Reclaim Your Evenings

Some people choose to watch videos, read the news, or catch up on entertainment gossip to relax after work. Others opt for exercise to alleviate the accumulated stress from the day. There are also those who indulge in a hearty meal and share their work woes with friends.

If you are a working parent, the after-work golden three hours are divided into two parts: one for the child and the other for themselves. Squeezing out some time from the busy schedule to improve oneself is crucial. Only by doing so can we bridge the gap between individuals. Year after year, why not make a resolution to change oneself within a year? Time will surely provide the answers.

Don't treat your life with indifference, as we are all aging with each passing moment. Life is what you make of it. Daydreaming and idleness each consume a day, but engaging in activities that yield results is more fulfilling. Therefore, ladies, let's not settle for mediocrity. Let's strive for self-improvement and seize control of our lives.

1. Reading

The golden hours after work are perfect for expanding knowledge. There are many ways to relax and unwind:

a. Read a book: Enjoy the experience of reading instead of treating it like a task. Immerse yourself in a good book to truly appreciate it.

b. Watch high-quality documentaries: Documentaries offer a real glimpse into the world, broadening our horizons and helping us find answers in this era of information overload.

c. Watch debates: Observing debates challenges our critical thinking skills and encourages us to view the world from multiple perspectives.

d. Watch highly-rated movies: Emotional peaks in movies often inspire creativity. They allow us to experience emotions we may not encounter in our daily lives and help us express ourselves through writing.

e. Attend online lectures: Continuing education through online lectures can broaden our horizons, especially practical courses that offer valuable skills.

2. Organizing Files

Take time to organize files on your computer and mobile devices. Categorizing them makes it easier to find what you need and frees up memory space. Cultivate the habit of organizing to improve work efficiency and avoid minor annoyances like slow devices or lost files.

3. Exercise

Engage in physical activity before dinner to stimulate your appetite and alleviate work-related stress. After a long day at the office, outdoor activities help relax and recalibrate your state of mind.

4. Pursue Hobbies

Whether it's programming, writing, photography, or painting, indulge in hobbies that interest you. Pursuing hobbies makes mundane days more enjoyable and enriches your life with valuable skills and experiences.

5. Complete Unfinished Tasks

Each day brings its own set of plans. Utilize the three hours after work to accomplish tasks outside of work responsibilities. As a writing enthusiast, I capture inspiration whenever it strikes and use this time to organize my thoughts and write articles. Focusing on work during work hours ensures that after-work time is fully devoted to personal pursuits.

In the end, life is what you make of it. Whether you choose to remain complacent or push yourself to strive for more, the choice is yours. Destiny lies in your hands—whether to hold on tight or let go is entirely up to you.

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The Best Version of Oneself

01

During a stroll, a cat encountered a snail slowly climbing up the wall.

The cat was very curious and approached to see if this snail felt that life was both long and meaningless, thus wanting to end it in such a gruesome way.

A snail, carrying its heavy shell, climbing on a steep wall, about two meters above the ground. If it fell, its shell would likely break, causing injury, possibly leading to its demise.

But it seemed unaware of this danger, still moving slowly. The cat asked the snail, "This is too risky, come down quickly, you'll get hurt. The sky is not a place you can touch, the ground is your habitat."

The snail moved its antennae and casually said, "What is a place I shouldn't go, and what is a place I should go? We are meeting for the first time, you are not familiar with my past, how can you define my future?"

The cat said, "Sorry, I'm just worried about you."

The snail continued, "Thank you for your concern. I will be responsible for my own choices. You go your way without stopping, and I'll endure my rain. Although it's cold at the top, I can see many views that are not usually seen. I'm prepared to be hurt, no matter what, this life must do something for oneself. Although the road ahead is difficult, almost impossible to others, I won't be shaken by their words. Some things need to be done by someone. Step by step, I can reach the end."

The cat didn't know the meaning of such perseverance. While contemplating, the snail moved a bit closer to the roof.

Everyone has their own path to take. How can you determine someone else's ending based on your experiences? There are always those who break barriers, those who sacrifice for their ideals. Don't attach the label of "I'm doing this for your own good" anymore. Too heavy a sacrifice will become pressure for others.

Walk your own path, whether it leads to laughter or tears, to blossoms or withering. Who can be sure?

02

Looking at the heavy shell on the snail's back, this journey must be exhausting.

With such a burden, can it really reach the end?

The snail seemed to sense the cat’s worry. It didn't speak but showed the answer through its actions.

It's slower in speed, technique, and even strength compared to other crawling creatures. Yet it continues to move forward with determination, despite the slow pace.

Yes, the snail carries so much weight, yet it's not afraid of difficulties. Why is the cat hesitating without even taking the first step?

The cat knows the burden on its shoulders well, and the cat also have the selfish desire to go far away. But the cat never knew how to balance the two, thus trapped in contradictions, unable to move forward.

The snail's journey unraveled the problem that had troubled the cat for a long time. Keep moving forward, it's difficult to break free from doubts by looking back and forth.

The journey of life is full of challenges, just to meet a better self.

03

Some people like sunny days, some like cloudy days, and some even like rainy days. We shouldn't give up our ideals because of others' remarks like "it's not good," "I don't like it," or "I think it won't work."

Those who have said I can't have not accomplished much in their lives. We're all the same, who's nobler than whom?

There's a saying: "The best time to plant a tree was ten years ago, the second-best time is now." Make progress every day, just keep persisting, and time will give you the answer.

The snail challenges the impossible, but who dares to say it won't be on the rooftop? As long as you persist day by day, anything is possible.

Time will give us answers, not those who keep denying you.

Instead of lingering on, struggling with conflicting thoughts, focus on the path ahead, walk slowly, walk firmly, walk the path you want, live the life you want.

Live happily, live a fulfilling life.

04

In the aging years, please be kind to yourself.

When tired, sleep early; when weary, rest well. Don't put too much pressure on yourself. Apply a face mask, soak your feet, eat something nice, drink something warm. Only by relaxing appropriately can you go further.

Those who love you won't mind if you're slow. Those who dislike you will find fault no matter what you do, so don't take it to heart.

No flower blooms from the beginning, nor does any flower remain in bloom until the end.

In the blink of an eye, it's a lifetime. Don't worry about what works or doesn't work. Only by doing will you know. What I found unbearable last year has become a thing of the past.

Days will only get better, and so will you. With this belief and action, no matter what others say, anything that stops you from getting better is nonsense!

For the rest of your life, don't exhaust yourself in busyness. Do things you like to improve your mood. Stay away from the crowd to get closer to yourself. Devote yourself to reading and encounter a better soul.

The best version of oneself is to live according to one's own will, without being humble or scornful, without envying or mocking others, without relying on anyone else. Each striving to live their own life well.

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The Golden Rule of Socializing: Focus on You, Not Them

Focus on You, Not Them.

It seems simple, but it's not easy to do. In the process of communicating with others, instead of overthinking about them, it's better to express yourself clearly.

As for the outcome, if you can chat, then chat; if not, then be quiet. If the other person lacks manners, then you also don't need to maintain yours all the time.

We should know that the essence of social interaction is actually about filtering and exchanging. Filtering is a set of standards for interaction, with your own feelings and interests as the bottom line; exchanging is one of the purposes of socializing, with your own resources as the exchange value.

So never ignore your own feelings. Not everyone is worth your time and energy to socialize with. And those worth your time and energy must pass through your filtering.

Just need to stick to two principles. The first principle is to care about your own feelings and defend your own interests. The second principle is to adhere to the first principle.

For those who turn against you, just turn against them directly. There's no need to analyze their behavior, speculate about their thoughts, or dwell too much on it. Even if it's a client, you still need to filter them appropriately, let alone colleagues or friends.

Some may ask, wouldn't this approach be too self-centered? However, is socializing not self-centered? So you only need to understand your own value and purpose, know your bottom line, and don't need to analyze or speculate about others.

If you don't actively filter friends, you'll be filtered by others. Some may also ask, wouldn't this mean you won't make friends? In fact, it's difficult to find like-minded friends throughout life. There's no need to forcefully make friends; avoiding internal conflicts and being comfortable with yourself is most important.

Moreover, not all so-called friends are true friends. It's better to focus on improving yourself. If you bloom, the breeze will come naturally.

Especially when you're feeling low and weak, you'll always think about others' company and inspiration. Continuously analyzing others will only lead to increasing feelings of inferiority and emptiness.

If this is the case, the biggest issue isn't communication but lack of confidence. The lower your confidence, the less you should care about others' words, not analyze others, and do what you think is right, focusing on completing your main tasks.

Remember, scumbags love people with a ‘victimized’ mentality the most. When your confidence rises and you're mentally strong, then actively absorb what's beneficial to you in social interactions. At this point, you won't fall into internal conflicts or doubt yourself again.

True social champions all have one thing in common: they confidently defend their interests, express their feelings clearly and assertively, and always prioritize themselves.

Here are a few suggestions:

1. Don't be afraid to confront conflicts. Relationships that can be torn apart, don’t matter much.

2. Maintain eye contact during conversations to let the other person feel your presence.

3. Knowing what you want is enough; there's no need to analyze others.

4. True strength lies in accepting your imperfections. Don't lose confidence because you think you're imperfect.

5. Don't attempt to change others, including your parents. Smart Adults only filter, they don't educate.

Everyone should care about their own feelings, but not to the extreme, and not to stubbornly persist. You need to weigh the pros and cons, act accordingly, and realize that treating social interactions as a zero-sum game won't last long.

If you encounter someone with a similar magnetic field or frequency, perhaps you'll be willing to unconditionally treat them well.

You are the protagonist of your life, overcome the challenges, and become a better person.

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Crafting a Better 'You'

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