Truth or Tact at work

There exists a group of individuals in life who exhibit tremendous patience, obedience, yet seldom receive the fitting benefits. These individuals endure unfair treatment, refrain from refusing others' requests, and fail to actively seek their rights. Despite their efforts, they frequently find themselves unrewarded and eventually trapped in a dilemma of "the more honest you are, the more vulnerable you become." Everyone is striving at work, hoping for corresponding rewards. However, any job is far from being simple, and around 80% of life's pain usually originates from work. If you've recently felt unhappy due to work, perhaps consider changing your mindset and tell yourself: It's just work; there's no need to be too honest.

Work should be diligent and hardworking, but maintaining a student-like mindset is unnecessary.

"Because you're too obedient, sometimes what leaders fear is an overly obedient employee." This is a typical student mindset. Employees merely respond with "okay, okay, okay" and never proactively provide opinions or suggestions. Even when assigned a task, they merely address the specified points without further contemplation, akin to students fulfilling assignments by rote and command.

Nevertheless, the workplace is not like an exam, especially not a closed-book exam, and hence there's no fixed standard answer. Even if the leader raises questions, experienced professionals in the workplace often broadly seek help to provide appropriate solutions.

There's a little story about a boy attempting to lift a huge stone; his father encouraged him, saying, "As long as you put in all your effort, I believe you can lift it." The boy tried with all his strength, but the stone remained unmoved, and then he said, "I have given my all." His father responded, "You haven't given it your all; I've been here beside you, and you haven't sought help. Giving your all doesn't just mean using all your strength but also utilizing all the resources available to solve the current difficulty."

Many professionals in the workplace, like the boy lifting the stone, toil away diligently but fail to seek help. Perhaps they haven't realized they can seek help, or maybe they are unwilling to trouble others. In reality, solving any complex issue is a result of seeking assistance from various quarters.

"Social wealth is not allocated; it requires active acquisition by people." Learning to harness external support is also a skill, as an individual's solo efforts can't compare with collaborative group efforts.

Be careful not to compromise too much in everything; this behaviour may derail you at work.

Let me share a story of a former colleague. One day, he suddenly confided in me that he was dismissed from the company, which left me extremely surprised. He was a diligent and honest person, always willingly putting in extra hours at work without complaints. Colleagues often sought his help, and he never refused, always ready to be of service. Although he was terribly worn out, he never found the courage to express his dissatisfaction. He thought that his leaders would appreciate these efforts, but he never expected that despite all he did, he was eventually laid off, citing business restructuring and poor output. Before leaving, he said to me, "In the workplace, don't get too emotionally invested, or you'll end up like me." I felt sorry for him, but I suddenly understood the harsh reality of the workplace. The workplace does not favour those who are excessively honest. Many times, your troubles and grievances come from your 'I'm sorry' attitude. Such toil without accomplishment is ultimately seen as in vain. Leaders focus on results, hence dealing with matters effectively is key. Being truly responsible at work doesn't mean doing everything; it's about achieving significant success in the most crucial matters. Just like Warren Buffet's "5/25 Rule": Retain the top 5 important things and avoid doing the remaining 20 that are easily distracting, to achieve success. Less is more; knowing how to refuse is wisdom in the workplace. Excessive compromise in everything may lead you to lose yourself on the path of life. Life is short; don't let 'I'm sorry' ruin your life.

Learn to avoid self-consumption; that's the way out for honest people.

I once saw an article: A couple riding a donkey, and someone commented: 'these two are cruel, both riding on the donkey.' The wife got off, the husband rode, and the bystander said: 'The man is really selfish, making his wife walk.' So, the husband also rode the donkey, and the wife walked. But then someone speculated: 'The man is afraid of his wife, right?'

Finally, both had to walk alongside the donkey, and someone jeered: 'These two are so silly; they don't even ride the donkey!' This story is like a joke, and after reading it, you might laugh and think, 'How could people be so silly?' However, we often fall into the same trap in life, trying to please everyone.

Honest people are prone to excessive concern over these evaluations, affecting their emotions, resulting in inner turmoil. For instance, if the boss gets upset, you repeatedly replay the situation, guessing if you offended them; or when you send a message to a colleague and don't get a reply, you repeatedly think whether you said something wrong and became annoying; or feeling upset because you can't find a common topic with a colleague...

All these mental activities are actually unnecessary and should not exist. We can never please everyone. If we always measure ourselves against others' standards, we won't find the right path. To live a more relaxed life, cultivate a mindset that resists self-consumption and maintains inner stability. Though praise from others is good, excessive attention to criticism is unnecessary.

The 5 “balls” of life

Each of us juggles five "balls" in our lives: family, work, health, friends, and the soul. Among these five "balls," only work is made of rubber, it can be damaged and still bounce back. The other four "balls" are made of glass, once broken, they cannot be restored. If we make work the sole meaning of life, not only will it be dull, but it will also be futile.

It is because work is just a part of life, not all of it. Those who focus too much on work might lose some joy.

Remember, the purpose of work is to support life, not to burden it. Work is just a role; don't take it too seriously."

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The Relaxed Journey

Truly outstanding individuals never rush. They understand that success is not an overnight affair; it requires gradual progress and patient cultivation. Therefore, being down-to-earth, making steady progress, and ultimately becoming victorious is the mark of wisdom. Progressing slowly is a demonstration of wisdom. Those who don't rush are closer to success.

The more you seek immediate success, the more prone you are to anxiety.

Have you ever experienced this? You've been learning a new skill for a month without visible progress, causing you to doubt your adaptability. Or maybe you've been trying hard to lose weight for a week with no visible change in your weight, leading to a loss of motivation to continue. Or at the beginning of reading a book, you found it hard to comprehend, so you abandoned it. We always desire to see results quickly, but often give up midway, interrupting our path towards our goals. This results in anxiety and inner conflict, feeling time is unfair and becoming restless. Many times, impatience is unproductive.

For instance, I have a friend who graduated in design. Just three months into his first job, his designed products didn't receive approval from his boss, so he immediately resigned and switched companies. In his second job, after working for half a year, he felt a lack of achievement and earning potential in the design field, so he transitioned to sales. But a few months later, seeing his colleagues excelling in sales, he believed he wasn’t suited for sales. Now, he's shifted to administrative work and started feeling anxious about whether he's fit...

In fact, his professional abilities are strong; the problem isn't his competence but rather his impatient eagerness to achieve success and recognition. His colleagues who joined the company around the same time, with similar skills, have already made achievements. "The Analects" stated, "Haste makes waste; focusing only on small immediate benefits might lead to failure in significant matters." Impatience does not ensure smooth success; it might lead to issues.

Instead of hastily seeking outcomes and frequently giving up, it's better to adjust your pace and maintain patience and persistence. "Things and people in the world have their own time to develop. We need to keep improving ourselves and quietly wait for the opportunity to come." It takes ten years to grow trees but a hundred years to cultivate a person. Stability and patience, not impatience, are the keys to achieving something and becoming an outstanding individual.

Walking far is better than Walking Fast

Walking fast does not necessarily mean victory; real winners are those who can go far. I know a friend who never ranked within the top 20 of the class from elementary school to college, making him a typical late starter. He took the college entrance examination three times and, he says, luckily got into a good University.

Even in university, he never managed to rank among the top 40 students in his class. Even at graduation, he was still among the lowest performers. However, he persevered and never gave up.

During the graduation ceremony, he said, "Although my grades lag behind my classmates, rest assured, I won't give up, and I'll continue to strive." At the age of 31, he established his own company, and several of his former classmates, who had better grades than him, became his employees.

I really like a saying: "Life’s pursuit doesn’t begin with the starting point, but with the final reaching point." Life is a long-distance race, and most people, due to impatience, can't persist, even though they might have initially led. Yet those who persist, never give up, and embrace a long-term view, with the accumulation of time, eventually find success.

We’ve all heard the story of "The Tortoise and the Hare," with the turtle emerging victorious. Similarly, in life, the ultimate winners are often not those who start the fastest but those who can persist till the end.

"Life is like a marathon; the winner isn't the one who starts the fastest." Life is lengthy, and initial advantages need not boast, similarly, initial failures need not cause too much anxiety. Present success or failure does not represent the final outcome. It's by persisting, never giving up, that genuine success is harvested. Often, not rushing and walking slowly actually leads to a quicker achievement of the goal.

Seeking quick success does not lead to success; it's the steady and sure steps that lead to long distances. Slow progress will take you farther.

Truly Outstanding Individuals Understand Perseverance

Amazon's CEO once asked Warren Buffett, "Your investment philosophy is very simple, why others don’t imitate your approach?" Buffett replied, "Because most people are not willing to slowly accumulate wealth." Many are eager to achieve and hope to become millionaires overnight, yet the more they rush to get rich, the less successful they often become.

"What you accomplish in 5 years, I will do in 10; what you do in 10, I will do in 20. And if that's not enough, I will maintain my health and happiness until I'm 80, then come back to do it after seeing each of you off." Successful individuals understand the patience of continuous cultivation, steadily building strength and constantly reinforcing themselves.

Hence, there is no such thing as an "instantly successful" life; it is simply the result of long-term accumulation. They invest more time, work harder than others do.

No one can easily achieve success. Behind every brilliant achievement lies years of perseverance and tireless efforts. Only through a decade of careful honing can one create a sword that echoes throughout the realm. Those who truly put in the hard work and maintain continuous effort are the victors in life.

"If you want instant returns, do odd jobs;

If you expect income every month, be a wage earner;

Having patience for annual returns is for professional managers;

Waiting patiently for three to five years is for investors;

Only by evaluating life from a lifetime perspective makes one a winner in life."

In any era, the ultimate victors are those who can endure loneliness and weather the lows.

May you find your path in the coming years, proceed calmly, stay grounded, and take one step at a time, ultimately reaping bountiful rewards.

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Wealth beyond Riches: Self-Enrichment for a Rewarding Life

Life requires subtraction; consciously letting go of many things leads to a more composed and slower pace. Such a perspective holds profound wisdom. People often feel anxious and troubled because their minds are filled with too much negativity and complexity. These negative factors drain your emotions and energy, making your situation worse. Only by relinquishing things that deplete you can you create space for happiness and beauty. True self-enrichment begins with letting go.

Abandon Desires for Inner Peace

"The heavens won't bestow all happiness upon one person: having love doesn't guarantee wealth; having wealth doesn't guarantee happiness; having happiness doesn't ensure health; and having health doesn't guarantee all your wishes will come true." Throughout life, one must learn to abandon the greed of "I want it all"; only by letting go of desires can the heart find peace. If one entertains too many desires, the soul becomes restless and unsettled. At the end of desire lies only more desires. People ensnared in desires are often never satisfied—they achieve one goal but then yearn for the next. Those who yearn for everything usually end up with nothing. What people pursue in life is nothing but inner tranquillity and happiness. However, happiness has always been there; it's just that our eyes for perceiving happiness and beauty are obscured by desires. By renouncing desires, you will discover that the people you meet are helpful, the experiences you go through are enlightening, the flowers you admire are uniquely beautiful, the winds you feel are gentle, and the soil you smell is fragrant. This way, the soul will be fulfilled. In the remaining years, relinquishing desires will bring peace to the heart.

Let Go of Inner Turmoil for Improved Mood

Challenges exist in life constantly, but challenges themselves do not cause pain; what truly causes pain is the inner struggle. In reality, most of our troubles stem from inner conflicts.

Perhaps we care too much about others' opinions and judgments; an unintentional remark might linger in our minds for a long time.

Or we set too high standards for ourselves; failing to complete even a minor task perfectly leads to self-doubt.

This inner struggle is fundamentally a type of fear. Fear of not being recognized, fear of making the wrong choices, fear of facing the results of failure, fear of leaving behind regrets, fear of numerous possibilities.

The book "The Power of Now" proposes a perspective: overcoming fear and releasing inner struggles lies in focusing on the present moment. Only by focusing on the present and taking positive action can one free their mind from fear.

Living in the moment, concentrating one's thoughts and actions in the present moment, helps gather energy and tap into inner strength to gracefully face life's challenges. "What's missing in the present moment?" Reflecting on this, you'll realize you actually lack nothing at this moment.

When you truly release your inner turmoil, no longer troubled by gain and loss, you can calmly embrace both gains and losses. By letting go of inner expectations, the heart naturally finds tranquillity, and emotions become stable.

Letting Go of Regrets, Embrace the Goodness That Awaits

I once heard this saying: Perhaps regrets are the norm in life; imperfection is the true portrayal of life. I deeply resonate with this.

Throughout this journey called life, we often encounter regrets. You might regret missing the most precious love of your life or failing to embrace the one you deeply loved, harbouring regret. Perhaps you lament the mistakes made or the dreams unfulfilled that weigh heavily on your mind.

When your heart is full of regrets, you cannot savor the present joy or appreciate the beauty along the way. Being able to let go of regrets is a form of inner cultivation.

In fact, every regret holds its significance—those missed people briefly passed through your life, and those unfulfilled desires are part of your life.

Understanding the impermanence of life and allowing things to unfold naturally, just like allowing flowers to bloom and trees to grow, is the only way to truly let go of regrets. Only by releasing regrets can the burden be lifted from the heart, and only then can you move forward unencumbered.

Releasing regrets will reveal joy at every turn in life, beauty everywhere you look, and people you meet who are kindred spirits. When you truly let go of regrets, you'll discover that regrets themselves hold a certain beauty. Some people are just passers-by, but some stories are worth treasuring. Letting go of regrets fills your future with happiness and beauty.

Let Go of Attachments for Inner Tranquillity

I've heard this saying: If a person can't free themselves from their attachments, they can't be truly free. This holds true because deep attachments only create trouble and pain.

If one clings to a feeling that isn't reciprocated and cannot let go, choosing to start anew, or refuses to accept unchangeable facts while still holding on to unrealistic fantasies, it creates distress.

Deep-seated attachments might make one feel they have very little, causing them to obsess over someone or something, inadvertently glorifying the objects of their attachment. The more one clings to them, the more they influence and control.

Instead of continuously pursuing, it's better to release attachments and return to one's inner self. Become a person content from within, not fixated on someone or something, achieving financial and personal independence.

Do not excessively celebrate when gaining something or despair when losing. Maintain a sense of tranquillity and composure in facing life's ups and downs.

Once you let go of attachments, the heart can detach from desires, ceasing to attach to anything; this state of mind is tranquillity.

A serene heart can gather profound strength, remaining calm and composed, ultimately reaching the shores of happiness.

Attaining Peace of Mind

In life, many people pursue not happiness itself, but the happiness derived from comparing themselves with others, which is the root of unhappiness.

When a person adopts a mindset of comparison, constantly measuring wins and losses against others, it leads to anxiety and distress.

Seeing a colleague receive a promotion or raise while feeling stagnant oneself leads to envy and complaints about life's unfairness.

Noting that someone else's partner is exceptionally attractive while one's own isn't as satisfying could lead to blaming one's own fate.

Observing another's child being exceptionally bright while one's own is playful and mischievous can bring about feelings of disappointment and blame.

Constant comparison with others prevents one from experiencing inner peace and joy.

The act of comparison is, in reality, a thief that steals happiness. There's no comparability between the sun and the moon; they each shine brightly in their own time.

Each person's growth process is different, and it's not essential to rush. Excessive comparison only harms emotions and damages relationships.

Allow yourself, loved ones, and children some time; don't excessively compare with others. Follow your own path to avoid being influenced by others, thus stabilizing your emotions.

Only by releasing comparison can one achieve inner peace.

People with a tranquil mindset have no contention with the world and accept everything to unfold naturally. A mindset of tolerance and altruism not only nurtures the self but also brings nourishment to others, leading to natural beauty.

Let go of all mental strains, allowing the mind to freely roam, and relish a tranquil and liberated life.

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