“When the kids are in college, I’ll finally take that trip with my girlfriends.”
That was a comment from a woman online — a mother of a high school senior, who, like many others, had dreams in her youth but put them on hold after marriage to care for her family.
When someone encouraged her to just go now, she responded, “My son is preparing for exams, and my husband is working towards a promotion. They need me right now.”
Sounds reasonable. But let’s be honest — even when her son goes off to college, she likely won’t take that trip. Because then it’ll be: “After he graduates… after he gets married… after I help raise my grandchildren…”
She’s not alone. Many people live what can only be described as a “temporary life.”
They treat the present as a waiting room for a better future — one they believe will eventually arrive. But the truth? That future rarely comes the way they imagine.
The Trap of the “Temporary Life”
We convince ourselves we’re just “getting by for now.” That someday, when things settle down, we’ll live the life we really want. But one day turns into another, and before we know it, we’ve spent years living a life on hold.
There’s no “temporary mode” in life. Time doesn’t pause just because we tell ourselves it’s not the right time yet.
People who live with clarity and purpose don’t wait. They make the most of each moment — not because life is perfect, but because they’ve chosen to stop postponing it.
My Own Temporary Life (and How It Drained Me)
I used to be a classic case myself.
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I’d grab wrinkled clothes from the bed in the morning and think, “It’s just work, who cares?”
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I’d half-heartedly complete tasks at my internship, telling myself, “I’ll try harder once I’m full-time.”
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I’d pass by flower shops longing to buy a bouquet, but stop myself: “This apartment is too old — I’ll buy flowers when I move into a better place.”
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I worked long hours and dreamed of buying a comfortable chair — but again, “Once I buy a house, I’ll get the nice furniture.”
I kept postponing pleasure, beauty, and comfort for a future version of my life that never arrived.
The result? I was burned out, uninspired, and physically hurting from years of poor posture at work. I wasn’t just tired — I was soul-weary.
I was living in a loop of “I’m not good enough → I don’t deserve better → I won’t ask for more.”
Psychologists call this the “unworthiness trap.” The more we believe we don’t deserve more, the more we settle — for less joy, less growth, less life.
You Deserve More — But You Have to Choose It
As Dale Carnegie once said:
“If you’re not happy with your life, change it.”
Don’t wait for the perfect time. Don’t wait to deserve it more. Don’t wait until you’re 100% ready.
Here’s how to start:
1. Bring Ritual and Beauty Into Daily Life
According to the theory of embodied cognition, the objects we interact with influence our mindset.
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Use your favorite mug for morning coffee.
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Wear that nice outfit, even if it’s “just” for a casual day.
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Make your space feel special with low-cost touches — like warm lighting, personal photos, or fresh flowers.
Even a well-prepared breakfast can lift your mood. That’s not frivolous — it’s self-respect.
2. Turn Transitional Phases into Growth Periods
Waiting for life to “start” after a job change, a breakup, or a move? Use this in-between time to rewire your habits.
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Learn a new skill, pick up a hobby, or pursue a side hustle.
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Try new routines: early mornings, workouts, journaling.
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Explore creative outlets: writing, photography, cooking.
When life slows down, don’t zone out — zoom in.
3. Replace “Waiting” with Actionable Goals
Stop saying: “When I have more time/money/confidence…”
Instead, set micro-goals using reverse planning.
Want to change jobs?
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Week 1: Update your resume
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Week 2: Connect with 3 professionals in your field
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Week 3: Send 5 targeted applications
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Week 4: Practice mock interviews
Waiting is passive. Planning is powerful.
A Real-Life Example: The Elegant Chef
In a small town, a private restaurant went viral. Why?
Not just the delicious food — but the owner’s grace.
Despite running a busy kitchen 365 days a year, she always dressed beautifully, wore jewelry, and carefully arranged fresh flowers in every corner of her restaurant.
When asked why she went to the trouble, she replied simply:
“Why should I let my profession dictate my joy? I live for myself, too.”
She didn’t wait for luxury — she created it, every single day.
What Happens If You Don’t Stop Waiting?
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You drain your energy in low-vibration routines
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You lose the sense of agency in your own life
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You miss opportunities that may never come back
Like the man who passed on a promotion because he didn’t think he was ready — only to watch a colleague take it, and rise to become his boss. He regrets waiting to this day.
Don’t Wait for “Someday” — That Day Is Today
Your life doesn’t need a “perfect” moment to begin.
Every small choice you make now — to treat yourself with care, to pursue something meaningful, to create joy in the mundane — adds up to a beautiful, empowered life.
“Life is too short — if you give up today, tomorrow may never come.”
So buy the flowers. Cook that nice meal. Go for the walk. Start the project.
Live with intention — not hesitation.
Let your future self look back in awe, not regret.
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