should do some voluntary work, but there's no need to go to excessive lengths to help others."

If it's within your capabilities, lend a hand, but if it goes beyond your abilities, you shouldn’t strain yourself.

If you put in a lot of effort to complete a task, and others consider it to be simple, not only showing no gratitude but also expecting more help from you; if you agree to help but can't manage, it not only disrupts the matter but also affects relationships, making you feel aggrieved and causing a negative impression.

So, when facing requests from others, don't take on things beyond your capability. Doing your best is an attitude, and acting according to your capacity is a wise decision.

Help to the best of your abilities when you can, and learn to refuse when it's beyond your capacity.

Don't overly worry about damaging relationships by declining; true friends will understand your predicament and won't make you uncomfortable.

Never Judge Others Casually

"Everything we hear is an opinion, not a fact; everything we see is a perspective, not the truth."

Never stand in your own position and casually judge others. This is the most basic form of respect between mature individuals.

If you haven’t lived through someone else's life, do not rush to express your opinion, as your comments will likely be one-sided. If you haven’t deeply understood someone else's life, don’t draw hasty conclusions, as your judgment could be incorrect.

There's a saying: "Kind words are like the warmth of winter; harsh words are like the chill of June."

Do not let the stinging words from your mouth become a blade that hurts others and ultimately harms yourself.

Understand that there are no secrets to be spoken; speaking cautiously is the wisest choice. The wiser someone is, the more they focus on themselves, while those restless and superficial individuals love to gossip about others.

Silently reflecting on one's own mistakes, refraining from easily judging others, doing things with a sincere heart, and being cautious with words is the way to live.

Don't Always Seek to Triumph in Words

"There are two kinds of people in the world: those who want to win, and those who want to win an argument."

When a person insists too much on winning verbally, it not only creates an impression of arrogance but may also appear undesirable due to emotional outbursts.

Never directly oppose others' views. Life is not an arena, and one shouldn't always seek to defeat others in verbal debates.

Understand that language is a tool for conveying emotions and solving problems, not a weapon for victory.

Many times, we seem to have the upper hand but actually suffer considerable losses. Arguing with loved ones, winning the argument but losing the relationship; arguing with unimportant individuals, winning vanity but losing dignity.

"Always aiming to win in words is the basest behaviour."

If you're right, there's no need for arguing; if you're wrong, there's no point in debating.

Learn to maintain the dignity of yourself and others in communication, provide a sense of superiority to others—this is the wisdom of dealing with people.

I strongly agree with the phrase: "The most valuable thing is not that we are all the same, but knowing that 'we are different' and still being able to respect and understand each other, communicate while maintaining our independence, without conforming, degrading, flattering, or crossing boundaries."

Interpersonal communication is like practicing, it requires wisdom. Learning to be sincere and setting boundaries, being close but not excessively so, being cautious and proper in handling affairs, and maintaining an appropriate distance in relationships are among the most important elements of sustaining all relationships.

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Should you work for your relative?

Should you work for your relative?

Why do you often hear people say that no matter how poor you are, you should not go to work with relatives?

The most fundamental reason is that he thinks he is helping you, and you think you are helping him.

I heard this story from my friend. He graduated from university when he was 24, and there was once his uncle went to pay a visit to his house. He noted that my friend was graduating soon so he wanted my friend to be responsible for marketing role in his company.

The situation at that time was that, based on his academic qualifications and abilities, he should be able to find salary of 3k a month. Finding a job will not be difficult at all, but since his uncle initiated it, with a monthly salary of two thousand five thousand. He decided to accept the job.

He also believed that his uncle would not treat him badly, so he agreed and went to work in this uncle's company. His salary remained stagnant during his tenure of 1.5 Years with no bonuses. He decided to talk to his uncle about increment of his salary based on his demonstrated ability and performance. However, the talk did not go well and our relationship became sour.

His uncle was not willing to give him any bonus, only willing to raise his salary to 4k. His uncle said that he provided a very good platform for him to learn since he was a fresh graduate at that time. You see, his uncle thought he helped my friend, and my friend thought he was helping his uncle, so there is really no need to work for relatives. There are vast opportunities out in the market.

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30 years old: three problems you have to face

30 years old: three problems you have to face 

The first question is the question of family and responsibilities. Don't think that you are still young. Don't think that some problems are still much distanced from you. There are some problems, whether you are willing to face them or not, you must take on the responsibilities that match your age. Most people, at this age, have to think about family issues. If you have already married and established a business, you must be soberly aware: How should your career develop in order to ensure that you can support the burden of your entire family? This includes not only your lover, but also your children and parents.

At this stage, your pressure has increased exponentially, but if your growth in the workplace cannot be doubled, or even going backwards in some form, Then, your future career development will face more pressure. And this kind of pressure, more often, will make you have no spare energy to seek better development. Many people often have a big worry when they change jobs: if I quit, my income is not as high as it is now, will I easily move again in my current job? To put it more politely: Do I dare to move again easily? Do I still have the guts and courage? So, if you want to take action, try your best to move forward as soon as possible before you have the burden of family.

 

The second problem is the matching degree of ability and age. Why do many companies clearly stipulate similar work experience requirements such as 5 years of experience, 10 years of experience, etc. when recruiting talents? Because working time means the level of ability that matches it. For the same job, the abilities accumulated by 5 years of experience and 10 years of experience are not the same, and the responsibilities that can be undertaken are also different. The longer your working years, the stronger your ability.

One of the more difficult situations is the mismatch of ability and age. Many people who have worked for 3 or 5 years, or even those who have worked for a year, are not much different in terms of ability, so when their careers want to make a breakthrough, they will encounter a lot of resistance. There are two reasons for this situation: one is frequent job-hopping, there is no accumulation of experience; the other is that although accumulating experience, only the first year is growth, and the remaining few years They are all doing repetitive work and no growth. Therefore, for those 30-year-old friends, from now on, you must carefully examine a question: from graduation to now, how many years have you worked? Do the abilities you have match your age? If it does not match, then you must establish a sense of crisis as soon as possible and run forward to fill the gap.

 

The third problem is the organisation and structure knowledge. As one progresses in the corporate ladder, one cannot be stuck only having knowledge at operational level but also how the management level thinks and solve issues. In the workplace, people at different job levels do different things, and their vision and thinking patterns are also different. A most basic salesman thinks about how to maintain his sales quota. This is a tactical thing and his responsibility; but if a marketing director is in the role, he still thinks like a salesman. , that is his negligence. The operation of every enterprise is composed of strategy and tactics. Big strategies will be subdivided into small strategies, and small strategies will be subdivided into execution tactics one by one, which will be implemented by grassroots personnel. People at different levels are responsible for work at different heights and perform their duties. This is also the meaning of teamwork. Similarly, people at different levels have different knowledge structures. The higher the level, the higher your perspective and thinking on the problem, and the higher the level of your overall knowledge structure.

 

In addition, from the perspective of communication, the higher your position, the closer you are to the boss, and the more opportunities you have to contact the top leaders of the company. If your level of thinking is inconsistent with the bosses, then your ability cannot be recognized. In this situation, your chances of getting promoted are slim, and your career will stop there.

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One’s greatest upbringing is to forgive parents’ imperfections

01

I once saw a post: "Why do one always lose control of their temper and want to blame their parents when they make a naive mistake?" The answer that impressed me the most was: We are angry with our parents, but not angry they did something wrong, but angry that they shouldn't be the wrongdoer.

They used to tell you not to talk to strangers, but now they can blabber our family issues to random people who sell unknown health products on the street; they used to tell you not to anyhow spend money, but now they will just buy things we do not need but they are on discounts in the shopping centre; they used to tell you things you should do, but now they always break their promises.

The reason why you are unhappy is actually because you have discovered their imperfections, but you are still reluctant to admit and understand them.

02

Two or three years ago, my mother suddenly became fascinated with cheongsam. Every time she went shopping, she had to carry one or two pieces back. The colors of each cheongsam are mainly of red, green and purple. It was very ‘flashy’. Every time she puts on a new cheongsam, she had to stand in front of me and asked if she look good. My answer will very negative every time: "It's not good-looking."

I found my mother packing her cheongsam and preparing to give it to others one morning. I asked her what was wrong, she sighed and said disheartenedly: "I'm old and can't wear it anymore."

At that moment, I understood why she always asked me if she looked good. The affirmation of us as her children means that she is still young. But I understood it too late and had hurt her too many times inadvertently.

I have come across this short story: "I don’t remember loving my parents. When I was young, I was afraid of them, and when I was older, I began to bother them. When I grow even older, we will argue when we met, and since don’t know when, I began to look down on them. Although I know that I need to be responsible for them but I just cannot bring myself to do that.”

The stupidest way to show care and concern is to show your parents a nasty face and tell them: "You are wrong, you are so stupid", and you think you are doing them well.

03

There is a saying that goes: "When parents are getting older, it is always difficult to change their mindset. it is necessary to ask children to forgive their parents instead."

Let them ask questions that they can’t understand; let them make some naive mistakes; let them express some outdated opinions; let them do things they like, even though you may not agree with those things. Don't rush to preach to your parents. 

In many cases, filial piety is not to do what we think is good, but to make them feel good.

We always think that our parents are not perfect, but we don't know that they have silently paid a lot behind our backs in order to make you recognize them. As we grow up, we should gradually accept the fact that our parents are just ordinary people, and should gradually understand their difficulties.

When your parents are old, please remember to love them as they did when they loved you. Don't do things that will make you regret it, and don't wait until they are gone to leave regrets.

The greatest upbringing of a person is to forgive the imperfections of his parents. May I wish all the parents live a long and healthy life! We won't be here without them !

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There is a kind of happiness, that is to go home and eat

There is a kind of happiness, that is to go home and eat

It is the first day of the year. I will take this time to talk about the importance of family warmth.

There is this female colleague in my company; she will go home for dinner most of the time. When we order takeaways or settle our meals in the company, she will ride her beloved motorbike and goes home for dinner happily.

At first, we thought she disliked takeaway or company food. Later, I learned from her that she is the only daughter brought up by her mother painstakingly. Now her mother is retired at home. If she doesn't go home to eat, her mother will eat casually. Only when she comes home, her mother will bother to cook more proper and nutritious food.

Her home is not far from the company, and it takes about 20 minutes to her house. Whenever, she goes home for her dinner, colleagues in our department will watch her go home with envy.

In fact, what we envy is, not only the happiness of her being able to go home and eating delicious meals, but also the little fortune of her being with her family every day.

If one can accompany their parents to a meal everyday, I think they are very fortunate. I remembered playing  till wee hours with my friends when I was young, and when it was too late, my mother would call me home for dinner.

"Mom calls you to go home for dinner." Then I will reluctantly bid farewell to my friends.

When I first started working, I turned into a complete workaholic. If there is nothing important, I will never go home easily. I will not let go of work just because of the "trivial thing" of going home for dinner.

As long as I go home to eat, my parents will be happier than anyone else.

They went to the market early to prepare the ingredients, solemnly prepared a table of dishes, and then waited for me to go home. When I get to the door of my house, I will feel safe and secure when I smell the fragrance of familiar food.

The dishes prepared by my parents are not delicacies, but they are delicious, sweet and sour pork tenderloin, tomato scrambled eggs, fish-flavored pork, braised prawns, spicy lotus root slices...Infused with love, these dishes have become works of art that I need to appreciate in my whole life.

My parents taught me a lot of things. But what they often say is this sentence:

Where can I eat the best food? Of course at home!

After I grew up, I realized that being able to go home for dinner is a kind of happiness. This kind of happiness can support you through countless difficult times.

If you have time, please go home more for dinner. Just a simple, plain meal can calm you down and gain joy and happiness. A gluttonous feast is no better than home-cooked dishes. Live your life well, no matter how far you go, no matter how high you fly, please remember to go home for dinner.

Home is always the best harbour for a person. The delicious food at home is a cure for everything. The family sits around the dinner table, sharing food while chatting, enjoying themselves, what is there to be unsatisfied in life?

Cheers Everyone and have a great year ahead.=)

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Just work hard, time can tell

01

Many people may have had this question before. Two people started at the same time and as time went by, the result was very different. Why does this happen? Some people say that it is because people use time differently. Some people are willing to spend time dwelling in a certain field, while others are wasting their time. The result that time gives us is the most accurate.

The kind of life you live depends on how you spend your time.

I once met a young mother. After years of study, she got a bachelor degree and obtained several vocational qualification certificates. She joined a MNC later. The other mothers in the community were both envious and puzzled, "Where did she have so much time to study?" She was racing against time to read, working hard while bringing the baby up.

So you see, time never favors anyone. Everyone has 24 hours a day. But what widens the gap between people is the attitude towards time.

If you waste time, time will ignore you; if you value time, time will treat you well. You treasure time and became a better version of yourself. This is the best result that time can give you.

02

In fact, no matter which industry you are in, attitude and ability are very important. There are no shortcuts behind "excellent". Only through time can we obtain glorious results.

Time is fair. When you consume time, time silently abandons you. Every step you take and every second you waste will be very obvious.

03

Time is the fairest thing in the world, and it is also something that can't be returned. Time is also a kind of power. How you spend time, you will get what you get.

For example, if you want to learn a new language, you will spend time practicing it frequently. The more you practice, the better you will be. When you can talk to others in a foreign language, you will have a strong sense of accomplishment. This kind of positive feedback will increase your self-confidence. People will become more confident and will be more active in doing other things. This is a chain reaction.

Time has such a magical power.

So, just work hard, time can tell.

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Ten years later, will you thank yourself today?

Listen: Podcast