This Life, Rely on Yourself

There's a saying: "Relying on mountains will make them collapse, relying on people will make you old. In the end, you realize you only relied on yourself." Throughout life, it’s only by depending on oneself that one can live with dignity and shine brightly.

This Life, Don't Rely on Parents

Life is not all smooth sailing. Only by relying on oneself can one change their fate. There's a deeply moving story from the late 1980s. A man with hearing impairments married a woman who was not eloquent and slightly clumsy. The entire village watched, curious to see what kind of child they would have.

This couple had a daughter who grew up to be the prettiest girl in the village. She was called Jane. Since childhood, she frequently heard people say, "Such a smart and beautiful child but with parents like that, she is so pitiable." However, Jane was always stubborn; she didn't believe she was the "pitiable" person the village spoke of.

After graduating from elementary school, she chose to drop out and joined the village's performance troupe as an apprentice. She put her heart and soul into her work, believing that only by relying on herself and acquiring enough skills could she change her fate. She didn't just learn to sing and play instruments; she also read many books in her spare time.

Four to five years passed, and she became a highly respected figure in the troupe. Her outstanding appearance and profound knowledge made her performances widely popular. Gradually, more people started inviting her to perform.

Some say, "Life is like walking on thin ice; just as you catch a breath, a new challenge arises." Just as Jane’s life was gradually improving, her mother was diagnosed with colon cancer. Frequent hospital stays and chemotherapy quickly depleted their resources.

To earn more money, Jane worked even harder. However, the sudden arrival of the 2020 pandemic completely disrupted her livelihood, leading her to lose her income entirely.

Her mother's illness worried her deeply, and the lack of financial resources made her even more anxious. There's a saying: "If you are heading for debauchery, not even a deity can save you; if you are growing, even a dire situation can bring a new beginning."

Facing the inability to perform live shows, she decided to live stream singing online. Friends suggested she glam up to attract more male fans, but Jane firmly believed that the most touching aspect is humanity. She was in a modest rural setting, a simple and beautiful girl, with ordinary parents but a curious innocence in their eyes. This stark contrast drew over 20,000 fans on her first night of streaming. These fans were mostly dreamers living far from their hometowns.

Through her live streaming, these fans felt familiar scenes and moving songs, soothing their homesickness. Jane rediscovered her life's value and earned a considerable income through live streaming, improving her family's financial situation.

Now, when the villagers see her parents, they say, "You're blessed to have such an accomplished daughter." When this happens, her parents point to the picture of their daughter on the phone screen and give a thumbs-up.

"Destiny ultimately cannot defeat us. When you're feeling low, just look around, and see what it can stir up. Over time, you'll realize that it's ultimately like a child, or rather, it is a child, our own child. Our destiny is shaped by our own hands. In the end, we are the creators of our own destiny."

Perhaps in childhood, you can rely on parents, but as time passes, life changes unpredictably. Parents cannot always be with us, nor can they always shield us from life's challenges. Some say, "Having parental support is a straight road, lacking it is a winding road."

On this winding road, only those who endure it alone will realize that life is about constantly refining, repairing, and shaping oneself, meeting a brand new and better version every time.

This Life, Don't Rely on Marriage

My close friend got married right after graduating from college and soon became pregnant. At that time, her husband's business was doing well, so she chose to resign and become a full-time housewife. People often say that being a homemaker is one of the most perilous occupations, and she fell victim to it.

One of the things that distressed my friend most during her time as a full-time homemaker was the frequent words from her husband: "You want money again?" He couldn't understand her efforts and only complained that she didn't do anything but spent too much money. She felt extremely oppressed in this passive role.

Therefore, my friend decided to do something to break free from this situation. At the time, the trend of purchasing agents was rising, and she began a purchasing business in partnership with a male classmate. However, this almost destroyed her marriage. Her husband suspected her of having an inappropriate relationship with her classmate and physically abused her because of it. Frustrated, my friend went back to her parents' home.

Upon her friend's referral, she became a substitute teacher in a school. Concerned about her teaching abilities, she diligently prepared and refined her teaching materials. She rehearsed in front of experienced teachers until she felt adequately prepared to start teaching. She prepared for every class with such meticulousness.

Midway through the semester, her class unexpectedly achieved the first position in the entire grade, surprising everyone, including herself.

During that time, she deeply realized that hard work doesn’t go in vain. Her effort gave her confidence and direction in life. Following this, she moved to work for a training institution, and many students who had attended her classes before eagerly signed up for her courses. Her husband, seeing her transformation, was equally shocked and started regretting his past reckless behaviour. He hoped she would forgive him and resume being a homemaker. However, my friend's stance was resolute: she could return home, but her career would not be abandoned. Her effort gave her a sense of accomplishment and happiness.

Gradually, her reputation grew, allowing her to break away from her previous institution and establish her own training centre. Even with increasing students and hiring more teachers, she personally took on the teaching responsibilities. Not only did she no longer ask her husband for money, but she also covered the household expenses during her husband's business downturns.

"The road has to be walked step by step; suffering has to be endured mouthful by mouthful. Pulling sinew and skin is the only way to transform and grow, besides this, there are no shortcuts." Marriage has never been a sanctuary for anyone, and sometimes, it's the beginning of nightmares for some. A person must rely on themselves. Instead of seeking warmth from another's shoulder, it's better to soar against the wind and be self-reliant. Only one's bank balance and individual abilities are the greatest assurance in navigating the world. As long as we have our protective umbrella, regardless of stormy or sunny times, we can move forward courageously.

In This Life, Don't Rely on Children

It's best not to expect too much from others because everyone has their own difficulties. Let me tell you about my neighbour, Aunt Gong's experience.

Aunt Gong has an only son who lives abroad. Eight years ago, her husband passed away due to a stroke, leaving her living alone. Her son, feeling pity for his mother, brought Aunt Gong over to live with him abroad.

However, things took an unexpected turn. Aunt Gong and her daughter-in-law didn't get along. In less than two months of living abroad, they had several arguments. Seeing the dilemma her son was in, Aunt Gong firmly chose to return home alone.

Upon her return, Aunt Gong's hair turned almost completely white. Initially, she didn't pay much attention to it. But every time someone saw her, they'd ask in astonishment, "What happened? Why did your hair turn white?" Each time she heard such questions, it caused her heartache and tears.

Hence, she decided to visit a hair salon and dye her hair black. People who saw her afterwards commented, "Wow! You look so much younger." Aunt Gong smiled and said, "My old partner left, but I am still alive. Since I'm alive, I should live well."

Looking in the mirror, she found she indeed didn't look as old, and she felt much better emotionally. Aunt Gong said, "When you're old, you can't rely on your son; he has his own family, and I must rely on myself."

After changing her mindset, Aunt Gong started exercising in the mornings, rested after lunch, played cards or danced with the old ladies in the neighborhood in the afternoons. When her health allowed, Aunt Gong frequently traveled and even found a new partner, beginning a late-life romance. She moved into her new partner's house and rented out her own.

She said, "Raising children may not prevent aging; instead of relying on children, it's better to rely on oneself."

As one grows older, they need three things: a healthy mindset, a robust body, and sufficient savings. Only with these can one avoid what the ancients said: "Life is short, and in the blink of an eye, old age arrives." In old age, facing many troubles, one can only slowly swallow them on their own.

"Others are not obligated to help you." When you fall, there may not always be someone to help you up; when you're short of money, there might not be someone to give you charity; when you feel aggrieved, there might not be someone to care. In times when no one assists, one must stand on their own; in times of poverty, one can only rely on their efforts; when there's no help, one must solve problems on their own. Self-reliance surpasses dependence on others; it's better to rely on oneself.

Between people, it's impossible to fully comprehend each other's sorrows and joys or truly experience the other's feelings. Even if others are good, in the end, you still need to rely on yourself to find true happiness. When facing the brutality of society, financial pressures, life's setbacks, the shattering of love, and the complexities of human nature, you gradually understand: you must be your own shelter, no longer needing to evade storms.

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Life is Like a Journey of Repayment!

Not Worth It

"What makes people feel weary is not the distant mountains but the grain of sand in their shoes." Many people facing setbacks in life aren't dealing with enormous challenges, but rather trivial things. Yet, it's these seemingly unimportant little matters that continually drain one's energy. With life spanning just a few decades, why bother with those unworthy people and matters? Why let insignificant trifles upset us? Inner peace and tranquillity will foster a more joyful state.

Don't Entangle Yourself in Unworthy Matters

In this world, every matter has its cost. Wasting time on unworthy matters inevitably leads to missing out on other wonderful opportunities.

In ancient times, there was a person named Min who bought a clay pot on the road and accidentally broke it. Without a glance, Min walked away. Some passersby found this odd and asked, "Your pot is broken. Why didn't you even take a look?" Min replied, "The pot is already broken. What's the use in looking at it again?" This teaches us that many things we cannot change, but we can choose our own attitude.

For Min, staying back to regret a broken pot might have caused him to miss the inn for the night's rest or the opportunity to appreciate the beauty of the sunset. Rather than wasting one's life entangled in unworthy matters, the better choice is to move forward directly, not to linger, not to regret, and not to look back.

At any time and place, things not worth it aren’t worth regretting, and unworthy matters aren’t worth entangling. Be a calm, composed, and wise person.

Unworthy People, Not Worth Worrying About

Author David Pollay once wrote a book called "The Law of the Garbage Truck." He expressed the view that many people in the world are like garbage trucks, filled with complaints, anger, disappointment, and other negative emotions, wandering around.

Such people, when facing difficulties and setbacks, are full of complaints about life's unfairness. When experiencing emotional setbacks, they're constantly unhappy, affecting their normal eating and sleeping. Also, they find it difficult to let go of the rumours and gossip around them and secretly bear grudges. Such individuals are everywhere in life.

If you give these people a chance, they will pour various negative energies onto you, wasting not only your time but also draining your emotions. When facing such people, don’t invest too much of your emotions, just smile politely and then walk away gracefully.

Because you still want to enjoy the beautiful evening sunset, have a sumptuous dinner at home, share laughter with your family, and have heartfelt conversations with your children. Life becomes more precious as it ages; every day that remains is worth treasuring.

Don't let unworthy people affect your emotions; instead, pay attention to those who are more precious and significant in your life.

Unworthy Objects, Not Worth Clinging To

Have you ever experienced this?

You carefully fold those shopping bags, saving them for possible future use. But eventually, the pile of bags fills your cabinets, rarely finding any practical use, leading to their disposal.

Similarly, those leftovers from lunch carefully sealed and stored in the fridge for future consumption. However, just three days later, you find spoiled food, causing discomfort and extra expenses, damaging your health and wealth.

Sometimes, you might excessively value material possessions, sacrificing the quality of life. Wasting time on unworthy items actually limits your opportunity to enjoy better and more valuable things.

Considering that life doesn’t allow carrying these things forward, why compromise yourself? Throughout your life, don’t let meaningless items occupy your living space. Clear them out to make room for more cherished items, enhancing your life's enjoyment.

Life is beautiful yet brief; we genuinely don’t have much time and energy to waste on unworthy things. Free yourself from these limitations, and your life will shine once again. Reduce troubles, increase composure; decrease worries, increase freedom. No matter what difficulties life throws at you, always maintain a composed heart. May your desires come true, your actions be smooth, filled with joy, tranquillity, and peace.

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Embracing the Essence of Human Nature

Embracing the Essence of Human Nature

Most of the troubles in our lives actually originate from interpersonal relationships. Sometimes, a few words can make people feel warm, but sometimes a single expression can strike fear in them. There's a saying: "The human heart is unfathomable, human nature is ever-changing."

We absolutely should not overly trust specific individuals.

Not Many People Sincerely Want You to Succeed

Both kindness and darkness coexist in people; they often can't stand others doing better than themselves. People around you becoming successful is often more easily envied than those achieving distant glory. A proverb goes: "Aside from parents and a few close friends, there are very few people who genuinely feel happy because of your success. More people ask about your affairs just to confirm you're doing worse than them." Though brutal, this is a facet of human nature.

So, when you find yourself in trouble, do not expect support from others. There are many people to accompany you in joy, but very few willing to share your hardships. When you succeed, refrain from boasting to those around you. There are very few who genuinely rejoice in your success, while those who are envious are many.

Your life is your own, and it doesn't concern others. Experience pain, relish happiness without revealing the intricacies of life to others. Learn to be modest, composed, control your edges, and even in ordinary days, you'll shine.

Others Only See the Results; You Have to Go Through the Process Alone

Some say, "Every person has a fire in their heart, but those passing by only see the smoke." This phrase is deeply resonant. In the adult world, someone understanding you is fortunate, but relying on your own strength is the greatest support.

You hope others understand your struggles, but who isn't going through their own difficulties? You expect someone to traverse hardships with you, but who isn't carrying their own burdens?

Do not blame others for not understanding your plight, nor complain about the cruelty of reality or the indifference of human feelings. Because life is like this; others only see the outcome, while you face the process alone.

So, when you encounter a low point, don't disturb anyone, and never get upset because of being ignored. Don't feel disheartened due to being cold-shouldered; quietly work hard and put in the effort.

The less care you receive from others, the more self-respect and self-love you should exhibit. The more you lack companions, the more courageously you must move forward. Learning to grow within yourself is the way to flourish outwardly. Don't struggle with present emotions because your goal is to stand out based on your abilities one day.

Allow Yourself to Be You, Allow Others to Be Themselves

There's a popular question online: "How to deal with being around certain people whom you don't like but have to be with every day?"

A highly praised answer is: "Allow yourself to be yourself, while also allowing others to be themselves."

Interpersonal relationships are an unavoidable issue, and if you cannot accept it internally, it will bring suffering. Just as you need to allow that some people may not like you, you must also permit the existence of people around you whom you don't like. You must allow your thoughts to not be accepted and also permit others to adhere to their views. Don't force others to change, and don't compel yourself to assimilate.

In the world of adults, there is only filtering, not teaching; there's only choice, not change. Endurance will harm you, blaming will hurt the other person, only allowing will set you free. Ignore those you dislike, cherish those you like. Stick to what you love, allow what you don't, respect what you don't understand, and do what you should do. Don't harbor resentment, don't let things affect your inner self. Respect differences, self-reflect, and find inner joy.

Offer a Helping Hand, but Don't Strain to Assist

"People should do some voluntary work, but there's no need to go to excessive lengths to help others."

If it's within your capabilities, lend a hand, but if it goes beyond your abilities, you shouldn’t strain yourself.

If you put in a lot of effort to complete a task, and others consider it to be simple, not only showing no gratitude but also expecting more help from you; if you agree to help but can't manage, it not only disrupts the matter but also affects relationships, making you feel aggrieved and causing a negative impression.

So, when facing requests from others, don't take on things beyond your capability. Doing your best is an attitude, and acting according to your capacity is a wise decision.

Help to the best of your abilities when you can, and learn to refuse when it's beyond your capacity.

Don't overly worry about damaging relationships by declining; true friends will understand your predicament and won't make you uncomfortable.

Never Judge Others Casually

"Everything we hear is an opinion, not a fact; everything we see is a perspective, not the truth."

Never stand in your own position and casually judge others. This is the most basic form of respect between mature individuals.

If you haven’t lived through someone else's life, do not rush to express your opinion, as your comments will likely be one-sided. If you haven’t deeply understood someone else's life, don’t draw hasty conclusions, as your judgment could be incorrect.

There's a saying: "Kind words are like the warmth of winter; harsh words are like the chill of June."

Do not let the stinging words from your mouth become a blade that hurts others and ultimately harms yourself.

Understand that there are no secrets to be spoken; speaking cautiously is the wisest choice. The wiser someone is, the more they focus on themselves, while those restless and superficial individuals love to gossip about others.

Silently reflecting on one's own mistakes, refraining from easily judging others, doing things with a sincere heart, and being cautious with words is the way to live.

Don't Always Seek to Triumph in Words

"There are two kinds of people in the world: those who want to win, and those who want to win an argument."

When a person insists too much on winning verbally, it not only creates an impression of arrogance but may also appear undesirable due to emotional outbursts.

Never directly oppose others' views. Life is not an arena, and one shouldn't always seek to defeat others in verbal debates.

Understand that language is a tool for conveying emotions and solving problems, not a weapon for victory.

Many times, we seem to have the upper hand but actually suffer considerable losses. Arguing with loved ones, winning the argument but losing the relationship; arguing with unimportant individuals, winning vanity but losing dignity.

"Always aiming to win in words is the basest behaviour."

If you're right, there's no need for arguing; if you're wrong, there's no point in debating.

Learn to maintain the dignity of yourself and others in communication, provide a sense of superiority to others—this is the wisdom of dealing with people.

I strongly agree with the phrase: "The most valuable thing is not that we are all the same, but knowing that 'we are different' and still being able to respect and understand each other, communicate while maintaining our independence, without conforming, degrading, flattering, or crossing boundaries."

Interpersonal communication is like practicing, it requires wisdom. Learning to be sincere and setting boundaries, being close but not excessively so, being cautious and proper in handling affairs, and maintaining an appropriate distance in relationships are among the most important elements of sustaining all relationships.

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24 tips to make you socially successful in the world

Some feelings, only oneself understands

The saddest moments in life are when you truly don't want to say or do anything. You just want to be alone in silence for a while.

There are many people around you saying, "If you have any troubles, remember to talk to me." But every time you feel troubled, you open your phone, look at a long list of contacts, and don't know who to reach out to.

The words you want to say are always composed and then deleted. Or, when the call connects, and you hear the other person's voice, suddenly you don't want to talk anymore. No matter what others ask, you say everything is fine, it's okay.

In this world, there are some feelings that only you understand. No matter how you describe your feelings, others only understand the surface. Some people think you're not strong enough, some think you're too dramatic, and some even want to rub salt in your wounds.

I once saw a question: Why do people become silent as they grow up?

Because you start to understand that even if you say a lot, even if your dependence runs deep, the number of people who can truly help you is few. Sometimes silence is not because there's nothing to say, but it's more like, "Let me get through this toughest time, then I'll talk to you about the past with a smile."

Maybe one day, when we face the past, all the sad emotions can be relieved. All the entanglements, hesitations, and confusion will no longer be a stone at the bottom of your heart.

Just as the saying goes: "When you've walked through the darkest tunnel, you'll no longer fear any dark night. You'll have the courage to face all kinds of challenges and the confidence to become a better person."

Whether it's joy or sorrow now, learn to heal yourself, then silently strive, shining like a star, surprising everyone.

How have you been lately? How's your mood? When you're feeling down, how do you console yourself?

24 tips to make you socially successful in the world

1.

Remember this principle: no matter how close or familiar with other people, do keep a distance. Being close doesn't mean you can be messed around.

2.

If someone helps you, you have to thank them. Even if the other person offers advice and help that is of no use to you, you have to show your gratitude.

3.

When you talk to a person, if the other party always deliberately change the topic, it means that they are very sensitive to the topic, or do not want to continue. At this time, we should be appropriate to stop; when you talk to a person, but the other party is always looking at the watch, drinking water, or not facing you, indicating that others do not want to chat with you at this time, or very annoyed with you.

4.

Remember one thing: do not chat with people of different channels, different levels, different views. For example, if you talk to a person with low education, you talk to him about logic and he talks to you about morality and ethics, and if you all talk and talk, no one will be able to convince anyone, and you may end up fighting. The right approach is: when you meet a self-righteous person, you agree with whatever he says.

5.

We need to understand words within words.

Weekend busy? = I miss you; go back and wait for notice = the interview does not pass; I think about it = I will not consider at all.

6.

Remember one thing: politeness and kindness should be given to the right person, a gentleman's friendship is open and honest, a villain still needs a villain's plan. For example, when you are polite and courteous to a person, it is possible that you will get perfunctory, contemptuous, even abusive and bullying from others in return. Therefore, it is important to lose your temper appropriately in order to let others know you exist and to make them respect you.

7.

When you earn money, just secretly rejoice, it is best not to let others know. As the saying goes: money cannot be revealed. When you are a little bit accomplished, you can be smug, you can be proud and arrogant. You think you will receive a lot of praise and admiration, but in fact, you will only attract people's hatred, jealousy and red, others will rack their brains to discredit you, suppress you, kill you, this is the human nature.

By the way, I would like to remind you that all those people in your circle of friends who are showing off their cars, brand names, dinners and villas are basically fake. They have only one purpose, to get you to join them and then cheat you out of your money.

8.

According to psychologists’ research: when you go to an unfamiliar environment, let others help you do some small favor, can make each other's relationship warm up quickly. The reason is that when you ask someone for a favor, they will think that you recognize them, need them, and trust them, and thus their goodwill towards you will be greatly enhanced.

For example, when you have just joined a company, you can try to borrow a pen from someone around you, borrow a piece of paper, ask for the location of the bathroom, ask for the WiFi password ...... These things may all seem small and minor, but they can promote mutual relations and ease all kinds of embarrassment in order to allow you to better integrate into the new company!

9.

You can be polite and sassy, but don't be too soft. It's good to treat people with courtesy, but you also have to distinguish what kind of people they are. For the kind that is unreasonable, like to take advantage of people, do not need to be polite to him, hard, he would not dare to bully you.

You have to acknowledge a very solid fact: good people are not always rewarded with good things; on the contrary, good people will often be taken advantage of. Another point is that justice that is late is not justice. For example, a person is wrongly convicted and imprisoned for decades. Can you call it justice when it takes decades to be cleared of wrongdoing? You let a person be imprisoned for decades for no reason, is that also justice?

10.

No matter what time of day, when talking to anyone, do not look down and play with your mobile phone, it is a reflection of your upbringing. When you look down and play with your phone, you are disrespectful to the other.

11.

Compliments are the most effective and least costly way to give to others. It's not flattering, it's a reflection of how we can improve our relationship.

Everyone likes to hear good things, no one likes to be criticized. Even if you find out that the other person is wrong, don't say so right away, otherwise they will not only not appreciate it, but will also resent you. Remember the saying: Letting a person admit their mistake to their face is tantamount to depriving them of their self-esteem, and it's strange that they won't fight with you.

12.

No matter what happens, do not be an afterthought.

When a thing fails, do not say to others: "If you had listened to me", "do not listen to my words, suffer in front of the eyes" such windy words, although this is very cool to say, but in the eyes of others, you are gloating, false compassion, and thus resentment towards you. This is a good thing to say, but to others, you will appear to be gloating and faking compassion, which will lead to resentment. The right thing to do is: either enlighten him or offer him help.

13.

Never fantasise: by approaching rich people, you can achieve the dream of becoming rich overnight.

Let alone whether you can meet a rich person, even if you do, do you have the ability to make a rich person look at you? If so, you don't have to have this dream.

 

14.

An online job fact: If you are looking for a job online and the other party doesn't ask you anything, or just chat with you for a few minutes, then ask you to go to an interview directly. Don't go, he just wants to trick you into getting his KPI.

In fact, many HR departments have a track record of interviewing at least a few people a month. So, the personnel department will post job information everywhere on the Internet, as long as someone comes to ask, they will directly about the interview, regardless of whether you meet the conditions, you people over the line.

For example, a company is recruiting for a certain position and requires at least one year's experience. And you're a fresher, and he knows about it, but he calls you over for an interview anyway. When you went, he went through the whole interview process with you very patiently and then told you to go back and wait for the notice. There is no doubt that you are eliminated.

15.

Anyone who has something to find you, or wants to contact you, will take the initiative to say hello to you the first time after you add him. If the other party adds you, you do not take the initiative to say hello, and he has not said a word. No need to think much about it, just delete it. It might just be a marketing number.

16.

When you meet difficulties, and gets a loan, even if the other party doesn't press you to pay back the money, you have to pay back a little every once in a while to show that you haven't forgotten.

Also, when you pay back the money, it's a good idea to show it. Either give a little extra interest or treat the person to a meal. That's being human! It's not hard to borrow and return; it's easy to borrow money and not to forget, but when you return it, you have to return it.

 

17.

When a person's tone is not quite sure, no need to ask further questions, it is obvious: he is refusing you.

For example, you invite a person out for a meal, but the other person says: "I'll think about it". Don't think too much about it, the person is rejecting you. Words like this and more: "I'd like to see", "Some other time", "Let's see how it goes", "Let's see the weather ", "Let's talk about it then" ......

18.

When you come out into society, put aside the influence of your family of origin on you. Whatever happens, don't think about your family of origin and don't let others bring it up.

We are all adults now, and if we come out, we will have to rely on ourselves sooner or later. Don't feel inferior because of your family's poverty, but likewise don't forget the kindness of your parents' upbringing.

19.

Changing the minds of others is one of the stupidest, most laborious and unappealing things you can do, don't do it!

None of us are saints or teachers and have no obligation to convert or teach others. Therefore, when you find that the other person's views are misplaced, you should not expose him and correct him. You think you are helping him, while he thinks you are opposing him and ridiculing him. Not only will he not be grateful to you, but he will also resent you.

20.

In this fast-paced age of materialism and impatience, if you want people to trust you, show something practical that will help more than anything else!

For example, if you want someone to help you, giving a red packet and buying a meal is most useful. Don't say things like, "If you help me now, I'll share 50% of your earnings in the future." No one will believe you, they will only believe in the immediate benefits.

21.

in order to protect yourself, remember one thing: in any public place, do not feel free to judge others.

There are ears on the wall, and what you accidentally say today could be the trigger for someone to get you in trouble later. Remember: trouble comes from the mouth, this saying will never go out of fashion.

22.

Don't speak too straight, even if your words are justified, no one likes to hear the truth, especially the bad truth.

23.

Things that have nothing to do with making money, try to do as little as possible, or simply do not do.

Why are you poor? It is because you not only earn less money and spend more money, but also always go to some meaningless social, drinking and dinner.

24.

Do not be busy bodies. We are all just ordinary people who can't afford to get into trouble.

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20 brutal truths about society that are so hard to take, yet you have to admit

20 brutal truths about society that are so hard to take, yet you have to admit

Let's say a very harsh truth: when a person is born into a poor family, the odds are that in the future, that person will be an average person.

If I ask you a question: "What is the most important thing in this world?"

I believe many of you would say: time, life, health, love, affection, sun, water ...... However, I would say that you are all wrong! Personally, I think money is the most important, if you don't believe me, I will analyze it step by step below for you to see.

The fact that the boss is able to buy an hour of your time for a couple of dollars means that time is not worth anything.

When a person is in critical condition and goes to the hospital, as long as there is no money, the hospital most likely will not save.

If health is more important than money? Then why are there still many people who are willing to work overtime and stay up all night for the sake of that pitiful salary, regardless of their health?

Some people say, "Money can't buy love". This statement is true, but love without money is rarely successful in reality.

Natural resources like sunlight, water and air, which everyone can have, would not be worth much.

So, although money is not everything, it does matter in a way; especially for ordinary people like us, where money is, so to speak, of paramount importance.

So, what should we do as ordinary workers to make a more secure life? Why not take a look at these few harsh social truths below.

1.

A person, only when he is bent on getting money, he will live through, live to understand, live more intelligently. The most difficult thing to do in this society is to transfer the money from other people's pockets to your own, which is what we call "making money".

When a person is out in society to make money, he or she will find ways to claim benefits for themselves, thus improving their thinking and cognitive skills.

For example, when you are running an online shop, you are constantly thinking, exploring, analysing and summarising your experiences every day, so that your online shop turnover can be improved.

To open an online shop, you not only have to learn skills such as operation, design, copywriting, marketing and accounting; over time, all your abilities will be enhanced and when you look at a thing, you will also see it more objectively and comprehensively and know the logical principles behind it.

Therefore, earning money can force a person to make progress, and it can also force a person to improve his or her professional skills so that he or she can better adapt to the society. Only when a person earns money will he or she have a more profound knowledge of this society and really understand the mechanism of its operation.

2.

When a person belittles you, no matter how well or flawlessly you do, he will still talk down to you. Therefore, when you meet this kind of person, try to stay away. With his words, you will become more and more inferior, less and less self-respecting, and you will always be afraid of doing anything, and you will never develop and progress.

When he is your boss, you need to find a way to get away from him. If you work with him, all you will ever get is criticism, blame, belittlement, contempt, and even abuse.

3.

It is well known: the fastest way to make money is to take advantage of the information gap. For example: among all people, only you know the gap of a certain software, and then you can make a lot of money through this technique.

However, the current era of rapid development of information, a lot of knowledge, technology has long been open and transparent, ordinary people want to make money from the information gap has become much more difficult. Therefore, when a person tells you a way to make money for no reason, you should be extra careful, he is most likely to lie to you.

A very simple truth: when a money-making road to take the initiative to find you, it means that this road has long been known, not to make money; either the other party wants to cheat you of investment, course fees, etc., do not fall for the scam.

4.

Remember the saying: the biggest stumbling block on the road to making money, that is feelings!

We all need to understand: money in many cases, will be much more important than feelings. As long as there is money, feelings can be slowly cultivated, everything is not a problem; but without money, even if you have deep feelings, no one is willing to make money with you.

In today's society, marriage is a very costly affair. A house, a car, bride price, all kinds of expenses, which does not cost money? If you don't have money, you should be single. No one will be stupid enough to marry someone who doesn't have money.

I believe we have all seen such an example: a few people from the same village invest in a business together, and at the beginning, we were united and had small successes.

However, as time went on, some of them started to be lazy. When the other partners saw this, they didn't dare to say anything for the sake of face and affection. So the lazy ones get more and more reckless, leading to a steep decline in performance and eventually to bankruptcy. There is another possibility: the common uneven division of money, which is also likely to lead to bankruptcy.

Or, there are many couples who run small shops and restaurants together and see their business booming, but in the end the two start to fall out over the sharing of money, or even get divorced.

Therefore, in the way of making money and starting a business, it is best not to partner with people who are too close with you, you must be ruthless and give up your feelings, so that you can start a successful business.

5.

Remember this: if you want to make money, you have to be thick-skinned, shameless and unethical! Anyone who follows the rules of morality, who loves to save face, who is affectionate and shy, the odds are that they will not earn any money.

As an ordinary worker, we all need to understand one thing: the so-called moral rules are merely tailored by the strong for the weak. The strong are strong because the strong never follow the moral rule and dare to break the inherent rules in order to eventually stand out from the crowd.

The weak are weak because they have always followed the rules set by the strong, and have spent their lives in a world planned by others, like rats in a cage, so how can they become strong?

6.

If you don't want to be ordinary, if you want to make a lot of money, then don't have a moral burden. If you don't want to be squeezed and exploited, then go ahead and squeeze and exploit others! There are so many "leeks", if you don't harvest them, someone else will. The best way to get out of poverty is to join the ranks of capital, to change from passive to active, to teach the world that it is better for me to be negative than for others to be negative.

Think carefully: which of the people around you who are working honestly and in a disciplined manner have become rich? Which one of them has been able to achieve glory and prosperity? They all work hard day in and day out, but in the end they can only afford to eat and sleep, and they may not be able to afford a house or a car for the rest of their lives.

7.

When you have no value, you have more friends, but also useless. The phrase "more friends, more roads" is one-sided, and should be: when you have a good journey, the world is your friend; when you are poor and struggling, even girlfriends, relatives do not want to know you. This is the naked reality, and I hope you can understand it.

In short, you have to rely on yourself at all times. Think about it, the people who are willing to make friends with you are usually about as strong as you are, and the odds of getting ahead are very slim. Besides, even if they do get rich, the odds are that they will leave you behind. You should not be surprised, this is human nature.

8.

You have to be careful of those people who are full of good sense, benevolence and morality, these people are bad at heart, but they often teach others to be selfless, to be grateful and not to be concerned about gains and losses ......

There is a song that goes like this: "If only everyone gave a piece of love, the world would become a better place." There is nothing wrong with the intent of this lyric, but the prerequisite for it to be realised is that everyone has to abide by a moral code. Think about it? If 99 out of 100 people give selflessly, but one person not only doesn't give, but also takes for himself what the other 99 people have given. And that person is the "capitalist" who teaches people to be selfless.

Therefore, please be careful with your kindness and love, don't give blindly and don't help others blindly. For example, if your boss asks you to work overtime day and night every day, this is not called giving, it is called oppression and exploitation.

9.

When a person is born in a poor family, this person in the future, the probability will be an ordinary person.

Perhaps you will never know, nor have you experienced, how inferior a child from a poor family of origin is inside. From a young age, he has no money and cannot buy the toys he wants. His parents always teach that the family is poor, so don't give them any trouble outside. So when he was bullied, he was afraid to say anything for fear of giving his parents too much trouble. Over time, they become more and more timid, afraid to try anything, and they don't even have the strength to speak up.

They are afraid of failing, of getting their parents into trouble, of getting into trouble that the family cannot afford ...... In the end, they can only bear the grievances and tears in silence, and gradually give themselves up under the ridicule and bullying of others.

In other words: children from poor families are like those who have just put on sandals from bare feet, walking carefully for fear of breaking them ...... Their thinking is: they no longer expect tomorrow to be better, they just hope that tomorrow will not be worse than today.

10.

The easiest social skill: looking good, which is the most useful, least expensive and lowest risk method. To put it bluntly, when you're good-looking, your farts smell good; when you're ugly, you can't even breathe right.

So when you are good looking, you can use that to make a lot of money; when you are not good looking, and have no money or talent, then you either have to work honestly or find another way to forge a new path.

11.

Friends, have you ever heard the saying: "Money is spent, and the more you spend, the richer you get". It says that people who are frugal with their money will never earn it. The most important thing is that you have to be able to get a lot of money to spend.

But you know what? Do you know who is saying these things? The answer is the capitalists and various lending institutions. Their aim is simple: they want you to spend and take out loans so that they can get something for nothing.

If you don't believe me, you can try it out: take the tens of thousands of dollars you have saved up with your hard work, go drive a Mercedes, go buy a LV, go invest, and see if you starve to death first or make money first in the end.

12.

Solve the problem of getting out of poverty first, and then solve the problem of getting out of being singles.

The reason is simple: when you're poor, you're all about making money and don't bother with anything else. Only when you have money can you survive, and only then can you think about anything else. And of course, you should not imagine that you will find a rich woman or a rich man who will give you money. There is no denying that some people have succeeded, but think about it: would such a good thing happen to you? If you were so lucky, why are you still so poor?

There is another very real reason: when you are poor, no one wants to be in a relationship with you. Especially not the men. As long as you don't have money, none of those crooked women will want to marry you.

13.

Sleep is a very important thing, and we spend about a third of our lives sleeping. When a job takes up most of your time, making you even sleep is not enough; or, every day let you stay up late and work overtime, or even overnight ...... these jobs are not worth, can quit it. We poor people were already miserable, don't even want our own health? Now you use your life for money, you'll have to use money for medicine in the future, and it's not enough to make ends meet.

14.

Whenever you can, save as much as you can, and don't spend as much as you can.

The reason is simple.

Firstly, the bosses nowadays, when they don't like you, they can fire you at any time, so the risk of you losing your job is high.

Secondly, hospitals are so expensive that you have to pay for all kinds of tests and fees to get in, so you can't afford to get sick.

Thirdly, the mortgages nowadays are so cold and ruthless that you cannot cut off your mortgage payments even in special times like the current epidemic. If you break your mortgage, your house will be gone, but you will have to keep paying the loan; if you can't finish it in this life, let your children and grandchildren pay it for you; if you pass on the loan, your children and grandchildren will have endless loans.

Fourth, nowadays, prices, housing prices and fuel prices are all rising, but only wages are not. If you spend recklessly again, you probably won't be able to save money.

15.

All the relationships on the network, are dispensable, are consumption, you must know how to properly abandon. For example, you have a lot of friends in a certain letter, a certain voice, a certain game, who talk to each other. Therefore, you think you are a socialite. In fact, these are virtual, only briefly comforting your emotions and not at all useful in reality. What's more: it's hard to tell right from wrong on the internet, and there are many scammers, so you should be careful.

16.

Remember one thing: what you can't have now is equivalent to what you don't have now. For example: the pie your boss draws for you, the promises your boyfriend/girlfriend gives you, the things others casually promise you ...... don't believe in any of these, they don't exist.

17.

If you are born in a poor or average family, you have to do this: stay away from the poor education your parents gave you.

To put it mildly: the very fact that your parents were so poor means that their level of knowledge, cognitive ability and thinking patterns were somewhat flawed. Therefore, the education, advice and guidance they give you is basically incomplete, unobjective and unreliable, so don't listen to them. If you listen to them, the chances are that you will be like them in the future.

Of course, you can learn from their approach, attitude and social experience, as well as their maturity, love and reasoning, but don't listen to their guidance on key issues.

18.

The reason why you may think a person is not emotionally intelligent is because you are not important in his heart. When he is to important people, his emotional quotient will pull up in a straight line.

19.

Always keep this in mind: "Anyone who says that he can take you to make money, don't believe it! His purpose is simple, he just wants to earn your money. When you find a business, investment projects are low threshold, low risk, high return, the project is often a high input, high risk, low return, and will certainly end up with no money!"

20.

When you have money, in the eyes of others: you are all merits; when you do not have money, in the eyes of others: you are a complete failure.

If you don't believe me, you can pay more attention to the people around you. Whenever a rich person can't afford to spend money, he is said to have the virtue of thrift and frugality; but when a poor person can't afford to spend money, he is said to be "a poor man, and a stingy one, yuck!"

In conclusion, I sincerely hope that you will not remain poor all your life. For it is too hard to be poor, to put in the most work and not get the rewards you deserve. To work hard all your life and not even be able to afford a small house ...... I also believe from the beginning: the world will get better and better and the number of poor people will get smaller and smaller.

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Learning to give up is the beginning of the road to wealth and freedom

All the poor people are stuck in a trap, and all the rich people are busy setting up traps, many poor people cannot even react and thus trapped for life. So when you get up in the morning, don't be stupid and read useless entertainment news or click on funny pictures. This is the most conducive time for us to do creative work, because this is the moment when the mind is at its clearest. Take out a book that is normally hard to read and read it for two hours, then work hard, work hard to make money.

We need to make money to survive, and to make money, we need to rely on a flexible brain, learn to manage resources, do reliable things. For example, a friend of mine had an advertising company, made a fortune, and then began to speculate in stocks. He has no knowledge in stocks, lost a lot of money then came a relative's serious illness, completely left him bankrupt, also owed a lot of foreign debts. He was also depressed and lost confidence, and did not want to do anything.

Although he had no money, his friends would think of him and invite him out to a party. Once, during dinner, a friend said that he needs help to name his child. There came an opportunity, so he gave that friend a call and said, "Let's do a naming service, and I'll package your interest as a means of making money.

I'll find the clients; you just take care of the naming. His friend didn't hesitate to say yes. I immediately started printing business cards, but also a virtual company name, the name of the buddy to do the packaging, these for him to do this kind of advertising people, it is not a problem. The next step was to start running around the hospital non-stop. He looked for doctors or nurses in obstetrics and gynaecology to work with, and gave people a hundred percent of the commission for every single name business they introduced. This is considered precision marketing, once there is business, people will contact him.For the company naming business, he found a business and industry agency to work with. Later, he found someone to do a website, through a variety of channels of marketing, within a year he was up, earning hundreds of thousands of dollars.

I know a lot of people in the process of starting a business, everything to save money, then we will talk about saving, saving is a traditional virtue, but I always think too much saving is a disease. Many people just talk to the poor about how to save money and to the rich about how to cultivate their bodies and strengthen their spiritual civilisation. It's all about making a living, I get it. Those who burn incense and kowtow in temples are all millionaires and multi-millionaires, and those who usually stay with monks and talk are also rich people. Monks are human beings too, and all human beings have human nature!

For example, if we make money on the internet, some people have been straightforward and don't bother to spend money. They quietly feel their own way, a few months have passed and there is nothing to gain. Thinking that there is nothing to lose, anyway, there is no money invested, the key question is, by others pointing out, instantly enlightened, on the road, how much money can be earned in a month? As we all know, all the secrets to making money are things that people figure out for themselves, the key question is, do you have that kind of wisdom? Everything is simple, and everything is not. The so-called secrets of making money, whatever you don't know, will always be a secret.

There are also many friends who do business on the Internet, some by their own deadlines, desperately, making money. But really want to make a lot of money, you have to rely on paid promotion, free promotion not only to rely on physical strength, but also to fight with the rules of the platform, a little tired. But paid traffic channels, is to spend money to test, only constant testing, constant spending money, it is possible to burn out experience. Most people care too much about money, so it is impossible to spend money to test the experience.

For example, on a high altitude glass walkway, although you know that this glass is 100% safe, but, you are still scared inside. So, to be a paid traffic channel, you have to think of money as a tool. Go test. A brother asked me about going to a local public website and spending $3,000 to see if he could make money. He asked me if he could guarantee to make money. If you can make money, you'll do it, but if you can't, you won't. I then said: it's not a matter of making money or not, it's a matter of your thinking. You have to get into the habit of spending money; it's a sure way to your wealth freedom. So, just spend the 3,000, it's not killing you, you should be happy and happy to spend it is. The road to wealth freedom, the road to paid traffic, is all measured out. People who are not willing to spend money are basically not connected to wealth freedom.

To survive, we must give up, we must die to free ourselves and release value. When you go to work, crazy to release value for the boss, when you work alone, desperately to release value for customers. Frankly speaking: releasing value like crazy and being habitually crazy is a habit. With this habit, we are all meat-eating lives in any field. So whoever can create wealth for society, society will reuse them. Don't move to complain that the sunshine of society can't shine on us, if we are so much higher than others, how can the sunshine not shine on us?

In fact, a man, with no woman and career, to a large extent is a person without courage caused by, for example, entrepreneurship, this thing, not many people dare to do, pick up this thing, the same not many men dare to do. A lot of people don't dare to spend money on learning, or they hesitate to do so, dragging their feet and making themselves worthless. Then he'd rather spend the money on useless entertainment. So those of us who are determined not to have any interaction with such people, all our actions, must be marketing, must be making money, must be doing the right thing. All words, solved by marketing!

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